What did just happen?
by ilovemyself26
Summary: Ashley is a famous rock star that doesn't care for anyone until she meets Spencer.. What is gonna happen between those two?
1. Chapter 1

**This is my new story. I hope you like it as well. I'll try to update as much as I can. I wouldn't want for you to wait! Enjoy!**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 1**

Being a famous rock star has its ups and downs. Talking about me definitely has its ups. I am not sallow or anything. I'm just saying. I love to be adored. As my friends back in high school said 'I'm self absorb'. Come on.. It's not my fault. I'm a famous rock star, hot as hell, with a lot of money and nothing to care. It's not my fault that every girl has probably a crush on me and it's not my fault that I love them very much. But that's me in the outside world. When I am all alone I can't stop thinking that I do not have someone to care. I don't have someone to love me for who I am.

Rita Hayworth once said "They sleep with Gilda and not me". Gilda was her big role at the cinema. I don't compare myself with Rita Hayworth of course, but I do believe that when I sleep with someone they sleep with me only because it's the myth who they crave. The rock star. They don't sleep with the real me. That's why I don't attach with people much. I don't do relationships and beside Aiden, my high school best friend, and my sister Kyla I have no one.

I chose this path. I chose to be alone. Do drugs, drink alcohol, having sex with a different person every night. I just want to forget and if they don't mind then I don't mind too. Don't forget that I am unbreakable. I am the famous rock star. I am Ashley fucking Davies.

I am on road months now. I had this Europe tour that my manager wanted me to. I haven't seen my sister for a year and a half and last time I talked with her was 5 months ago. Great sister I know. But I had other things to consider than that. But I missed my home. California. I missed the beach and the sun. Thank God this tour is coming to its end and I'll go back to my place. To my sanity. If they let me. And that's because when I come back my record company want me to release a new album that means that I have to write new songs and right now I juts want to sit down and do nothing. It's my every day fight with Ian. My manager.

"Ashley, not again. I told you before. Sony wants.." I stopped him because I knew what he would say. Blah blah blah..

"I know Ian. Don't. not again. I am so tired from all this."

"Ashley, you have a contract. You can't take it back. When we will be back you'll have to write some new songs. Your last album was a big success. All loved it."

"I know Ian. That's why you made me go to this tour obviously"

"Ashley, some times I can't figure you out. Really. Aren't you happy from your success?"

"Yeah yeah"

"I am serious. Aren't you?" am i? am I happy? I won't tell him that I am not. Remember that I am Ashley fucking Davies

"Of course I am Ian. Why wouldn't be? I have everything"

"That's what I mean Ashley. You have everything." No. I have nothing. I don't need the money to make me happy, or the big success. I want someone to share this things. But I don't do relationships. Yes. That's why I can't share this things with no one. Because I haven't find yet the one to share my life with.

"Tonight you can rest. Tomorrow is your last gig in France and then we can go back to California. Do whatever you like but don't stay up to late. I'll have a limo to take you from your hotel at 16.00. Ok?"

"Ok."

We were back to my hotel after a long trip. I just wanted to get rested but my thoughts didn't leave me. I needed to get out. Do something, or someone. I just wanted to let the energy I had inside go. I asked the reception were I could go to have a drink. Simple as that. I didn't get there with my limo or my bodyguards. Tonight I just wanted to be me. Just Ashley. Not the rock star Ashley.

A few meters away from my hotel was a club named Dekko. From what I heard it was a famous club here in Paris. I tried to pass as much invisible as possible. I sat down on a booth away from all the curious eyes. When I will want to make a move I will. For now I just want to drink.

As I am lost watching everyone to the dance hall I see a girl reaching my booth. I could see her checking me out for an hour or so. She wasn't bad at all. Brunette, with a killer body and green eyes.

"Excusez-moi?"

"Je ne parle pas de français. Je suis l'américain" I say in my French tone. Not that I can speak French but I know one or two phrases

"It's ok."

"You speak English?"

"Yes. I thought you were French though. That's why I talked to you in French" hello.. Does she know who I am? That's a new one.

"No, I am not. Do I look like French to you?"

"Well, you certainly look gorgeous"

"Same to you"

"Can I buy you a drink?"

"I am ok. Thank you"

"Pleaase.. one drink. I promise"

"Ok I suppose"

We sat in my booth talking for a while. I learned that she was a student studying here. She was from the States, Denver. Too cold for me but great if you wanna ski or something. Her name was Jessica and she was 23 years old. The strange thing in all this is not once she asked me if I was the Ashley Davies. I didn't tell her though. For once I wanted someone to like me because of me.

"So, Ashley. What you are doing here? So far away from home?" do I tell her what am I doing or not?

"Well, I am here for a business trip." It's not a complete lie.

"Nice. So do you like it here?"

"It's ok I think. I didn't have the time to check what Paris can offer"

"Too bad. Paris is the city of love" love? What a strange word..

"If you say so."

"Do you want to show you?" she is so kind, and so hot.. And I do believe that she wants me. So why not..

"Ok."

We took a walk near the river Seine. It wasn't chilly as it was summer. Actually it was perfect. If you had someone to care for it would be perfect.

"Ashley?"

"Yes?"

"Do you want to come to my place? It's near. We could have another drink"

"Show me the way beautiful.."

I knew were this was going. I was ready to have sex with a random girl in her house. Not strange. I've done it before. But I was on my ground terms.

When we reached her door she took me inside immediately. She started kissing me the moment we got in. Tearing apart the buttons of my shirt and cupping my breasts. She was moving very fast. I liked it. She reminded of myself. And I didn't care. I was going to have sex. That was what it mattered.

"I wanted to kiss you the moment I lay my eyes on you?"

"Don't talk"

I didn't want to talk. I just wanted to get laid.

We had sex to her floor. Yes. How strange. We were so hot for each other that we didn't take our time. She wanted me as much I wanted her. Not her as a person. Her as a fuck. Yes, welcome back Ashley fucking Davies.

When we finished I stood up to take my clothes and leave when she stopped me kind confused.

"Ashley? Were are you going?"

"I'm leaving."

"But why?"

"Jessica.. it was a great night and thank you"

"Please stay. Why are you leaving?"

"Because"

In a moment I saw her confused. From a moment she changed..

"Ash-ley? As Ashley Davies? Oh my God" I knew it. But why she had to recognize me now?

"Excuse me?"

"You are HER. You are Ashley Davies"

"Well.."

"I didn't recognize you at first. I knew you looked familiar but oh my God. You are her. I slept with Ashley Davies"

"Yeah, ok. I'm leaving."

"Noooo. Wait. Can you please sign.. wait where is it? Ahhh… never mind. Can you sign my underwear?"

I hate my life. I really do. Sometimes I want everything to stop.

I signed her 'underwear' and I took the exit as faster as I could. Let me tell you this. I won't fuck any girl for a year. Nooo… I couldn't. Maybe a month. I won't let my eyes check any girl. That's enough.

The next day came and the limo was down at 16.00 like Ian told me yesterday. I had to be earlier there for the rehearsals. The show would begin at 20.00 and then we would leave. Paris was ok, but I wanted to just go back.

"Well, thank you Paris for being here. I had a great time. I hope you liked the show. I'll see you again. Bye guys."

It was a great show indeed. A great finale to this fiasco.

"Ashley it was perfect. They still cry your name. You were amazing"

"Yeah, thank you Ian. When are we leaving?"

"The flight was canceled and I booked a flight for tomorrow. Sorry Ashley"

"Ian, what the fuck. I was prepared to leave today. Now I have to wait till tomorrow?"

"I'm sorry Ashley. I can't do anything about it. But you can have a bath and rest. The flight is tomorrow on 10.00"

I was so pissssed right now. But I suppose I could wait for some hours. I could take a babble bath a forget anything.

I was getting out of my limo and waiting for Ian to get out. I had my glasses on. Yeah, a rock star as I am couldn't stay away from wearing her glasses at night. But although wearing them and although I remember making a promise of not check out a girl again I couldn't look away from a gorgeous blond in the reception. I could see her back and little of her profile. When I saw her I felt something inside. Like something pinched me. I was walking slowly so I could hear her voice or what they were saying.

"Ok. Mrs Carlin. They will be up in a few"

"Thank you"

That what I caught. Her last name. Carlin. The gorgeous blond last name was Carlin. I was now there looking some postcards the hotel had trying to take look on her. When she turned her face we looked each other for a moment and she left. She had the most beautiful blue eyes I have ever seen. It was like I was seeing an angel. I think my heart stopped. What is it that they call it here? 'Love at first sight'.

Before I remember again who I was she was gone. When she left? I was so in my world that I didn't catch her. May I could ask the reception.

"Excuse me? Can I ask you something?"

"Of course Ms Davies"

"The woman that was here a minute ago, could you please tell me her name or her room?"

"I'm sorry Ms Davies but I can't give you that kind of information."

"You don't know who I am?"

"Of course I do Ms Davies, but I can't help you on this"

Fuck. So now? What am I doing? Try to knock every fucking door of this hotel? Stalker much? _Yes you are _

Besides I don't know if she is gay or something. Probably she is straight. She is fucking straight and I want to see her again. Maybe if I can stay down here and wait for her.. No..

I didn't stay down waiting for her to come. I didn't knock each and every room of this hotel. I just went to my room and dreamt of her. At least now I know that I am not the hurtless bitch everyone tells me that I am. I think I fall in love with someone that I only know her last name. And I don't know if I ever see again…

* * *

**TBC**

**Next chapter… Any thoughts? Oh , I have some.. Wait till tomorrow. If you liked this first chapter please review. I wanna know what you think..**

**R&R**

**xx**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi guys!! Thank you so much for your instant response to this story!!! For those who read my stories for the first time know that I update often!! You don't have to wait a week or two for a new update!!! Maybe two days or three!! So enjoy the new chapter!!**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 2**

I couldn't rest last night. I couldn't take the blond girl out of my head. This is very frustrating. I am stacked with a girl that I didn't have the chance to speak to. Damn girl of the reception. If she could tell me where her room was.. _What? Would I go there and knock her door out of the blue?_ Probably no, but I could send her something. I don't know. All I know is that I am flying back to California today and I won't see her again. Why did my flight have to be canceled? Why?

I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't hear the door. I had black circles down my eyes. I haven't slept. I tried, but I couldn't.

"I'm coming. Wait" very persistent whoever is. Who the fuck is it..

"Ashley? Open the door" Ian..

"What is it Ian?"

"Are you serious? I tried to call you so many times and you didn't pick it up. Where were you?"

"I was here. Maybe the battery was off. So? What is it?"

"Ashley, for God shakes! It's 8.00. We have to be at the airport in less than an hour. Are you ready?"

Oh, my God. It was already 8.00? I had other things to think obviously or someone particular..

"I'll be down in 5. Ok? Go sown and wait for me"

"Don't be late. I mean it"

I had a quick shower and did my make up. Yes, I said in 5 minutes. Say 30 and you will be more accurate. Ian will be so pissed right now.

"Ashley with you I think that every year I am not a year older. With you every fucking year I am five years older. Are you ready now? We have to leave"

"One moment and I promise you we leave. Ok?"

"I'm counting"

I had to make another try. It was a different person in the reception. Maybe will be my lucky day..

"Excuse me? Can I ask you something?" and I give him my bigger and best smile.

"Of course Ms Davies. Everything"

"Can you please tell me if there is a Mrs Carlin here?"

"Let me check" did that fucking receptionist had to be here last night? This guy is much better

"Ms Davies, there was a Mrs Carlin but she checked out this morning."

"FUCK FUCK FUCK" oh I said it that aloud? Yes probably, because this guys is looking me really strange. "I'm sorry. It's not you. Thank you"

"I hope I helped you."

"If you were working last night you would be a much better help. But thank you regardless"

"My pleasure Ms Davies"

"Ashley, come on. We have to leave."

In our way to the airport I was quiet. I didn't want to talk to anyone. My mind was on her. How on earth will I find her again? I know her last name but probably she will be married or something. She called her Mrs.. Fuck.. Fuck Fuck.

"Ashley, what's the matter? Are you ok?"

"I'm ok Ian. I'm just great"

"In less than five minutes we will be at the airport. I booked sits in business class of course"

"Yeah yeah. Whatever"

"Really, sometimes I can't figure you out"

"I didn't ask you to."

Yeah, I'm a bitch. I know. But that's my protection from getting attach with someone.

Walking to have our check in I swear I saw a blond one like Carlin. Before I realize if what I saw was real or not the blond was out of sight. My mind plays games with me or I am so obsessed with this girl. I have to get it over. I will never see her again.

"Ashley? What is it?" If he asks me one more time if I am ok, or how I feel I think that I'll hit him on his nuts.

"Nothing. Can we go?"

"Yes, I have the tickets. Let's go"

"_Passengers of Flight 452 to California should aboard"_

"Ashley this is us. Do you have your passport?"

"Ian, what am I? A child? Jesus. Of course I have it. I travel a lot thank you"

"I'm just saying.."

"Don't.."

"Ok, whatever"

"Hello, Ms Davies. Welcome to our flight. May you have a pleasant trip. Whatever you want you can call for me. I'm Jane"

"Thank you Jane."

"My pleasure"

Yes, here we are again. The flirting, the almosts. Not this time. If it were for any other time I would take this Jane girl and have my way with her in this plane toilet. But not this time..

We were flying for an hour now. I was so bored that I wanted to take a walk. If it was someone else in my shoes, famous like me I mean, he or she wouldn't do it. Imagine you are in the same plane with Brand Pitt and he walks right next to you. Yes, that's what I think. I shouldn't but I need to.

"Ashley? Where are you going?"

"To the ladies room"

"There is bathroom here you know. You don't have to go to third class."

"I know Ian. I want to stretch a little."

"Ashley…"

"I'm going Ian.."

Of course I had my glasses on and my favorite jockey hut. Not the best cover but it should do. As I walking I hear some people talking to each other "Is this Ashley Davies?" "She looks like her, Ashley Davies", "mom can I ask her an autograph?"

My goal was to reach the ladies room. Once I got inside I locked the door and washed my face. 'Ashley, are you happy?' I remember Ian's question. Am I? Sometimes I am. I do what I wanted to like ever. But some other times I'm just tired. I just wanna sit to my balcony and watch the sea.

_Knock Knock_

"Just a moment. I'm coming out in a minute" Great. I wish I knew where I would sign this time

I fix my hair, put my jockey hut and open the door. Oh, fuck me right now… There is no way…

"Ehm… it's free.. you can go now.." My blond goddess. My blond girl from Paris. Carlin. I stare her and I think that the cat ate my tongue. She is standing here looking at me and I can't even pronounce my name. She is extremely beautiful. If I thought she was beautiful when I saw her from far away imagine what I am thinking right now..

"Actually.. I don't have to go. I just wanted to see you" WHAT? She just said what I think she said? Nah.. I hear things.. Yes, that it is.. I'm crazy.. "Does the cat ate your tongue?"

"Ehm.. No.. no.. of course not"

"I didn't think that THE Ashley Davies couldn't speak"

"Believe me. I do speak, I just .. I am…"

"Yes?"

"Nah.. forget it."

"I do believe we met each other yesterday. We were staying in the same hotel"

"Yes, we did. You were in the reception"

"So you were"

I make a conversation in the toilet with the girl of my dreams. What a nice way to flirt. Don't you think?

"It's a shame you know. You know me and I don't remember hearing your name"

"That's because I never told you"

"Care to share?"

"Spencer. Spencer Carlin. Nice to meet you" she said and gave me her hand to shake it. It was so soft. I think I held it more than I should.

"Ahm.. nice to meet you Spencer Carlin"

As much as I don't want to leave her, making a conversation right here it's not ok.

"Where are you sitting?"

"Third class. I suppose you are in first class?"

"Yes. Would you like to join me? To continue our talk"

"Well.. I don't know"

"Please? I promise. I don't bite"

"Only for a while. Ok?"

"Of course"

When we reach first class I see Ian sleeping. If Spencer is here so Ian has to go to Spencer's sit.

"Ian? Ian?"

"Don't.."

"Ian wake up.."

"What?"

"Ian, you have to go to third class"

"WHAT? Why?"

"Because" when he is fully awake he can see that I have some beautiful company with me.

"No, Ashley"

"Ian, if you don't get up right now…"

"Ashley, it's ok. I can go back"

"No, Spencer. He will. Ian if you don't get up in less than a minute forget being a manager of mine and forget you ever find a job again" Bitch enough? Yeah, I am. But I have a good reason this time

"Ok. Jeez. You are such a bitch sometimes Ashley"

"Thank you. Now leave"

He left and I could hear him swearing. He knows he loves me.

"Ashley, you shouldn't. It's ok"

"No, No. He is ok. He is used to"

"Are you sure? I don't want to make a fuse"

"You wouldn't. Now where were we?"

"I believe we introduced ourselves"

"Yes, I remember. Spencer is it?" I said trying to seem that I forgot her name. But she knew I was making a joke

"Har har"

"So.. Spencer.. What was it that made you come to Paris?" it's not my fault that I am curious. My mind travels to 'Mrs'. I wish she could tell me. For what I know is that she is flirting with me. So maybe she is gay? Maybe? I hope..

"Well.. I had a conference there"

"Conference?"

"A conference about pediatrics. I am a pediatrician"

"How nice. You love kids so much ha?"

"Very. I always wanted to be a pediatrician. My mom is a surgeon."

"You walked your mother's steps?"

"So how about you rock star?"

"Well you know about me."

"No, I don't. I want you to tell me" that was the first time that someone asked me about me. It was the first time I had a civil talk. And I loved it..

"Well.. where to start.. My father was a famous rock star. Raife Davies. But he is dead now."

"I'm sorry Ashley"

"Nah, it doesn't matter. I was 16 when he died."

"Either way, he was your dad"

"I haven't had the chance of seeing him every day. Maybe two days a year"

"That's so sad. But you loved him though."

"Yes, I loved him very much. That's why I wanted to sing. I feel more close to him"

"You do have a beautiful voice Ashley." I think that I'm red like a tomato now. How she can do this?

"Th-ank you..?"

"You do know that you have a beautiful voice. Don't you?"

"That's what everyone says"

"Do you have someone special in your life?" she asked me like she wanted to know if I was having a boyfriend or maybe a girlfriend

"I have two special people in my life"

"Oh.."

"My sister Kyla and my best friend Aiden" I believe she liked my answer because she has a big smile on her face right now "What about you Spencer? Do you have someone special?"

"Well.." I see she is playing with her hands like she doesn't know what to say

"It's ok. If you don't want to tell"

"No. It's not that. I want to"

"But really.. if you don't.." before I finish she put her hand on my knee. What a strange feeling. I like it where it is.

"I want to. Well.. as I told you before I was in Paris for a congress and … to discuss about divorcing with my husband" I knew it. She was straight and married. WHAT? Did she say divorce? I'm jumping inside…

"Well.. I'm sorry?"

"No.. It's ok. I got over it. This wedding shouldn't start from the beginning"

"So.. I'm sorry for asking.. but then why you married the guy?"

"Long story. Believe me."

"We have almost 10 hours left. So if you want to.."

She begun talking and I was more than willing to hear what she should say..

* * *

**TBC**

**Did you like it? If I don't go out tonight because it's raining maybe I'll have another update!! If you liked it or not I would like to hear your thoughts..**

**R&R**

**xx**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

**

* * *

  
**

Spencer and I talked for almost 5 hours. If you ask me I feel that it was just for 5 minutes. When I asked her about her marriage I didn't know if it was right but nevertheless she answered me. I was curious why she married a guy when obviously I could see her flirting with me. Not that I mind or anything. I'm just saying. I got my answer though and I couldn't be happier…

"Why did you marry him Spencer?"

"Were to start? Well.. why I married Bob? I ask this question to myself sometimes Ashley."

"And?"

"You see.. Oh my God. I'm going to tell you my life story and I don't even know you."

"If you don't want to you don't have to" but I did want for her to tell me

"Do you know what it is strange? That I feel like I know you. Like I want to share things with you."

"I feel the same Spencer."

"Do you want to know why I married Bob? Because of my mother."

"I thought you were besties with her."

"Not exactly. You see the thing is that I always knew that I was feeling something more with girls than boys but I didn't give so much credit. I was young and I thought that it was natural." Is she gay? Can I have this happy dance now?

"I was sure when I was 16 though. That's when I fell in love with a girl and she fell in love with me. We were unseperate. We did everything together. She was my first and I was hers." why I am feeling jealous now? It's not ok to feel jealous of her.. Nah.. it was years ago..

"Until one day my mother caught us. That's when my world crushed. I thought I was going to die. I hate her so very much. She moved us out and I couldn't do anything about it. I tried to keep in touch with her but states apart it was difficult. I lost her and somehow I lost myself. I did what my mother wanted just because I didn't care anymore. I graduated from high school and I moved out to California. That's when I met Bob. We were classmates. He was a very good guy. He was pleasant, humorous, and handsome. He had the package if you know what I mean. So I tried to let behind what I felt and got in a relationship with him. I forgot about what I wanted and I focused of what it was right."

"It was three years ago that Bob propose me. When I told my mom she was so happy. She imagined that day since I was 5." That's when I interrupted her. I knew it was something she wanted to tell me but..

"I'm sorry Spencer, but if you didn't want to be with Bob then why you continued to be with him?"

"I was the perfect daughter and I wanted for my parents to be happy, although I wasn't. I thought that maybe this whole gay thing was a phase after all"

"Was it though?"

"No. It wasn't a phase. And I knew it the moment I married Bob. While being in church I was thinking that Bob wasn't Bob. I was thinking that it was a girl that I loved very much."

"Since you knew it from the beginning, then why you stayed with him? Really I can't understand it."

"Maybe I will sound selfish but I wanted something from him that no woman could ever give me. A child. When I got pregnant I knew that Bob was bad news"

"WOW" I was speechless. Not only she was married with a man, when clearly she was gay but she was a mother too?

"Ashley?"

"…."

"Ashley did I shocked you?"

"I.. do-n't.. know what to say"

"You think I'm cruel?"

"Of course not Spencer. Of course not. Remember? I'm the bitch here. Not you."

"You are not a bitch Ashley. You are the most loving person I ever met" blushing again..

"So.. you have a child?"

"A baby girl. Her name is Cristine"

"I bet she is beautiful as her mother"

"We have the same colors."

"Then she is an angel. Like you"

"Aren't you disgusted or anything? After what I told you?"

"I could never be disgusted of you. Never. You made some bad choices. Everyone made some bad choices in the past. Even I did"

"But you knew who you are."

"Spencer, believe me. I had my phases too. Remember Aiden? We were together in high school. That's when I knew that being with him it was a mistake and I needed some girl love"

"You've been with men?" she was confused. And if I didn't know I would say she was jealous? Nah.. She couldn't

"I've been with 3 men my whole life. I told you before. I love women. I couldn't stay away from them. So let me ask you again. Do you have a special person in your life?"

"Christine is my special person. So.. besides Christine no. I don't have someone. And as I told you I'm recently divorced"

"That is very good in so many ways Spencer"

"Yeah.. how so?"

"Because it means that you are single."

"And that is good.. because?"

"You are free now. You can do whatever you like. Find someone special in more personal ways"

"I think that I have someone in mind.."

"Good"

The hours passed so fast and without knowing we were already in California. Ian was still in third class and if I know him he is very pissed. I learned so many things about Spencer and I'm sure I wanted to learn more. Now that I knew I wouldn't let her go away. I knew she was different from all the other girls. I knew it when I saw her for the first time down in the reception. No.. Spencer Carlin would no leave so easy from me.

"We are here at last. I can't believe we let your manager so many hours in my sit."

"Don't worry about it"

"Well.. I believe that is a goodbye?"

"It's a see you soon gorgeous girl. Give me your phone" she was hesitant but she gave it to me after all.

"Now.. you have my number. Push 'Rock Star' and I'll be on the other line."

"Rock star?"

"That's what I am. Don't I?"

"You are more than this Ashley"

"You give a call. Whenever. It was nice meeting you Spencer Carlin"

"It was my pleasure Ashley Davies" I took her hand and I bent to kiss it. Very Romeo don't you think? But she was clearly my Juliet. I hope she would call.

Although I had a 12 hour flight I was definitely not tired. I can't say the same for Ian though. He was so mad, pissed and everything that has to do with anger issues. But I don't care at all. I spent the most wonderful hours in my whole life just speaking with Spencer and I didn't even think of fucking her against the door of the plane's restrooms. Well, maybe one or three times but it was pure. She wasn't just a random fuck. She wasn't just a random girl I met somewhere. She was special. And if she asked me again if I had someone special in my life this time I would say yes. Because I think that I found my special person.

I was ready to fall asleep after a long bath I took when I heard my phone bussing. I thought of not answering it at first in case it was Ian and wanted something but I decided against and thank God I did. I didn't know the number but it was a California number.

"Hello?"

"_Hi"_

"Hi" I knew it was her. I could never forget her voice.

"_I hope I didn't wake you up or something"_

"Of course not. Actually I was ready to go to sleep."

"_I'm sorry. Do you want to.."_

"No. I'm actually very happy that you called"

"_I didn't know if I should. But I couldn't resist. I really hoped you gave me the right number."_

"Why wouldn't I?"

"_One, because you are famous and two.. because you are famous"_

"That's not a reason you know"

"_Maybe I'm a stalker. You never know"_

"I would be very happy if you stalked me"

"_Really?"_

"Of course. How is Christine? I bet you missed her and she missed her mommy"

"_When I was in Paris I left her with my brother and I didn't want to wake her up. But I was there till half an hour ago just watching her sleep"_

"Do you have to go to work tomorrow?"

"_Actually no. No till the day after tomorrow"_

"What do you think of meeting me for lunch?"

"_Well.. I don't know. Don't you afraid of seeing us together? The Ashley Davies have a lunch rendezvous with some blond?"_

"We'll find something. I'll come and pick you up at around 12.30?"

"_Ok. But I have to be back at 15.00 because it's when Christine is coming back from the day care"_

"It's a date Spencer Carlin. See you tomorrow"

"_It's a date Ashley Davies. Can't wait"_

_

* * *

  
_

**TBC**

**That was my third chapter.. Tomorrow another one!**

**R&R**

**xx**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guys!! Here is the new chapter as I promised! I hope you like it as well! Enjoy!**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 4**

Spencer called me. Spencer just called me. I can't think. I can't speak. We have a date tomorrow. Well not a _date date _but I hope it's a date. Now I'm mumbling.. Either way I'm going to see her. I can't get out of my head what she told me yesterday. For once she was married and now divorced, thank God, and she has a little daughter. I was never so keen with having a child of my own. I never thought about it. It's not that I don't like them. I love them but all this process being pregnant and bringing another life into this world, it's kind of something nah.. But hearing Spencer about her daughter it's just did something inside me. I hope I can meet her someday. I'm sure she will look like her mother. Beautiful.. I'm getting soppy now. If someone could see me they would say that I am possessed or something. But what I feel when I talk with Spencer it's a feeling I never had. She does things to me.

My phone rings again and I hope it's Spencer but it's not. I forgot to call Kyla to tell her that I'm back one piece.

"Hey Kyla"

"Ashley, you are back?"

"Yes, I am back"

"You didn't call"

"I'm sorry Kyla but I arrived late and then I took a long bath and then.."

"You will never gonna change Ashley. You are thinking always yourself"

"What? Why you are saying this Kyla?"

"Because it's the truth Ashley. You don't seem to care about anything or anyone"

"Excuse me? Did you call to just yell at me?"

"I called to see if you are back and talk with you"

"But you keep yelling at me"

"Whatever"

"Exactly"

"How was your tour?"

"Boring. I missed my home"

"We missed you too"

"I never said I missed you"

"You know you love me big sis"

"Yeah yeah"

"So did you have fun there?"

"Oh Kyla.. you will never believe me when I'm gonna say to you that I think I fell in love with someone"

"YOU WHAT???"

"Could you please don't yell in my ear. I need my ears so I can sing you know"

"You what?? No way. You found someone you like?? I need to meet her. She must be something"

"She is.."

And I told her about Spencer and everything. She was in shock. She knew me very well and I loved her about that. We have the typical sister bonding. I yell she yells back at me but we sure love each other and she is my best friend. I told her that I would meet Spencer tomorrow and she told me that she wanted to come to the same place so she can see her. Of course I refused and told her that if I saw her somewhere near I would kill her. Not literally but whatever..

When I think about it and whatever happened this day it's still like dreaming. I never thought that I would find someone that I like. In my whole 26 years of existence I remember always having fun and playing with others emotions. Kyla was right though. I always think of myself. I'm not the one of commitments. I'm not the one who does relationships. Beside Aiden I never had a true relationship. I broke some hearts on the way.. I taught myself not to care.. But after the day I met Spencer I found myself caring. Caring for her in more than one ways.. Tomorrow seems so far away

**

Although I'm not a morning person, I woke up at 7.00 today. I was so anxious of meeting Spencer and so nervous. Ashley Davies nervous? About meeting a girl? There is definitely changing something inside me.

I tool a lot of hour just to find the perfect outfit to wear. Nothing seemed fitting though. I have a huge room of clothing and I can't find anything to wear. Nice. How I am going to meet her. Naked? Yeah that wouldn't pull all the attention on me. No naked it's not the right outfit.

Finally I found something to wear. A mini jean skirt with a Rolling stones stamp shirt. Black hills and my favorite necklace. My silver Guess chain with the heart. I had my hair half up half down in loose curls. I did the perfect make up and I was ready. I took a last look on myself and I left to go pick Spencer. Her home isn't too far away from mine. A half way road. I juts have to put it on my pros list of Spencer.. Not that I have one..

Her home is like home. With a yard outside where toys and a tricycle are lay down. It's not a big one but it looks perfect. It where Spencer would live. I take one final look on myself and I get out so to knock her door. I can't wait to see her..

"I'm coming.. Just a sec" I heard her voice from inside. I think I missed her voice already.. "Hey"

"Hi.. You are beautiful today" she was beautiful. She was wearing a sundress with flip flops. Her hair were down straight and her make up simple just to bring out her angel characteristics

"Same to you" I saw her checking me out. I chose the right outfit. Score.

"Are you ready?"

"Yes, I am. Where are we going?"

"Surprise"

"Oh come on. Tell me. Maybe I am not dressed suitable"

"You are gorgeous"

"Thank you. Now can you please tell me?"

"Nope. You will see when we get there. It's not far"

She was curious by I wouldn't fall on her adorable pout. I was almost to say that we would go on the beach. My favorite place of all. And I thought that it wouldn't be ok for her if some paparazzi took a photograph of us. She has Christine and she is a pediatrician after all. I wouldn't want to bring that to her.

When we were almost there I saw her she knew were we were going.

"Ashley? The beach?"

"Yes, you don't like?"

"But you said of lunch"

"Who told you that we won't eat?"

"Ha?"

"Oh, Spencer.. You are so cute"

Well bringing her to my favorite place it means that I know this place quit well. There is a man here who makes the best hot dogs ever. I want to see her expression though.

"Here we are. What would you like to it milady?"

"I'm sorry?"

"I said we would meet for lunch. So.. do you want your hot dog with everything or ketsap and mustard. I prefer with everything. It tastes really good"

"You are something Ashley Davies. I hope you already know that"

"That what I've been told. Thank you"

"I'll have whatever you'll have"

"Nice.. John.. Two as I like them"

"_Right away Ms Davies"_

"You know him?"

"Yes, I come here a lot. It's my favorite place"

"You brought me on your favorite place?"

"Cheesy I know but.." I didn't finish my sentence because two of her fingers were in my lips stopping me.

"It's perfect. I like it." _As I liked your hands touching my lips_

We sat there eating our hot dogs and not saying anything. I could just stay there and looking at her. I would please just by looking at her..

"It's the perfect lunch date I ever had Ashley. Thank you"

"My pleasure. I really hoped you liked it"

"I could never believe that you are so simple.."

"What do you mean?"

"Well.. you are the famous Rock Star Ashley Davies who don't give a damn for anything and now I'm sitting here with you and all I can see is just you. Not THE Ashley Davies that everyone knows but you. Just Ashley"

I'm not going to say that I liked that Spencer knew who I was. I'm sure she read things about me but she told me something that I wanted to hear from someone for a while now. It was always the Rock Star and not me. But Spencer liked me for who I was not the celebrity bitchy me.

"Well.. iamlikethatonlywithyou" I said really fast that Spencer looked at me strange..

"What did you say?" why I feel like this in front of her? _Because you like her.._

"I said that I'm like that only with you"

"Really?"

"Yes, Spencer. I won't say that I'm perfect. I'm not. And I won't say that I treated people nice. Because I didn't and believe me I still do. But.. you really make me better.. and I'm sorry if it curious to you or even strange but it is how I feel. I felt something inside me skip when I saw you. I'm sorry for telling you this and you may find me strange again and if you don't want…"

"Ashley.. stop. You are mumbling again."

"Sorry"

"Don't be. Well to tell you the truth I feel how you feel. And it's ok. Believe me. Because the moment I saw you down in the reception I felt the same. But you being you I could never… I didn't think that I would ever see you again.. but when I saw you in the plane I did something that I would never do ever. I made the first move. I just wanted to speak to you. I saw how you looked at me at the reception so I hoped.. and the we talked and I felt nice. Like I knew you somehow."

"Well.. I asked about you at the reception and that fucking girl didn't tell me where your room was. I wanted to see you again."

"You did?"

"Of course. And I did the same the next day but the receptionist told me you checked out. I just knew that I had to found you. And I will tell you a secret. I heard your last name"

"When?"

"That night you were talking with the fucking receptionist"

"Aha.. so you knew…"

"hey.. You knew who I was.."

"True"

"Soo?"

"Sooo what?"

"Well, I know that I like you.."

"I like you too.."

"Would you like to go on a date with me some time again?"

"I would love to"

"Perfect"

"Perfect" we just looked at each other and I wanted to kiss her so much. So much that I was biting my lip and I think I tasted some blood. I knew she wanted to do the same but I think that we both thought that it was too fast. We just said 'I like you' to each other. That is something. And now we are going on a second date. I had rush things before.. Now I want to go slow. I could wait as long as I knew she was mine..

"I believe it's time to take you home. Christine will be back in an hour"

"Yes.. how fast the hour goes when you are having the best date"

"Best date?"

"The bestest"

"I'm glad you liked it."

"I did and I can't wait for our second"

"Me too"

I took her by her hand and guide us to my car. I didn't want to separate from her but we had to. Spencer is a mother of a 2 year old little girl. And I know she missed her daughter very much. I left her and I watched as she was going inside her house. She waved at me and the she was gone. I think I fell so fast for her. Like really fast.. I already miss her..

Driving back to my house I sensed my cell buzzing. I couldn't see who it was because I was driving. When I stopped to a red light I saw I had a message from Spencer..

_I really had the best day of my life. Thank you rock star.. Spencer xx_

Yes, I have a big smile right now. Like huge.. I couldn't right away. In the next red light I did though..

_It was my best too. Can't wait to see you again gorgeous.. Ashley xx_

_

* * *

  
_

**TBC**

**Well did you like it?? I think of writing Spence's POV also. Tell me what you think!! Thank you so much for your reviews. It makes me really happy that you like this story.. So thank you guys so much…**

**R &R**

**xx**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

It is over a week since my date with Spencer. We talk almost every day on the phone and I wouldn't want it any other way. We couldn't meet for our second date because of our schedules and let me say that I don't like my job right now. Ian was so persistent. I had to do some meetings with the producers.. Blah blah… He is driving me crazy and not in a good way. From the other hand Spencer had to do late shifts at the hospital. So we only talked on the phone. That was something from nothing.. But I wanted so much to see her.. I told her one day that I would send her a photo of mine so we won't forget me and she thought I was kidding. I did send her my photo. One with me smiling.. She told me that she could never forget about me because I am that kind of person that it's difficult to forget. That is a good thing I suppose.

I am on a meeting again. They told me that they wanted to release a new album of mine and it was time for me to write new songs and everything. It's not that I don't like it but I want some Ashley time. I never thought that a day would come that I would want to stop being the rock star and stay behind the scene. When I met Spencer I knew that I wanted to be the Ashley when I am with her. I want to stop being the Ashley who sleeps with whoever, who does drugs just to feel something, who drinks just to forget.. I found something that I care and I only hope for the day that this someone, Spencer, will be mine to keep.

Like reading my thoughts Spencer called me. I was still on the meeting when I saw she was calling me and I needed to hear her. They wouldn't like it that …

"I'm sorry, but I have to take this.."

"Ashley we are on a meeting.." Ian said looking at me like saying 'What the fuck are you doing?'

"It's really important. I'll be back in a few"

"Hey you.. I missed you.."

"Hey.. I had a break and I thought of calling you. Did I interrupt anything?"

"I am on a meeting where I'm so fucking bored.. Thank God you called me.. I was thinking of you.."

"Yeah..? What were you thinking of me?"

"Ah.. I can't tell you.. All naughty thoughts.." I was teasing her. I always did that when I was talking to her. There was definitely a sexual attraction in both of us"

"Aha.. I see.. so I can't tell you mine then.."

"Does Dr. Carlin has naughty thoughts about Ashley Davies?"

"I didn't say they were naughty.."

"But you dreamt about me.."

"Maybe.."

"You know you dreamt about me.." I could sense that she was smiling. Actually I knew that she was smiling because I came to know her so very well too fast. "Soo Dr. Carlin when are you finishing your shift?"

"Well in about an hour.. I had a night shift. So I think of going back home, have a long bath and rest. Christine will be back in three hours"

"Well you do that. You need to rest."

"When am I gonna see you again? It's been.. I don't know.. ages when I saw you?"

"You want to see me?"

"Of course I want to see you. I missed your smile"

"And I missed your eyes"

"_Ms Carlin__ they need you on the ER" _I heard someone call her. I knew she had to leave me for now…

"Ash? I'm sorry but I have to go.. I promise to call you when I come home. Ok?"

"Ok"

"Bye"

'Bye beautiful girl' I said when we closed the phone. Now I had to go to this boring meeting and I missed Spencer already..

I really have it hard with her. I'm falling more and more every day and is difficult. It is difficult because she is a very good pediatrician and she is a very good mom. A very good single mom. That means that when she has a free time she spends it with her daughter. And I like that, I do. I could never tell her to come and see me when I know that Christine needs her. She is very lucky that she has her brother Glen near to help her. When Spencer came here to study her brother was already here with a scholarship to play basketball. Because of an accident he had though he never made to NBA and now he is coaching to a local high school. Yes, I almost know everything about Spencer..

To be true I thought about one day to call her and tell her to come by my place but after thinking it again I didn't say anything. It was already late and I wouldn't want Christine to wake up and look for her mother. So for now we make plans to see each other when Christine is on day care.

It's hard when you want to see the person you care and you can't. But we said last night when we talked that this Saturday would be perfect. Glen wants to take Christine in Disneyland as a good uncle he is and believe me, I'm not saying that in a bad way or anything but I'm so thrilled. Like I'm jumping.. I'm going to see Spencer again.. It's been so long..

**

"Hey you.. are you ready for our date?"

"If you don't hang up the phone Ash I won't be ready when you come to peak me up" ah yeah.. we begun to shorten our names.. How I love it when she calls me like that.. It makes feel more.. more.. I don't know.. more me I think.. Much closer to her..

"You are a drama queen you know.."

"No you are and now you have to hang up so I can dress. Ok?"

"But you are beautiful."

"Asshh.. please"

"Ok ok. I'm hanging up. I'll be there in half an hour"

"Ok, I'll be waiting"

"Bye Spence.."

"Bye Ash.."

I was there in less than a half an hour. I was so anxious that I couldn't stay at home.. I just wanted to see her again..

"You are here earlier you know.."

"I know.. But I wanted to see you?"

"You are so very lucky that I know you and I was ready fifteen minutes before you came"

"You know me so well Spence"

"You are beautiful"

"I could say the same for you. But I always look beautiful and sexy and hot.."

"Egomaniac maybe?"

"But I'm your egomaniac.."

"Come on egomaniac.."

"Where are we going?" today I let Spencer to choose where we would go. I don't care where we will go unless she is with me..

"You'll see.. Now drive"

"Your wish my command"

Spencer drove me to this place that from now on I will call paradise. I live here so long and I didn't know this place. It's a little park with a little lake inside and a bridge. There are benches where old people are sitting next to each other and little kids playing.. It's almost like the place where Julia Roberts and Hugh Grad sitting next to each other holding by their hands. Notting Hill. What a great movie.. But my place has a lake too. Ha ha. Much better..

"Spence I love it. I never knew there was a place like this.."

"It's my favorite place. I like coming here with Christine." Oh she brought me here. Her favorite place where she comes with her daughter.

"It's perfect. It's like a paradise."

"I know.. I like it that you like it"

"I missed you Spence.." I said and I took a hold of her hand. How I missed her touch.

"I missed you too. Thank God you send me that photo of you. You know I still have it"

"You do?"

"Of course. And I look at it every day and every night. Whenever I'm thinking of you"

"So you are thinking of me?"

"What do you think?"

"That you do?"

"You are not sure?"

"I hope that you do because I think about you a whole lot Spence. I can't think anything but you."

"I'm glad." Now she touches my hand and caressing it with her thumb. I want to kiss her so much right now. But..

"Spence?"

"Mmmm?"

"Spence.. I wanna kiss you so much right now.."

"What is stopping you?" and that was what I needed. The green light. I could kiss her and I would make it worth it. I gently touched her lips at first kissing her softly on her upper lip and then her bottom tracing my tongue just a little to her bottom lip. She opened her mouth the same time I opened mine and then it's where our tongues met. It was so sensual. It was everything I imagined to be. Kissing Spencer send me out of this place. We kissed for I don't know how long when we stopped just to take a breath. She was intoxicating and I needed her..

"WOW"

"Why you had to wait till now to kiss me Ash?"

"I wanted to when we had our first date but I thought that maybe it was too soon for you. I didn't want to pressure you or anything?"

"What if I tell you that I wanted to kiss you when I saw you on that plane?"

"Are you kidding me?"

"Nope. I wanted to they moment I saw you. You keep pulling me to you like a magnet."

I just lay my forehead touching hers and taking her intoxicating scent in me. I let my hand fall on her back touching her just a little. She did the same to me. We looked each other in each other eyes and we kissed again. Now that I tasted how it feels to kiss Spencer I don't know if I can be so long away from her.

"Spence, I like you. I want you. I want to be with you. It's something I never left before. You make feel things, things I never thought I could feel.."

"Oh, Ash.. I want you too. I wanted you from the beginning. When I saw those beautiful chocolate brown eyes of you.."

"I know I want you and you know you want me.. Soo?"

"I think that after kissing you I made my point.."

"You mean that you want to be with me? Like be with me? Like holding hands and kissing and stuff?"

"I want to be with you, kissing you, holding your hand and stuff.."

"Spence what about Christine? What if some paparazzi see us and take a photograph of you?"

"Well, would you mind if we didn't go to crowded places at first?"

"I wouldn't mind at all. Even if I haven't met Christine I want you to know that I care for her. I wouldn't put your daughter to the shit I have to put up with every day"

"I know Ash.. For now we could meet like here or the beach that you love so much or at your house" although I knew she meant whatever she said her last word made me feel sad. She didn't want me to come to her place? I didn't have to feel like that way. It was too soon for her. She had a daughter to think about. I from the other part was alone. She could come to my place and we could hang out. Yeah, I won't think about it. Whenever the time comes she will tell me to come to her place and maybe I can meet Christine too.

"Ok.. So you and I are together together?"

"We are definitely together together."

"So I can kiss you whenever I want and have naughty thoughts of you?"

"Ash.. you had naughty thoughts about me before we kiss. So what stopping you now?"

"Well you are right."

"I'm always right"

"And then you say that I am the egomaniac"

"What can I say.. Having Ashley Davies for a girlfriend changed me"

"ha ha. You wish babe"

Yeah.. The second date? Much better than the first. Not only I kissed Spencer and we are together. She is my girlfriend. SHE is my girlfriend. I never had a girlfriend and although I had many first times I'm glad Spencer is my best first time..

* * *

**TBC**

**I brought them together. I couldn't let them not be girlfriends. I love them so much for them to wait. Hope you like it  
**

**R&R**

**xx**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey guys.. , FF couldn't upload my documents. I'm really sorry you had to wait. But know that I was keep writing..**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 6**

**Spencer's POV**

Falling in love.. I couldn't believe that I was going to fall in love again and with a woman. After my first and only girlfriend back in high school I thought I would never fall in love again. But watch me now. I am so in love with Ashley, Ashley Davies for God shakes. I never saw this coming. I knew about her.. I even liked her as a singer. She has an incredible voice.

I always read about her life. It was a very wild life let me say. I knew it before she confessed that to me. But it's something to read about her and other thing when the same person is telling you that what you read is true. It's not that I don't like her the same. Actually I like her even more because she had the guts to tell me herself. When she is with me is a different person and I do believe that it's the true Ashley.

Being the 'bitch' everyone tells her she is, is something that was built by her only to protect herself. Ashley was alone almost all her life. Her father was a famous rock star and her mother didn't care about her. I suppose that's how the rich people love. After her dad's dead Kyla, her sister, came to her life. It was her father's other child. It was something that sent her out of place. But with baby steps they built their relationship and now they are best sisters and best friends. She told me she has noone than her sister and Aiden. And now me..

I am afraid that I'm falling so fast with her. Actually I knew I would fall for her after our meeting on the plane. I knew when I saw her that I needed to talk to her. I never did this before. I am not an outgoing person. But when I saw her in that reception and after seeing her on that plane I just had the urge to talk to her. I knew maybe she wanted the same because I saw her how she looked at me when our eyes met for the first time. That moment I knew that I was lost..

I called her the same night and the next day we met. She was amazing, beautiful, and simple. I didn't know that she could be like this. If I liked her before knowing she was a 'bitch', a word that I don't like saying, when I saw inside of her, when she opened her heart in me, I fell for her.. We talked every day on the phone and I needed to see her.. To continue from where we left… I just wanted to kiss her. I missed her eyes, I missed her voice, I missed her..

I knew it would be difficult with our schedules and Christine. But I wanted to see her again just for 5 minutes and I would be ok. I just wanted to tell her that I liked her..

And I did. And she did the same. And now we are together, like girlfriends. I'm Ashley's Davies girlfriend. And I am afraid..

I am afraid because of Christine. I am afraid because of Ashley being famous. I am afraid because I am in love with her and she will eventually leave me. I am just afraid.. And I can't say anything to her because she is so caring, patient, and loving. I know she likes me. She told me she is in love with me. So why am I afraid? I don't know.. We never came to my place.. Not that I don't like her being here but it's not simple. If I bring Ashley home and she meet Christine then when she will leave me it will be difficult. For both of us. I know that if Christine meets her she will love her as I do. And if something happens she will be confused and devastated. Like me..

But Ashley is so ok with everything. I told her not to meet in public places and she accepted it. I tell her to meet to her house and she accepted it. That is why I'm driving myself crazy. Because I feel that Ashley means whatever she says but my mind says other. We are not even three weeks together and I think that I'm putting my relationship in jeopardize..

"Mommy?"

"Yes, baby?"

"You ok?"

"Of course baby. Just tired from work. How was your day?"

"Ok. Here"

Christine was back from the day care. She handed me a paint she did. It was a house and a figure with a robe. I suppose that was me. She had so bright colors in her paint. I read somewhere one day that when a child paints with so many colors it means that they have a happy life at their home. And seeing her paint it surely made me happy. I love her so very much. After I divorced with Bob we made an arrangement for me to have her. I do believe that he never wanted her deep inside. And I think he knew deep down that I didn't want him. So I had what I wanted and he could have his life not worrying about his daughter. Asshole much?

"It is very beautiful baby. This is me?"

"Aha.."

"You made mommy wear her robe?"

"Yes."

"What mommy's job is? Remember?"

"Ehm.. dovlor?"

She was so adorable. She could lisp some words and I didn't correct her. I loved her when she was doing that..

"Well, mommy is dovlor. Nice baby"

My phone rang and by the ringtone I knew it was Ashley. I made a huge grin and picked it up..

"Hey baby"

"Hey rock star"

"That's how you speak to your favorite favorite person on this world?"

"You mean.. well I don't know who you mean?"

"Ha ha.. You are hilarious. So how was work?"

"Nah, the same as usual. Thank God I didn't have late shifts this week and I can be with Christine. How about you? Does the label pusses you still?"

"Yes.. they keep pushing me and pushing me until I say to them 'Go fuck yourselves mother.."

"Ashley.. Language.."

"What are you Spence? My mother? It's not that I am speaking in front of Christine or anything"

"I don't like it when you swear so much"

"Yeah, whatever. Can I see you tomorrow?"

"I don't know Ash."

"Come on.. I haven't seen you three days now. I missed you baby"

What am I doing? Why I talk to her like that? Why I am the bitch now? If I keep pushing her out she will leave me and that will be my fault.. Why I am so stupid??

"You know that I love teasing you Ash.. I missed you too. Well.. your house?"

"I thought about coming to yours sometime"

"Ash.."

"What are you afraid Spence?"

"I'm not afraid of anything." Big big lie

"I think that you do. Why you don't want me to come to your house ever? Obviously you afraid of something. You think I'm not good enough?"

"Ash.. it's not the right time to talk to you about something like that. I have Christine to look after and I have to feed her and bath her. I can come tomorrow at 21.00 to your house. Ok?"

"This is not over Spence.. I will see you tomorrow. Bye"

Before I reply she already had close her phone. Why am I like that? What am I doing? I am destroying something very good. Why am I hurting the person I love?

**

I couldn't sleep last night. I couldn't faction at work either. All I was thinking was Ashley and what she told yesterday. She didn't call me after and she didn't send me a message as she always did when I was at work. I think she is mad at me and she is right. If she did the same to me I would be pissed as well. I have to tell her what I think or else I will lose her and I don't want to lose her because I just found her.

_Hey Ash.. I'll be there in a few. Ok? Miss you.. Spence xx_

She didn't answer me back. I didn't know what to do. I thought of not going to her place but this would be more difficult than already was. So I decided to go and tell her why I was acting like this. I couldn't lose her.

She opened the door and she was wearing shorts with a wife beater. She seemed like she was crying all night. I think that she did and it was my fault. I tried to kiss her but she stepped back. I wanted to kiss her and she was clearly mad..

She let the door open and moved inside so that I could follow her.

"Ash?" she didn't answer me and I didn't know what to do..

"Ash baby. Please talk to me"

"What do you want me to say Spence? What? I think that already you made it clear to me"

"Baby please.. look at me. I missed you. I missed you so very much. I missed looking inside your eyes."

"Probably you are kidding. If you missed me Spence then you would something about that, but you didn't. So no, you didn't miss me. At all"

"Ash.. let me explain to you"

"There is nothing to explain Spence." She was distant and I didn't like it at all. I wanted my Ashley back and I would do everything to bring her back to me..

"Ash.. please. Look at me. Do you want to know why I am like this? Because I am afraid Ashley. I am afraid that I am falling so hard for you and someday you will get bored with me and you will leave me for someone else" I saw her looking at me surprised and I knew I had her full attention now. "I can't bring you home because if I bring you there with me I want you to stay with my forever. When you meet Christine I want it to be forever. It's something that I know you can't commit and then I can't.. That's why I am afraid. I am afraid that I am in love with you and you will just leave.."

"Did you finish?"

"Yes"

"Now it's my turn. I don't know what you didn't understand when I told you that I like you and I'm falling for you. I fell for you Spencer Carling and everything that means you. I haven't pushed you to meet Christine although I would like that some day. I respected you. Did I make something for you to feel like this? Because if I did something then tell me and I'll try not to do that again."

"You are gorgeous. You didn't do anything. You are an angel. It's my fault"

"Spence, I know who I was before you and I know who I am being here with you. You make me to get better day by day. And it's you who are doing this to me. If you think that of me then.. I don't know.. maybe we should…"

"NO. I don't think anything of you. I love you as you are"

"Love me?"

"Ooops?" now I scared her. If she run I don't know if I can catch her..

"You said you love me?"

"Well.. yeah.. it doesn't matter.. you don't have to say that back.."

"I love you too you know.."

"You do?"

"Yes. I do love you Dr. Carlin"

"Do you want to come to my place Ms Davies?"

"Are you sure? You don't have to.."

"I want to. And I want you to meet Christine. Ok? So.. would you like to come?"

"I would love to.."

* * *

**TBC**

**I hope I don't have any problems with the next chapters. Just so you know I had these new chapters ready from Monday..**

**R&R**

**xx**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hi guys.. Sorry I couldn't upload yesterday but as I told you before don't be afraid.. The longest you have to wait for an update probably will be two to three days.. Enjoy the new chapter..**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 7**

I am in a relationship.. Me, Ashley Davies, is in love and I feel so good. Is it bad if I say that I loved Spencer from the beginning? Because I did. What not to love? She is an amazing person and I'm head over heels for her. I know she feels the same. I know that she does but I feel that something is pulling her back. There are times that she closes herself from me. I haven't said anything because I know how difficult her job is and with work and Christine and now a relationship she maybe feels tensed.

When we got together I knew that it would be difficult for us to be 'official'. I knew it. But nevertheless I wanted to because I needed to. I knew that being with Spencer in public would attract paparazzis and I didn't want for Spencer to have any problem. So I agreed to meet her at my house or at our favorite places. As for the sex part.. Yeah.. No.. We haven't done anything yet.. Yes, we did make out a lot when she was at my place but beside that we didn't go further. It's not that I didn't want to. Spencer haven't been with another woman since high school and now that I think about it I never asked her if she was still a virgin.. With a woman I mean, because clearly she wasn't a virgin..

When I have to work and she has to work it's not easy to see each other. And I'm trying not to pressure her.. But I miss her when I don't see her.. We always meet late because of Christine. She doesn't want leaving her alone. So when she puts Christine to sleep she asks for Glen to come home and look after her so we can have some alone time.. When I am not that busy with the record I come by from her hospital but of course I don't come in in case someone see us.. To be true I am starting to feel uneasy with all this. It's not that I don't like her. It's because I do like her and I want for everyone to know. I don't want to keep us a secret and I want to meet Christine. But I feel she has a problem with something..

This past few days I am the one that always calling her. Maybe she is busy. Maybe she is tired. Maybe.. Maybe.. I don't want to think that she got bored with me so fast.. I hope that doesn't mean anything because I can't lose her now. I can't..

So.. I made the call again..

Spencer sounded different. She had the same tone when she spoke to me but I knew deep inside that something was wrong. But I kept going like everything was ok. But then it hit me. When I asked her when I could see her again because we couldn't meet she just said _'I don't know Ash..' _and I knew that something was wrong. But I put it aside and continued our talk. And then out of nowhere I asked her to meet at her place. Stupid me. My stupid stupid tongue spoke before I could think. And she hesitated. Then I knew. She had a problem with me. She didn't want for me to come to her place. Maybe she wasn't so tired or so busy. Maybe her problem was that she couldn't see us together in future. I thought she was bailing.. And then I snapped.. I raised my voice and she raised hers. Closing our dialogue she told me she would meet me tomorrow at 21.00. At my house.. What new..

I was so curious about why she was acting like this. I thought she wanted to break up with me. In thought of this my heart was hurting. I came to love Spencer so fast and feel things that I never thought I could feel. And now this?

I didn't want to call her or text her as I always did. I think she got the point because when she came the same night she looked puzzled.. Like she didn't know what to do. To hug me? Not to hug me? To kiss me? Not to kiss me? I just let her in and I took my position on my couch. I didn't want to look at her but I could sense that she was sad with this situation.. And I wasn't happy knowing that Spencer was sad.. And the most important that I was the one that making feeling like this..

She came near me and tried to ease the tension. She called my name but I still couldn't look at her. But staying away from her wouldn't be that easy. If we had to straight things up I had to face her and ask her all the things I wanted to and I was skeptical not to.

And as I let the words split out she did the same. Finally I knew Spencer's problem and it was fear. Fear that I would leave her. Like it was possible to leave her. And I thought she would leave me. Silly Spencer.. And the most important she loved me. She loved me and I loved her. After all we were both stupid. Afraid of something stupid. Yes, stupid us.

And then she asked me the most wanted thing..

_"Do you want to come to my place Ms Davies?"_

Yes, it was the thing that I wanted the most, besides Spencer of course, but I didn't want for her to feel obligated or something. I just..

"_Are you sure? You don't have to.."_

She hushed me with two of her fingers reassuring me that she wanted that and she wanted for me to meet Christine. Well of course it was already late and we wouldn't wake her up. We could arrange a picnic or something to one of our special places. I was already so happy..

We left my home hand by hand after saying those three words to each other and I was so incredibly happy. I was going to meet Christine.. And Spencer wanted me in her life..

After like 40 minutes we were back to her place. Christine was sleeping and Glen was still there just in case. When we got in Spencer introduced us and we handshake. Spencer and Glen were brother and sister. They looked the same. Blond hair, blue eyes. He seemed like a good guy. And for what I could see he clearly was. I was happy that Spencer had someone to relay on.

"Nice to meet you Ashley, finally"

"Yeah.. I could say the same."

"So.. Spencer.. Christine is ok. She didn't wake up or anything. I leave you two be. Goodbye Ashley. Nice meeting you. Hope we could catch on some time"

"I would love to."

With that Glen left us and now Spencer and I lay on her couch. She was resting on my lap while I was stroking her hair. She smelled like vanilla. Spencer's scent was amazing..

"Baby?"

"Hmm?"

"I am so happy that you want for me to meet Christine. It means everything to me and I want you to know that. I'll be there to help you with everything if you want me to"

"Ash.. I know that you would. And I love you for that. I didn't want for Christine to meet you not because I thought badly for you but because I was afraid that she would love you and if she did…" I hushed her kissing her. I knew she was mumbling and I knew she did that when she was feeling anxious about something

"Stop. You don't have to say anything else. But I want you to know that I will never leave you. Ok?"

"Promise?"

"I promise. I promise I will never leave you Spencer Carlin. Unless it's you who leaves me first" although I didn't mean to say such a thing I saw that Spencer didn't like what I said. She looked at me in my eyes and with serious voice she told me..

"Ash.. I love you. Ok? I'm in love with you. And before I met you I don't think that I was in love with someone. Even with Paulie"

"Paulie?"

"Ehm.. Paulie? My high school girlfriend? I never said her name. Didn't I?"

"Ehm.. No. I would know if you said her name.. But serious.. You didn't love her?"

"I thought I did. She was my first and I thought I was in love with her. But I wasn't. Or I thought I was."

"Sooo… she was your first…?" I don't know if I want to know if she had sex with her girlfriend. I wanted to be the first who would touch Spencer that way..

"Ehm.. you mean..?"

"Yeah.. I mean.."

"Well.. Paulie was my first.." I think I died. Yes, I am a dead woman. You may take the body.. "kiss. We never did anything more than this. We did make out but we never did .. you know"

"Fewwww" I think I just said it that loud..

"You are so cute."

"What?"

"You were worried? You thought she took my virginity?"

"Well.. I knew that you were with her and maybe she was your first.."

"Although we were together somehow I knew she wasn't the one who would touch me that intimate. But obviously neither Bob was. I wish I had my first time back"

"It's ok baby. You don't have to worry about that. I'm here.."

"I know Ash.. and I'm sorry we hadn't yet.. you know.."

"You don't have to worry Spence. Whenever you are ready.."

"But I want to.."

"Me too. Me too babe."

She started kissing me on my neck while sucking a little. Well maybe hard. I knew tomorrow I would have a big hickey over there but I didn't mind. She took her time on my neck when she moved to my earlobe taking it to her mouth and teasing me. Her hand was travelling down to my pants and she was rubbing my centre. I was so turned on.. So so turned on.

"Do you like it baby?"

"Mmmm.. Yeah.."

I liked it a lot actually. Feeling Spencer's touch was beyond. She unbuttoned my shirt and she started massaging my breasts. I could feel my arousal now. Yes, I was wet for Spencer… but then I realised where we were and what we were going to do. I didn't want Spencer's and mine first time to be on this couch. And I didn't want to have sex while Christine was in the next room sleeping. I think that we caught up to ourselves without knowing.. Although I didn't want for Spencer to stop doing what she was doing to me right now I had to..

"Mmmm.. Spence? Baby?"

"Mmmm… Yes?"

"Baby.. please.. stop"

"Why?"

"Spence believe me when I am saying that I don't want you to stop right now what you are doing to me because it is incredibly hot and you are sexy as hell and your touch and your kiss and you.." yes I was mumbling again.

"Ash…"

"Yes, I'm sorry. Well baby.. Christine is in the next room and I don't feel ok with her being there and us being here. What if she gets up? And I want our first time to be somewhere romantic where I could be with you the way I want to. Please forgive me.."

"You are right. I'm sorry I carried away.."

".No. You were fine and I wish you could carry away every day actually.."

"So.. do you wanna sit here with me holding me?"

"I would like that. But I can't stay long enough because you have to go to work my beautiful girlfriend and I have an early fucking meeting" I realised I said fucking again.. oooops?? "I'm soooorrryy…?

"It's ok. Don't worry. Come give your woman a kiss"

"Oh… I would love to"

* * *

**TBC**

**That was it for the day. Tomorrow hopefully another update. I like writing this story. And after finishing it I already thought of another story with my favourite couple. Hope you liked it.. And I promise they will have their along time and it will be AWESOME..**

**R&R**

**xx**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

If someone came to me and asking me what is it that I want from my life I would say to fall in love. I have it all. Money, a big house, I'm famous. I had it all but I wasn't in love. And now that I am in love I would trade everything just to stay with Spencer for ever. All I have don't worth anything at all if I can't share it with Spencer. She is just it for me. And I hope I mean the same to her. She told me she was afraid that I would leave her but I am the one who afraid. I'm afraid every day that Spencer will realize that I am not the best person for her daughter, I just… I am not what she's looking for. My past will always hunt me and I hope for the day that doesn't come to surface.

"What are you thinking baby?" yes, I was thinking again while I was with Spencer. These days I do it a lot. Because I can't seem to forget who I was..

"Hmm.. nothing.."

"Are you sure? Because you were in deep thinking"

"I'm sure Spence. How is Christine?"

"Glen wanted to take her for an ice cream."

"He is very good for her"

"Yes, he is. Christine's father wasn't that much of a father model. Well, when we divorced she was and still is very little. And Bob didn't want her.. so.. Glen is the closer to a father and I am so very happy to have him near us." She said while caressing my arm.

"I'm sorry about Bob Spence but I am happy that you have Glen. He is a very good guy."

"What about you baby? You were so tired when I came to peak you up from the studio and you didn't say anything up until now. How's the new album going?"

"They keep pushing me. The other albums had success and they want for this album to have the same. But I am tired Spence. I'm so tired.."

"Don't you like your music? I thought you liked it"

"I did.. I do.. But I want to be able to things of my own. I don't want to be depend on others opinion.."

"Baby.."

"I don't know Spence.. I really don't know.. What time is it?"

"It's 20.00."

"Glen probably is coming home with Christine. Maybe it would be nice if she would find you at home."

"I told Glen to call me when they will be back. So I can stay a little bit longer with you."

"Spence.. I'm not feeling ok right now. Maybe it's better for you to go home and I will call you tomorrow"

"Ash.. what is it?"

"Spence just go please"

"Baby.." she tried to touch me but I get up before she could. I know that I am being a bitch right now but with all the thoughts I having and the fucking record pushing me.. I just want to be alone.

"Go Spence. I will call you" I rushed her to the door and I closed before she could say anything else. My temper is always before me. I know I am wrong for treating her like this and THE Ashley fucking Davies came to surface and hurt the one person she loves. Well done me. Well done..

All these years I was alone. Yes, I did have Kyla and Aiden but I was Alone. I had my music and nothing else. I fucked a different girl every night, I was drinking and so many other things that I am not proud of. So I built this wall in front of me so nobody could come inside and hurt me. I was the one who always hurt the others. Selfish maybe? Yes, I know. And I know that I don't want to be this selfish bitch everyone calls me. I want to be a better person because of her.

_While your love still suffocated, I'm constantly devastated, just to stay alive.._

That was my ringtone. I didn't want to peak it up because right now I didn't want to talk to anyone. So I let it keep ringing without seeing who it was..

_While your love still suffocated, I'm constantly devastated, just to stay alive.._

Someone is very persistent. Without looking the ID I peak it up.. well kind of rough

"WHAT"

"Hell to you too.."

"What do you want Kyla?"

"Hey.. Can't I call to my sister who was absent for the last year? Well.. thank you Ashley"

"Kyla, I'm not in the right mood right now. What do you want?"

"I just wanted to say hi Ashley. Jeezz.. What is up with you?"

"Nothing is up with me".

"Troubles in paradise?"

"Excuse me? What did you just say?"

"I was joking. Oh my God. Are you PMSing something?"

"Kyla, I'm turning the phone off."

"Ashley, it is me. You know you can talk to me. I'm serious." Well I could talk to her and tell her how I was feeling and what I did wrong.. She is my sister after all..

"I'm a fucking idiot Kyla.."

"Yes, I know that"

"Hey.. You are suppose to listen to me"

"I'm sorry.. Keep going"

"You know how I love Spencer.. Don't you?"

"Aha.."

"Well three days ago we had a big talk where she told me she was skeptical of me meeting her daughter because she thought I would leave her but now I am the one who is afraid that she will leave me and then I have the record pushing me and then I pushed Spencer out of my house and now I thinking that she will never talk to me again" I said all of it in a breath. I think that I lost Kyla.. "Kyla are you still there"

"WOW"

"Is that a good thing?"

"Of course it's not because you are a fucking idiot Ashley. You are my dear. You have something good here and you put it on hold. I don't know why you had to snap at Spencer. She didn't do anything."

"I know I know. That's why I am stupid and I feeling like shit right now"

"You should be. Did you call her?"

"Hm.. no. I said I would though"

"So why are we still talking?"

"Thanks Ky.."

"That's what sisters are for."

"I will call her now"

"Ash.. I want to meet her someday. In the near future you know. Because she must be something for you to feel like this and be like this"

"She is Ky.. She is."

"Ok.. go call your girlfriend"

"Bye.."

"Bye"

I was feeling much better after talking with Kyla. And the good thing is that being with Spencer for a month I learned how to understand my mistakes. And it was a mistake for pushing her out when we discussed everything.. I just needed to call her.. I hope she would peak it up and maybe forgive me..

After the fourth tone she peak it up

"Spence before you say anything I want you to know that I love you and I am terrible sorry for what I did later. I am such an idiot Spence. I am such an idiot. And you probably think that I am worthless and you probably thank God for me not meeting Christine yet.."

"Are you finished?" she was.. I don't know.. She was different for what I was used to..

"Spence.."

"No Ashley.. No Spence me..Why?"

"Spence I am sorry. I am. Can you please listen to me?"

"I don't know if you have anything to tell me"

"Please Spence.. please.. Hear me out"

"Ok.. Go on.. I'm very curious"

"Spence.. you knew what I was.. I built this shit for a while now and sometimes it comes back to me out of nowhere. But the truth is that I was thinking something when you asked me"

"I asked you and you said it was nothing. Why you lied to me Ashley?" she called me Ashley.. She haven't call me that for a long time.. I am in deep shit..

"Spence.. I was afraid.. ok? I was afraid. You told me you were afraid that I would leave you but now I am the one who afraid. I am afraid that I am not good for you, that I am nothing and there will be a day that you will realize that and you will leave me. And they keep pushing from the record and I snapped. I am sssssssoooooooooo sorry Spence…"

She didn't say anything. I knew it.. I screwed up. That was it. I lost her. I lost my love because of the fucking me..

"Spence.. are you still there?"

"I'm here Ash.." she called me Ash.. that is a good thing. Isn't it?

"Spence.."

"I didn't know you felt like this. Why you didn't say anything Ash?"

"Well.. I was a little bit selfish maybe?"

"Ash.. we are in this relationship together."

"I know Spence.. God I know.. I haven't had a true relationship before.. I try my best baby for us. I promise you. Now am I forgiven?"

"I don't know.." I heard her giggle. I knew she was smiling now..

"Come one Spence.. pretty please?? I promise you I will be good for then on"

"Well what can I do? When you are so charming I can't say that I won't forgive you"

"Really baby? You forgive me? You love me?"

"Oh Ash… I do love you so very much. I wish you knew how much"

"Well maybe if I could come over there and you gave me a kiss?"

"Hm.. that's something.. I wouldn't say no.."

"What time do you want me there?"

"I just put Christine to bed. So you could come whenever"

"I'll be there in a few"

"I'll be waiting"

"I love you Spence"

"I love you too."

I am the luckiest girl on earth. I have the most loving and caring girlfriend in the whole world. I am so glad she forgave me. And I am going to see her. I can't wait to see her.

I was at her house earlier than usual. Well I was driving like really fast. I couldn't wait to hold her. Before I could knock the door she opened it for me and gretted me with a kiss and a hug that I needed so much

"Hello to you too"

"You are early. Did you drive fast?"

"Well.. kinda"

"Ash.. please watch when you drive do fast. I want you one piece."

"I promise. But I was driving fast so I could be with you. I am sorry Spence.." she hushed me with another kiss and I knew that I was forgiven.. Thank God..

"Don't lie to me Ash for anything. I want for us to be true. If you feel something or if I did something I want you to tell me and I will do the same. Ok?"

"Ok.. I promise"

"Ash.. when you did what you did I was out of mind. I didn't know why you did that and I couldn't think of a way. It was scaring not be able to touch you. So don't do this again. Because I don't know if I can handle this."

"Dr. Carlin you stacked with me. All of me."

"And I want all of you Ash."

We kissed and kissed till our lips were swollen but we didn't care. From my part I had Spencer kissing me and I liked that. I am so glad I could be with her.

"Ash.."

"mmm??"

"I want you to meet Christine." Oh my God. I could meet her at last. It's not that I didn't see her while I was here. Well she was sleeping but she was an angel. She looked like Spencer a lot. I hoped for the day I could say 'hello' to her..

"Really? Like really really?"

"Yes, baby. I think it's time. I want you to meet her. My two favorite girls."

"Am I your favorite girl?"

"You are my special favorite girl baby. I am so in love with you"

"Oh, baby.. I am so happy that I can meet her. I promise you I'll be the best example to her. I'll be there for you. For both of you"

"You better because I want you to be close to us."

"Oh, Spence"

We cuddle on her couch for a while and kissed when it was time for me to leave. I didn't want to leave her. I came to want to be with her every minute and every hour. When I was away I missed her.

I kissed her goodbye and left with a big smile. I was going to meet Christine and I was so happy.. Slowly I was becoming a part of her family and she was becoming a part of mine..

* * *

**TBC**

**Ashley's ringtone is 'Suffocated' by Orianthi. This girl can really play guitar. She is amazing.. So.. this was the new chapter. Hope you liked it..**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**xx**


	9. Chapter 9

**Well this is what we all were waiting for. Spashley alone time. This chapter is for you somthgIlike2do.. Enjoy the new chapter..**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 9**

Tomorrow it's Spencer's and I two month anniversary and I want it to be special. I haven't done anything like that for no one in the past. Well in the past I never had a real relationship either. But this time I want to be perfect for us. I even asked Kyla to help me out. Not that I don't know how to plan a special night for me and my girlfriend but I am feeling nervous. Will she even like what I planned for her? I guess we will see tomorrow eh?

"Ky?"

"Yes, Ashley"

"Will she like it?"

"For the hundred fucking time she will love it. Jesus Ashley"

"Why you are being mean sis?"

"Ashley.. Are you for real? You keep asking me that every minute."

"I'm sorry ok? I'm feeling nervous."

"You shouldn't be because for what you are saying to me Spencer adores the ground you step"

"She is not my pet Kyla"

"I didn't say that. I just said that she will love it and that she loves you. So don't worry please. You are making my head hurt. Please"

"You are bitch"

"Takes one to know one"

"Ha ha ha"

"What time will you go and take her from home?"

"I haven't told her yet"

"WHAT?"

"Don't scream in my ear. I haven't told her yet because she had a surgery and then she had a parents meeting at Christine's school and well I didn't say anything"

"Oh, my God Ashley. Really. You are driving me crazy. Call her now. Please"

"Ok ok ok. But she is at work.."

"NOW"

"I'm calling her. Thanks Ky"

"Whatever"

"Byeeee"

"Yeah, yeah.. Call me later ok?"

"Ok"

I should have tell Spencer about my plans for tomorrow but I didn't want to bother her. But I think I should call her now to tell her not to arrange something because I have a surprise for her…

"Hey you.. I missed you today"

"Hey baby.. I missed you too. How was the meeting?"

"They just wanted to inform us about the Christmas party. They will be some children saying some poems and they will have a play as well.. Christine will have the main role. Isn't it amazing?"

"Really? Well wow!! Nice Spence. I'm sure she will be perfect."

"How was your day honey?"

"It was boring as hell. I had to go to the studio to record a new song"

"Oh, my God Ashley. You never told me about the new song." I knew she was pouting right now. I knew she wanted to hear the new song but it was a surprise. I wrote it just for her and I wanted to be perfect when she could hear it. One more thing to surprise her..

"Well.. I never told you because then it wouldn't be a surprise"

"Assh.. what do you mean?"

"Well, do you know what is it tomorrow?"

"Hm.. tough.. I don't know. Do you know?"

"If you don't know then I can't tell you"

"Come on Ash.."

"Nope."

"And what if I tell you that I just remembered?"

"Well, I would give you a try"

"Ok. Tomorrow it's when you became mine"

"Aha.. go on.."

"Tomorrow is when I could kiss you official as my girlfriend. As my hot, sexy, famous rock star girlfriend."

"Ok.. you are forgiven"

"You are so easy Ash"

"That's what I've been told"

"I won't comment in that"

"Maybe you don't. So.. tomorrow.. Don't do anything. I made plans"

"Plans? What plans?"

"Just so you know, I won't tell you anything but the hour to be ready when I'll come to peak you up."

"Come on baby.. You know I hate surprises"

"You love surprises. And no. Tomorrow I'll come and peak you up at 7.30 pm sharp. Ok?"

"I can't see you tonight?"

"Tempting.. but no. You will see me tomorrow"

"But I want to see you.."

"Goodnight Spence"

"Ash.."

"Bye Spence.."

"You are mean.."

"I love you baby.."

"I love you too. I'll be dreaming of you"

"You better."

"Bye Ash.."

"Bye love"

Well, now I can't wait for the next day to come. I have so many things to do. I hope she likes what I prepared for us.. Of course she will like it. I hope she like it..

**

It was 5.30pm when I went to take a bath and start preparing my self for my date. What I've planned.. Well.. I secluded a big area on the beach. I wanted us to be alone, and I wanted to have our anniversary where I took her the first time after we met. It means everything to me here. I even hired John, the hot dog guy for us for the day. I didn't want for us to go to a big restaurant were everyone could see us and we couldn't be alone. And there is this publicity thing that Spencer till doesn't like and I respect it. Whenever she will be ready for us to be public I will be here waiting for her..

Well, I was wearing my mini jean skirt with my favourite white t-shirt of DKNY, my favourite chain on my neck and black hills. Simple and rocky. I had my hair straighten and now I was ready to take my girl from her house. I told her not to wear something fancy. She didn't know were we were going but soon she would find out.

7.30 and I was already outside waiting for her. As it was still early I told her that I would send her a text message to come outside. I didn't want to meet Christine while taking her mother to a date. Glen was there to help her as always. I started loving this guy..

_Hey baby. I'm outside waiting..__ Ash xx_

In less than a minute I saw her coming to my car. I couldn't let my eyes look anything else than her. She was beautiful.

"Hi baby"

"Hi girlfriend. You are.."

"Same to you baby. You are sexy as always"

"You are perfect. Where is my anniversary kiss?"

"Ohh… I forgot to kiss my stunning girlfriend. How bad I am?"

"Very very bad. And I am hurting here" I took her hand and put it on my heart. Well I put it to my breast and I had her to touch it just a little bit. Now who is bad?

"Come here silly." I laid my head and we had a very long kiss. Love and passion in one kiss. How I love Spencer's kisses.

"If we don't leave now I think that I'll jump you and have my way with you in my car, in your neighbour."

"Yes, I think it's time for us to go"

I drove us to the beach. All the way there she held my hand and never let it go only for me to change gears. When we were there she knew what I've planned. Almost, because the night it wasn't over. Yet..

"Ash.. the beach?"

"Of course. Were did you think I would take you?"

"Some fancy restaurant?"

"Nope."

"I love it here"

"Come on. We have the beach to ourselves." I took my way on the back of my car and I took two blankets so we could sit. It wasn't cold this time of the year but I had two jackets with me also just in case.

"You thought of everything eh?"

"Of course. It's the day I celebrate my love for you and I want it to be perfect"

"I love you so much Ash"

"Same here Dr. Carlin"

Spencer was sitting in front of me and I was holding her in my arms. We were watching the amazing sunset of California and I didn't want to be anywhere else but in Spencer's hands.

"_I'm sorry Ms Davies?"_

"Ah, yes John"

"_Two hot dogs as you like them"_

"You are an angel John. Thank you so much"

"_Whatever you need Ms Davies"_

"I will John, thank you"

"Ash.. what was this?"

"A special treatment?"

"Baby, what have you done?"

"Nothing. I would do everything for you Spence. If I could give you the moon then I would"

"I don't need anything Ash. I just need you"

"And you have me. Now this is for you" I said while I took something from my back pocket. "Here"

She opened it and I knew she liked it just by her face. She was smiling and that was what I wanted.

"I love it Ash.. I love it baby. Thank you so much. But you shouldn't. It's too expensive"

It was a petal key pendant with round brilliant diamonds in platinum. It was expensive but nothing was expensive for my love.

"It's nothing. You worth more than that. Sure you like it?"

"Ash, are you kidding? It is perfect. Could you please put it on me?"

"I would be glad to"

"Spence?"

"Yes, baby?"

"I don't want to sound cheesy or anything but as long you have this key on your neck you have my heart also. You are the one who owns the key to my heart" she was crying. I didn't want her to cry. "Baby why are you crying?"

"I'm sorry, but I never had someone to love me that way. I never had someone to love as much as I love you"

I was so glad that we loved each other that much.

"Now it's my turn to give you your present"

"Spence, you didn't have to. I don't need anything"

"Sush.."

She gave me the box and it was an elegant script, handwritten, narrow bangle in sterling silver bracelet. In the outside handwritten said 'I love you'. It was amazing. It was expensive and I didn't want her to buy so expensive things.

"Baby, it's perfect. I love it. But you shouldn't have done that. I would be glad with just a rose you know"

"I know and I love you for that. But I wanted to."

"Well, it's perfect. As you"

We stayed at the beach for an hour or so. I planned to take her to her favourite place as well. At the park. But before we went there we took two ice creams for the way. Very childish, I know. But she makes me that way. I want to be just me with her. Simple. Not try to be something else.

For me it was the best anniversary ever. And I hoped it continued because I wanted her to come to my place. I didn't have my mind there. You know.. Having my way with her.. I just wanted to have her for the day. All mine..

"Did you like it baby?"

"Ash, I loved it. It was the best anniversary ever"

"I'm glad that I was the first"

"I'm glad also baby. Soooo… where are we going now?

"I thought maybe .. if you want.. we could go to my place and hang out. Just the two of us"

"Of course. I would love to baby."

"Awesome"

I hoped she would come. I had candles light up before I left. Well, I gave my keys to Kyla to light them up when I would call her.

When we arrived I took her by her hand, turning her to watch me. I let my hands fall on her waist and gave her a big kiss.

"Why was that for?"

"Because you make me happy. Now come on."

When we got in I turned to look at her face. When she saw the candles and the roses on the floor she turned her face on me and smiled.

"You had it all prepared I see. You knew I would say yes?"

"I was hoping you would say yes"

"Oh Ash.."

"What would you like to drink?"

Before I say another word her hands were on me. She kissed my neck while sucking a little, trailing her tongue on my collar bone letting small kisses here and there. I would never get bored of Spencer's kisses. Her hands had a mind of their own. I felt them exploring my body. She touched my breasts under my shirt, massaging them. I was starting to turn on. If she kept going like she was I didn't know if I could stop.

"Spence? Hm.. wh-at are you.. doing?" I said between moans

"Kissing you"

"Hmm.."

She didn't have to say anything else and neither did I. She took of my shirt and I was left just with my bra and skirt on. She continued letting her kisses slowly on my body. I just wanted to feel her. To touch her. And she was already full dressed. No. No. In less than a minute she would be in the same position. I let my hands travel her body while I was now the one who did the kissing. I took her earlobe in my mouth while biting a little. I knew she liked it when I did this to her. I laid down my hands to touch her beautiful legs and while I was raising her dress I came to realise that she wasn't wearing an underwear. OH MY GOD. Kill me now please. How I didn't realise it while we together?

"Spence?" I was speechless. I wanted her so much..

"Don't stop. I want you Ash.. please don't stop"

I took off her dress and now I had a naked Spencer in front of me. I felt my heart skip and I thought I could have a heart attack. I never saw her naked before. She was amazing. I took just a moment to look at her..

"Spence.."

"Please baby.. I want to feel your hands on me.. I need you"

Answering to her pleading tone I did what she asked me for. I laid her on my couch (which was like a bed. I like big couches) and I kiss her breasts. They were soft. So soft. Like they were never been touched. I sucked and licked her right breast while I was massaging her left. I heard her moan to everything I did to her. I wanted to touch her. I wanted to touch her in that place where I knew that no other woman been before. I knew I was the first and hope the last. I just looked her one more time before I go down on her. She nodded and that was my confirmation..

I kissed between her thighs before I kiss her clit. She was so wet. I sucked and licked while I was inserting her with one finger. She was so fucking wet and only by feeling her I was ready to cum as well.

"Oh, my God.. Ash.. more.. more baby.. I need you inside me"

I put another finger inside her and now I was thrusting her with two of my fingers. I kept playing with her clit with my tongue. I could feel she was ready to cum as I could feel her inside walls spasm to every move I took inside her.

"Cum for me baby.. I want you to cum all over my hand"

"Baby.. I'm .. going.. Oh.. my God.. Ash.. I'm going to cum.. ASSSSHHHH"

And she did come all over my hand. I put out my hands but I continued licking her folds. She was tasting like yummy..

"God.. Spence.. you taste amazing" I said while I licked the fingers I had like a minute ago inside of her..

"Ash.. that was.. amazing.. Oh my.. You are so sexy doing this"

"You are hot.. So we make the right couple.."

"Come here" she kissed me and I knew she could taste herself on my mouth. "Now it's your turn.."

OH my…

* * *

**TBC**

**Hope you liked it.. I did…**

**Reviews are always always welcome..**

**xx**


	10. Chapter 10

**Well.. what do you say? Are you ok with me uploading almost every day?? I like it though.. I love being a part of this story and I'm glad you are with me ..After all it's our story and not mine only.. I thought that we had to read Spencer's POV as well..**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 10**

**Spencer's POV**

She is amazing. Ashley is everything you would want in a relationship. I never imagined that she would be like this. Loving, caring. There is no day that goes by without thinking of her and without loving her more and more. She came to my life unexpected and I am so happy for that. Tomorrow is our anniversary and I'm sure she planned something. I can't wait to see what she planned for us. I would be ok if we could stay home and hold each other. She knows that I don't mind of that and I hope she will like what I got for her. Probably she will yell at me because once she told me that she doesn't want anything. That she will be the one that spoils me and not the other way around. I'm so lucky to have her as my girlfriend..

I haven't spoken yet with Ashley because of work and because of a parents meeting. I miss her already. We talk every day and when we don't I keep thinking of her.. And it's our anniversary and I don't know what we are going to do..

As she heard my inner voice she did call and hearing her was something that I needed to. She did planned something, I knew it.. She didn't say anything she just told me to be ready when she would come to peak me up. If I know her, which I do, I know that we will go somewhere special and being official but not official it would be somewhere not crowed. I hoped for the beach, where she took me after we met. It's there where I saw her. Where I started to love her. So this place is special for us.. I guess we'll see tomorrow.

Ashley and I weren't intimate yet. Well, we did make out a lot but I wasn't ready to be with her like that. Not that I didn't want it, I did. But I wasn't experienced as she was. Ashley had, I don't know how many girls in the past and if we did what we did I wanted to be perfect. And then we couldn't because of work and Christine and we haven't yet. I hope for tomorrow though. It will be perfect. She told me to wear something simple. I guess my sundress it's perfect with something not underneath. I'm bad, I know. But I want her more and I want it for us. I can't wait to have her all mine for a day.

**

I can't wait to see her. She will be here in less than ten minutes. She told me yesterday that she would texted me because she didn't want to come inside and meet like that Christine. Did I tell you how much I love this woman??

"Spence? Are you ready? Ashley will be here and you won't be ready" that would be Glen. He is happy for me and Ashley and he is so receptive. I told him that we had our anniversary and without telling him anything he offered to look Christine for me.

"I'm ready Glen. I'm just taking a last look at the mirror. I want to be perfect for her"

"Spence.. she loves you as you are. You are beautiful."

"Thanks Glen. For everything"

"You are my favorite sister"

"I'm your only sister silly"

"Yeah, yeah. Please have fun. Ok? And don't worry about tonight. Tomorrow I don't have to go to school so you may stay with Ashley as much as you want. You both need it."

"Aw.. Glen.. Thank you so much. You don't mind staying and look after Christine? I don't mind.."

"Spence, I love that girl as my own. So no. I don't have a problem. You need to be with your girlfriend for some alone time" he said and winked at me..

"Glen.. I hope you don't mean what I think you mean.."

"I don't know what you think I mean.."

"Whatever.. I'm ready. How am I?"

"Perfect"

"I'm going down to kiss my daughter.."

Christine is my angel. I love her so very much. I love my girls so much and I will never regret for none. I will never regret being pregnant with Christine knowing that Bob wasn't what I wanted and I will never regret being with Ashley because she makes me happy and feel loved..

"Hey sweetie? What are you doing?"

"Mommy.. pait" that would mean that she was painting.

"What you have paint, let's see.." it was a forest and a clear blue sky with a shining sun.. "It's perfect baby. I love it. When you finish it we will put in on the fridge"

"Yes, mommy. Pwetty mommy" she said while hugging me and letting her head fall on my neck. She was stroking my hair and was holding me even tighter and I did the same. I'm not used to letting her from my side.

"Mommy has to go. Ok baby? Be good for uncle Glen. I love you baby girl"

"Yes, mommy. Kiss?" I gave her a big kiss and she did the same. When I set her down my phone bibbed and I knew Ashley was here..

_Hey baby. I'm outside waiting.. __Ash xx_

"Glen, Ashley is here. I am leaving ok?"

"Yes, Spencer. Go. Your woman is waiting for you"

"Bye baby girl"

"Bye mommy"

She was there waiting for me at her car. Her car. A black porche Boxer S. I love that car. How I came to know about cars? Well my girl is a fan of them. Actually a fan of these expensive cars..

She was amazing, beautiful, sexy, hot, hot , hot.. _Spencer take your mind out of the gutter.._

We kissed and she drove me to I don't know where. And I didn't mind at all.. If I would be with her..

Deep inside I knew she would take us to the beach. This became our favorite place. And there were no one else there. I think that she had to do with it. She took two blankets and we went to sit down watching the sunset. Out of nowhere a guy with two hot dogs came and gave them to us. It was the same guy..

"_I'm sorry Ms Davies?"_

"_Ah, yes John.."_

"_Two hot dogs as you like them"_

"_You are an angel John.. Thank you so much"_

"_Whatever you need Ms Davies"_

"_I will John, thank you"_

I guess she hired John for the day. That would be Ashley..

She gave me her present and I gave hers. Mine it was far more expensive from what I bought for her and although I liked it I didn't want her to give me so expensive gifts. And she didn't want it also. So I guess we could have a problem with that because she wanted to give me the moon and I wanted to give her the sun.. The perfect couple..

When it was time for us to go she asked me if I wanted to come to her place.. Like I would say no to Ashley and be with her alone..

We got in and I was surprised one more time. She had candles lighten up and pedals on the floor.

"You had it all prepared I see. You knew I would say yes?"

"I was hoping you would say yes"

"Oh Ash.."

"What would you like to drink?" _you._ Yes, that was my thought. I couldn't wait to touch her. To feel her. I wanted her. And I knew she wanted me as well because her beautiful chocolate brown eyes were even darker than before. I took her in my arms and kissed her neck where I know it's her favourite spot. I kissed and licked and I was already turned on just by kissing her. I don't know what if my hands would go down there what would do to me. Before I think anything else she took me in her arms and started to kiss me. I love her kisses so much. They have passion, lust, love. Everything, in on of her kisses. I felt her hands raising my dress a little and I knew that in less than a second I would have a surprised Ashley looking at me..

"Spence?" I knew it. When she felt that I didn't wear anything underneath I thought that she would die on me.

"Don't stop. I want you Ash.. please don't stop""

And thank God she didn't. She took off my dress and I was standing now naked before her for the first time. I felt that it wasn't the first time that she was looking at me like that and I wanted her to touch me. She started kissing and sucking my one breast while she was massaging my other. She continued kissing and when she was just before to go down on me she looked at me for confirmation.. I just nodded. I want her..

She kissed between my thighs avoiding the place I wanted her most.

"Please baby.. I want to feel your hands on me.. I need you"

And before I understand what was happening she started kissing my clit, sucking it and licking it. Oh , my God.. I haven't felt like this before.. No one had me feel like this before.. Nobody was ever down on me like that. Not even Bob. I never let him to touch me like this. But I wanted Ashley to be my first. She didn't know she was my first there…

She put one finger inside me while she continued attacking my swollen clit. But I needed more of her.. I needed more of her inside me..

"Oh, my God.. Ash.. more.. more baby.. I need you inside me"

She put another finger and now she was thrusting me with two of her fingers. I was so ready to cum.. I was.. ready.. to cum..

"Cum for me baby.. I want you to cum all over my hand"

"Baby.. I'm .. going.. Oh.. my God.. Ash.. I'm going to cum.. ASSSSHHHH"

OH my God.. I can see at last.. It was the best orgasm I ever had.. She put her fingers out but she continued licking my centre, I think that if she continued doing this I would come.. again..

"God.. Spence.. you taste amazing" she said looking at me while she was licking the two fingers she had not but just a minute inside me.. She was so damn sexy..

"Ash.. that was.. amazing.. You are so sexy doing this"

"You are hot.. So we make the right couple.."

"Come here" I took her in my arms. Now I wanted for her to feel what she made me feel.. "Now.. it's your turn"

She was still with her bra and her skirt on. I wanted her naked.. I unbuttoned her skirt and I took it off her tossing it aside. She was wearing black boy sorts and her back bra. I was on top of her kissing her while I let my hands explore her body. She had an amazing body to touch. I lift her body so I could take her bra off. I took slowly her straps down while kissing her at her collarbone. With a light move I took off her bra and now I had her naked torso in full view. I took just a minute to memorize it. I laid her back back on the coach caressing her body and kissing her luscious lips. I took her harden nipple in my mouth biting and sucking it and I knew she liked it because she moaned into my moves.

She was still in her underwear but not for long. I started to go down on her, kissing and licking her abs. She was starting to tremble and I knew she wanted me. Incredibly slowly I took of her underwear and I had her naked beneath me. I was still on top so I took her one leg and I had our clits joined each others. I started moving with her and feeling her clit touching mine it was like heaven..

"Oh.. my.. Spence.. baby.. ah.. i.."

"You feel amazing Ash.."

"Baby.. please.. I want you to.. fuck me.. please.."

She wanted me inside of her. And I wanted to be inside of her. I unlocked our bodies just to give her what she wanted so much. I was lying on top of her kissing her while I had one of my fingers inside of her. Knowing Ashley she would want more so I put another finger and started thrusting her. She was so tight and that turned me on even more

"Yes, baby.. fuck me.. I want you deeper inside of me.."

I put another finger inside her and now I was trying to follow her. She was riding my fingers and feeling her inside walls I knew she was ready to come..

"Baby.. I know you are ready to come. I want to come with you Ash.. I want us to come together.."

Before I finish she had her two fingers inside me..

"God Spence, you are soo wet"

"That's what you are doing to me baby"

We were fucking each other and in less than a minute we came to each others hands. I let my body fell to Ashley's naked torso. I had the two most fucking amazing orgasms in my whole life..

"Baby?"

"Mmmm.." I was so out of place that I couldn't speak.

"Are you ok with this?"

"Ash.. I'm more than ok with this. I wanted to for so long baby"

"Are you sure?" I'm glad that she thinks of me. After all I was the one that never been with a woman and I was the one that wanted to wait..

"Baby.. you were amazing.. I had the two most amazing orgasms, and it's you who did that to me.."

"Spence, I never felt like this before.."

"Me neither baby. No one did that to me ever. You touched me where no one ever had the chance.."

"Spence? What?"

"Ash.. you know I never been with a woman before so you were my first in that. But you were my first and in something else.."

"Spence..?"

"Ash, baby, you touched me to the place where I never let Bob touch. I didn't want him down.. there" I said while I gave her the look..

"Really? Never?"

"Never."

"So.. I'm your first ha?"

"And the last. After what you did to me I don't think that I want anyone else to touch me like that.."

"And I don't want anyone else to touch you like that. You are mine"

"I'm yours Ash. My body, my soul, my everything. It's yours"

"I'm yours too you know. Do you have to leave?"

"Actually no. I can stay. Glen is home and he told me he could watch Christine. So.. I can have you all the night"

"Oh, Spence.."

"Now, kiss me. I missed your kisses"

Two things coming in my mind right now. First I had sex for the first time with my girlfriend and second I had her all mine for the rest of the night. And one last thought.. _I love her.._

_

* * *

  
_

**TBC**

**What do you think?? You liked Spence's POV? Now and then I will have Spencer's POV but basically it is Ashley's..**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**xx**


	11. Chapter 11

**Hey guys, sorry I couldn't upload yesterday but here I am today!! Here is the new update!!**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 11**

Everything that I craved for all these months came true. I had my first time with Spencer. We made love on my couch. At my home. Celebrating our anniversary. I never thought that we will be that intimate. I hoped to but I never thought that this special day could mean more that just our love. Spencer came prepared. For God shakes. She didn't wear underwear. Naughty Spencer.. Who new?

This night she was all mine. We were both here. Mentally and physically. She didn't have to leave me. I didn't have to leave her. We had the night for ourselves and to have sex more than one times.. Yeah, if you had Spencer in your bed you would do the same..

"Baby?'

"Mmmm?'

"Are you ok?"

"I'm more than ok Ash.."

"You don't think that …"

"I don't think anything. Actually you burned my cells.."

"That good?"

"Ash.. I can't think. I can't move. I can't even talk"

"I guess this is my answer." I made my move to kiss her naked torso and while I was kissing and sucking her beautiful nipples, although she moaned I heard her say my name..

"Ash… please.. i.. can't.. I had four orgasms. I can't take another one.."

"I love you Spence. I love you so much. I hope you know it"

"I love you too. So.. please.. can you please hold me? I want you to hold me"

"I think I can do that.."

I knew I wear her out. But she felt amazing. I wanted every part of her and now that I knew how it was to make love to this beautiful woman, I think that I wouldn't take my hands off her..

Although she could stay with me for the night she had to go to work as I did.. We slept only three hours. Yes, I made love with her all night and I didn't mind it at all.. For a strange reason she didn't feel tired and neither did I. When I opened my eyes Spencer wasn't near me. She couldn't leave me like this..

"Spence?" _nothing_. "Baby? Are you here?" I put my robe with nothing underneath, because obviously I made love all night so I was naked.

"Right here. Did you miss me?" I saw her with a towel cover her naked body..

"I thought you left.."

"I took a shower.."

"Why you didn't wake me up? I could shower with you"

"Ash.. if I waked you up to have shower with me we wouldn't go to our jobs.."

"Doesn't matter.. If it was to have you with me for an hour I wouldn't mind.."

"But I do, Ash.. I work in a hospital and they need me there.." aouts.. I keep forgetting this. Spencer is a doctor and well, I am a rock star

"Yeah, sorry.."

"Don't be like this. You know that I want nothing more than you. I wish I could stay with you.."

"I understand Spence. I have to go to the studio though. Do you need a ride to the hospital?"

"I have to be there in 30 minutes. Do you think you can make it?"

"I'll be quick" I stood up to go to the bathroom but before I did Spencer stopped me.

"I haven't had my Ashley kiss."

"I'm sorry. Let me kiss you then.." to be true to myself I felt strange. This little monster inside me begun to feel jealous. And I, Ashley Davies, doesn't do jealousy at all. I wanted Spencer to tell me that she could stay with me. I am not paranoid. I haven't thought of her being with me the whole day but she could stay with me for another hour. So the kiss I gave her was nothing but a quick peck on her lips and I walked my way to the bathroom.

After 10 minutes of showering I didn't take my time to find my outfit of the day. I just wore jeans with my favorite t-shirt and because I haven't the time to dry my hair I just had them in a pony tail.

"I'm ready. Whenever you are.." Spencer had her clothes from yesterday so obviously she couldn't go to work with her sundress and no underwear. So I lend her some clothes I thought she could like and we left..

All the way to the hospital which it wasn't that far away I couldn't say anything. From the corner of my eye I could see Spencer looking at me like she wanted me to say something. I knew that treating her like this was stupidity but as I said the little monster I had inside was coming at the surface. I tried not to let it.. I tried..

"What time do you finish today?" I had to make a conversation. After all I had sex with this woman, I said I loved her and I gave her a promise..

"Uh.. Late this afternoon. Around 20.00. You?"

"I don't know. Probably I have to be at the studio till late."

"Will you record new songs?"

"Yes."

"Ashley?"

"Yes?"

"Do you want to say anything to me?"

"Like what Spence?" _yes, I'm trying to play it cool.._

"I don't know. You tell me. You haven't even look at me since we left home"

"I don't know what you are talking Spence"

"Ashley, I think that I know you so far. Don't you think?" and I snapped. I shouldn't.. But I snapped.. Remember what I told you about Ashley Fucking Davies?? Yes.. That's me..

"WHAT? You know me?"

"Yes, I think I do know you Ashley."

"You don't know a shit Spencer. Shit. You don't know me because no one knows me. No one."

"As-hley?" she never saw me like that. In the whole two months we were together she never saw me like that and I don't know why I yelled at her..

"No. Spencer. No. We are here. Go to your work."

"Ash.." she tried to touch me but I moved back.

"Go Spencer.." she didn't say anything else. She just opened the door and hit it hard while she left me behind thinking what an asshole I am. Well done, again, Ashley Fucking Davies. Well done.. "FUCK"

On my way to the studio I kept thinking what happened this morning. Why I felt like this with her, why I snapped at her, why I love her so much and I keep carrying on like this? Why?

I knew from the beginning who Spencer was. A very good doctor and a mother of a little girl. Christine. Now I know why she kept her from me. She told me that if I met her and then left them both they would be devastated. Now I knew. Spencer do know me. And it's the only person who knows me so well. And I am afraid.

To say that my day was hell would be correct. I couldn't sign and my behavior was nothing but pleasable. But when I was pleasable to others?

"Ashley what is going on?"

"Nothing."

"Ashley you know that this is a fucking lie."

"Ian. Don't shrink me"

"I try not to but when you aren't telling me wha…"

"Just stop right there. I don't have to tell you a thing. NOT A FUCKING THING. Understand?"

"Ashley, sometimes I really don't understand you"

"Ian. You are my manager. Not my friend. So do your job. Please." I knew I was hard at him. I knew I was hard at Spencer. Why I keep treating people like this?

"Ok, Ms Davies.." It's the first time he called me _Ms Davies. _And it felt strange.. "You have to record two songs for the day. We have a dead end"

I knew I couldn't sing. Today wasn't my day. But I knew that if I didn't do this I would have a problem with the record. And right now if anyone pushed me more I think that hell would break into earth.

**

I was at the studio for I don't know how many hours. I think it was dark outside. I didn't look my watch but I would say it was like 21.00.

"Are we ok? Can I leave now?"

"I think that we are alright Ms Davies. We had both songs recorded. Very nice work."

"Bye"

I didn't stay longer to hear anything else. I kept thinking of Spencer. She probably is mad at me. And why not? After my burst I think that she might want to break up with me. I took my phone in my hands scrolling down to find 'S'. I tried to call her but I couldn't. It's not that I didn't want to. But what if she didn't peak it up or worst, what if she told me that she wanted to break up with me. I screw anything up. I really have to stop doing this..

I parked my car outside and I was looking for my keys to my apartment. While I was still looking I saw Spencer sitting outside my door. I took a good look at her and she wasn't ok. She was sitting down, with her hands on her knees. When she saw me she stood up..

"Spencer? What are you doing here?"

"I was waiting for you"

"Are you serious? It's like.." _I took a look on my watch and it was 22.30 _"22.30. Shouldn't you be home right now?"

"Can we please talk?" I knew it. She wanted to break up with me face to face. Now I wish I made this phone call. At least she wouldn't see me cry..

"Of course. Come in"

When I saw her eyes I knew she probably had cried through the day. They were misty and red.

"Do you want something to drink?"

"Some water please"

She sat down on the same couch we made love yesterday and I did the same..

"Ashley, I want to talk to you"

"I know Spence. I am ready to hear whatever you want to tell me"

"What happened this morning?" now. What I say? The truth or some lie?

"Spencer.."

"No. Ashley I want you to tell me. Because if something like this happen again I want to know what to do.."

"Spencer, I am just stupid ok? I'm a fucking asshole. I am a bitch and a bad person for treating you like this. You don't need someone like me in your life"

"First of all let me judge this ok? And you are not an asshole. Sure you are stupid. Why Ash? I want to know why"

"I'm used to treat people like that. I tossed them like they were nothing. I never fall in love with no one and being with you make me want things. Things that are difficult for you to give me."

"What did you ask me to give you Ash and I didn't?"

"You are perfect Spence. It's me that I am the screwed one. I am needy with whatever has to do with you. I want you more and more and I know that you are a mother and I know that you have a responsible job and that is why I know that you can't give me what I want. And what I want is you."

"Ash.. you have me. I gave you myself yesterday. I gave you my soul. You have my heart lying in your hands. Why are you like this? Please make me understand because I don't."

"Spence.. I know that. And I know that I am being stupid but it's something inside me.. Do you know why I snapped this morning? Because although I could take a break from the studio to be with you, you couldn't take an hour to be with me. I think that I don't mean to you…"

"Ashley are you serious? Because if you really are I don't know what we are doing together." _What am I doing?_

"Spence, I didn't mean it that way.."

"How did you mean it then?"

"I just want you."

"I want you too but I am not treating you that way Ash. When we got together you knew who I was and what I did and you wanted us to be together. Fuck, I wanted us together because what I feel for you is something new to me. Do you think that I don't feel the way you feel? Do you know that I try to suppress my feelings for you leaving me to go to another tour while you will be surrounded with girls and boys crying your name? Do you? But here I am. I try to be supportive for you. I try to be here with you. Holding your hand. Why don't you do the same for me?"

"I.. I.. didn't know Spence. Did you think that I would cheat on you? Because I would never.."

"Ash.. please.. I don't want us to fight anymore. It breaks my heart."

"Me too. But, I love you Spence."

"Fuck, Ashley. I love you too but don't break my heart.."

"I won't baby.. Please forgive me.."

"Ash.. I want you to know that I know where you're coming from and what you've been through but I want us to be true to each other ok? I want you to know that I'm here for you, and I would love to take a break from my work to be with you but I can't. I wish I could, but I can't."

"I know Spence. I was just needy. But now that I know you wanted to.."

"Never question again my feelings for you. Never"

"I will never.."

"Now kiss me. Because I missed you and because you made me cry"

"Aw.. baby.."

I kissed her eyes and then her lips. I didn't want her to cry over me ever again. I knew I was selfish and stupid and although Spencer made me a better person I had a long way before me. I only hope for nothing like this happens again..

* * *

**TBC**

**I know that you wait for Ashley to meet Christine. In the next chapter I'll have them meet. Hope you liked it. If you did or didn't review. I wanna know what you think of me..**

**R&R**

**xx**


	12. Chapter 12

**Are we already on chapter 12??? WOW!!! Thank you guys for all the support. It means a lot!!! Enjoy the new chapter..**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 12**

I remember my days before Spencer. When I was someone that mothers wouldn't like for their sons and in my situation, their daughters. What I am today it's my mother's fault. My mother wasn't the type of mother who loves her child unconditionally. She was a model when she was young and then she met my father. The one and only, Raife Davies.

I loved my father very much, although I never saw him more than 150 days in my whole life. But he was there for me. He didn't push me out of his life when I told him that I was gay. My mother from the other hand was a total bitch. If she was a bitch to me before I told her, after I did she was someone else. She looked at me and I could see her disgusted face. So imagine what that did to a 16 years old teenager heart. So.. basically I had no father and a bitch as a mother. I taught myself to not care, I taught myself that I don't have to love someone and everyone was a fun for me. A little game. I didn't want to feel close to people.

And I managed very well. Until a blond girl two months ago made my heart skip. Made me feel what love is. And what I am afraid more is if I hurt her. I am afraid that, Ashley from the near past will do mistakes. And I did. And I am so glad that Spencer hasn't left me yet. I don't know what I would do..

I know that meeting Christine is a big step for both of us. And I won't make mistakes in that. Do you know what the ironic part is? That Spencer's daughter has the same name with my mother's. The name I hate the most. Ironic? Yes, it is. I never told Spencer before. And it's not that I don't want to. She knows things about my life but not everything. And I never told her about the name I hate so much.

"Hey baby?"

"Hey you? How's work?"

"Today was uneventful, thank God."

"That's a good thing? Isn't it?"

"Yes, yes. At least I can go home to my daughter. I missed her.."

"I'm sure she misses you too Spence."

"And I miss you.."

"Awww… really? You saw me yesterday"

"So.. I miss my beautiful girlfriend. Is that soooo bad?"

"Nope. Not at all. I miss you too.. Do you want to come to my place tonight?"

"What about you come to my place and meet Christine?" _Christine.. I wanted to meet her for so long. _"Really? Like really? Like I can talk to her?"

"You are adorable. You know that? Yes, really. Sooo?"

"I would love to come to your place Spence"

"We'll have dinner earlier than usual. So would you like to come and meet us at around 6pm?"

"That would be perfect. I'll be there. Thank you Spence"

"Don't. I wanted to for so long. But I don't know how we tell her about us. I'm sure she will not understand what 'us' mean to her."

"We will find something. Don't worry"

"If you are with me I don't worry for anything"

"So.. meet you in 5 hours"

"Can't wait to kiss you"

"Me too, babe. Bye"

"Bye Ash.."

Ok.. The day has come and to say that I was prepared it wouldn't be true. I wasn't prepared but I wanted for it to happen. Now.. what should I buy for a two year old girl? I have some shopping to do..

Should I have someone to buy something for Christine? But that wouldn't be alright. But how I go there without anyone take a notice of who I am. Up until now my relationship with Spencer was undercover. I never saw pictures of me in the tabloids and Spencer was safe. But what if someone sees me buy something.. I'll try my best not to be seen..

I looked and looked and I didn't find anything for the little one. Spencer talked about Christine all the time but she didn't tell me what she likes.. Fuck. Should I buy her a doll or something? I played with cars when I was at her age. But she doesn't look like a tomboy. She is like a princess.. What if I took her a laptop? _No.._ an Mp3 player?_ No.. _Why is it so difficult? Maybe I should buy her all the above?

"Excuse me? Do you need any help?" ok. Don't panic. I'm wearing my big Gucci glasses and my favorite jockey hat. And I look down.. Ok..

"Ehm.. actually.. yes" the saleswoman seems she doesn't know who I am

"Ok. What are you looking for?"

"A present for a little girl. She is two actually"

"Do you know what she likes?"

"No."

"Ok. We can take a look in the doll section and then maybe the toys"

"Ok."

I could see her take glances at me all the time. Maybe she found out who I am after all. But she didn't say anything.. For now at least..

"So.. this is all you have. I hope she likes it"

"Yes, thank you."

I didn't stay longer with her. Someone would say 'ok. You are a bid star. You should have someone to do your jobs'. But although I am a bitch, that's not new, I didn't want anyone to do things for me. I wanted to be able to do things of my own. And I wanted to buy these things for Christine..

I think that I overdid it a bit. Well, let me tell you what I have in the back sit of my car. A tricycle, two dolls, a ball, two or three cars, painting material and an mp3. Yeah, the last one was not what a two year old must have.. But I couldn't resist myself.

I took one last look on my watch and it was 4.30pm. I still had an hour to go change and be ready to meet Christine. Spence's daughter..

**

I was right at time. Well I was there 20 minutes earlier. Nervous much? Yes. It's almost 6 and I am still here sitting in my car. I think I can't move. I want to but my feet don't listen. Maybe it's something broken in me.

"The dinner it's inside you know. We can't eat inside your car" _ha?_

"Ehm.."

"Come on silly. You are outside for like 20 minutes."

"How do you know?"

"Because I saw you when you arrived. And because I can feel it when you are close. So.. would you like to come inside with me?"

"Spence.. I can't move"

"Aw.. my baby.. You are so adorable.. What if I kiss you?"

"Here? Outside? Don't you afraid if someone sees you?"

"Nope." She wasn't afraid? She wanted to kiss me in front of her house? What if someone sees us? And while she was leaning to kiss me I stopped her with my fingers.

"I feel ok. You see? I can move now."

"You don't want me to kiss you?"

"Oh, believe me. I doooo.. But not here. You will give that kiss when we get inside.."

"Ash.. what is all that?"

"Presents?"

"You shouldn't have"

"I wanted to. It's my first time I meet her. I want her to like me Spence"

"She will love you as much as I do"

Ok, now that I could move again Spencer took me by my hand and some of the presents I had in my car. It was now or never. I was inside her house and I felt like it was the first time I was stepping in.. Spencer must have sensed that and she placed both her hands on my face and kissed me.. I needed that..

"Are you ok now?"

"Much better.."

"Christine is in the living room painting. Come meet my girl"

She was a perfect little angel. A Spencer mini me. Blond hair and blue eyes. Of course I haven't seen her eyes but Spencer told me before.. When she noticed us she took her time looking at me..

"Baby, this is Ashley" she didn't say anything. Why she didn't say anything?

"Aswy?"

I moved where she was sitting and I bend down to her height to talk to her. I gave her my hand..

"Hi, little angel"

"Hi"

She had the blue eyes of her mother. But it was a different blue. Spencer had some grey inside but Christine's was like the sea. The deepest blue you can see..

"You are beautiful"

"Thanks. You are too" she said touching my face.

I turned my face to look back at Spencer who looked at us with so love and I believe I saw a tear in her..

"Do you want to see what I took for you?"

"Pesents?"

"Yes, presents" she is so adorable. I think it is love at first sight. Like with her mother.. "Come with me princess"

I took her by her hand and I showed her what I took for her. She loved the tricycle the moment she saw it like she did with what I took her for her to paint. Of course she liked the other things as well but not as much as those two. At least I knew I bought her something she liked. And that she gave me a big hug and a kiss.

Christine was in the living room and Spencer and I were at the kitchen. She cooked roast chicken and salad. She knew I liked it.

"So.. how do you feel?"

"She is amazing Spence. She is beautiful and kind and adorable and everything.. I love her."

"I think she likes you too"

"I hope she.." I was stopped by a little blond calling my name and hugging my legs

"Aswy?"

"Yes, sweetie?"

"See." She wanted for me to see what she painted with what I got for her. For a two year old she painted very well. It was a figure outside a house holding a little girl. They had happy smiles on their faces.

"It's very very beautiful sweetie. I think mommy would love this"

"Aswy.. you" she told me. Did she mean that the figure it was me?

"Is that me baby girl?"

"Aha. Aswy and me"

"It is you and me?" I think that now it's not the right time to cry. She liked me. Christine liked me and I loved that little girl.. "It's perfect. Come here"

I took her in my arms and I kissed her like I would never see her again. Spencer was there looking at us without saying anything. She knew it was a big step to meet Christine not only for her but for me also. For once in my life I feel loved. And I feel loved from two beautiful blonds.

It was bed time for Christine. Although I would love to have the little angel with us a little bit longer but she had to go to bed. I thought of staying downstairs but Christine wanted to take her to bed with her mommy. And Spencer didn't mind at all. We both took a hand each and took her to her bed.

When I was ready to leave the room to let mother and daughter say their goodnights Christine called my name again.

"Aswy?"

"Yes, baby girl?"

"Sing me?"

"Do you want me to sing you goodnight?"

"Aha.. pease?"

"Whatever my girl wants"

I tried to remember a bedtime song I used to listen before I sleep when I was little.. And then I sang it for my little girl..

_Lullaby and good night, with roses bedight_

_With lilies o'er spread is baby's wee bed_

_Lay thee down now and rest, may thy slumber be blessed_

_Lay thee down now and rest, may thy slumber be blessed_

_Lullaby and good night, thy mother's delight_

_Bright angels beside my darling abide_

_They will guard thee at rest, thou shalt wake on my breast_

_They will guard thee at rest, thou shalt wake on my breast_

"Goodnight baby girl"

I waited till Spencer said her goodnight to Christine. I never left the room. I saw them together and I felt what it is like to be home. And Spencer was my home.

She let a small light open and the door half open. She took me by my hand and we got down to the living room. Why I was feeling nervous meeting Christine? I felt like I knew her. Like she was mine and Spencer's.

"I love you Ash.. So much"

"I think I can tell because I love you too Spence.. Thank you for this day. Thank you"

"You don't need to thank me. Christine loved you. She has a thing for you"

"Well, I have a thing for her too. She is beautiful Spence. You raised her very well. She is a great kid"

"When you sang Lullaby for her I think my heart stopped. She was so calm when you were singing"

"I liked it too. It was like it was natural to me."

"You are very good with her"

"How can't I? She is an angel. Now I have two blonds caring my heart with them."

"I promise to take care of your heart"

"Please.. Because if you lost it I will be lost too"

I stayed with her a little bit longer. If you asked me I never wanted to leave this place. It felt like home, it smelled like home. I didn't want to be at my place all alone. For now you can call me Ashley Davies. I think that I'm losing day by day the Ashley Fucking Davies. Spencer it's the cause and I love it..

* * *

**TBC**

**The song obviously is not mine. It's Brahms Lullaby. So I had them meet. I loved this chapter. It was so.. adorable!! I wanna know what you think…**

**Reviews are always welcome. You know that..**

**xx**


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

**

* * *

  
**

Christine. Sure it's a nice name.. I came to hate this name so much but look at me now.. I think of that little girl from the hour I left home. _Home._. If you ask me I feel like home when I am with Spencer. So leaving her every time I go there I feel sad. Like a little child that is left alone by her mother.

I want to know Christine better. I want to spoil her, although Spencer wouldn't like it, I want to give her what I couldn't have as a child. Well.. that would be wrong because I had the world but not love. And Christine has all the love of the world. But anyhow I want to give her whatever I can. Both to her and Spencer..

Before I think anything else I feel my phone buzz in my pocket. Without looking the ID I answer knowing who that was.. _Spencer.._

"Hey baby"

"Hello to you too. Are you home?"

"Yes. Actually I've been here for 10 minutes"

"I told you to call me when you would be back."

"Aww.. I'm sorry Spence. Did you get worried?"

"I'm always worried about you. What if some paparazzi chase you down? So when I tell you to call me back, please do"

"Yes maam."

"I am so happy that you finally met my other girl"

"Other girl? Who is your other girl?"

" Well.. you know.. I have two favorite girls that I love them very very much"

"Yeah?? I suppose the one is your lovely daughter. May I ask who is the other one?"

"If you may ask.. That would be you. My other favorite girl if that is"

"You are my favorite girl too. In the whole world"

"I love you so much Ash.. So so much"

"Me too baby. Me too. What time do you work tomorrow?"

"Well I have a morning shift so I suppose the same as today. Do you have anything in mind?"

"Well I would like to see my beautiful girlfriend alone if my beautiful girlfriend would like that too"

"You are a charmer. Do you know that?"

"That's not new babe"

"My place or your place?"

"Whatever. I don't mind coming to your place. I would like to see Christine again and then maybe we could be _alone_?

"If you are a good girl maybe"

"But I'm your naughty girl Spence"

"What can I say? I have a thing for you however you are"

"Haha. Call you tomorrow baby. Goodnight Spence"

"Goodnight baby"

_I love that woman. Oh yes. I love her.._

_**_

Time fly so fast. I was almost every day at Spencer's home. Now we wouldn't meet so often at my house. And I wanted to be at Spencer's because I felt safe. Warm. And Christine loved me as much as I loved her. She is the perfect child. An angel, literally. And she is so cute. Spencer even gave me a spear key. Yeah, I know. It would happen sooner or later. Now she has the key to my place and I have the key to her place. Isn't life amazing?

Spencer always cooks and I find myself to be here every night for dinner, well except when Spencer works at night but I come to her place a goodnight to Christine while staying with Glen to chat a little. I love my girls very much and I would do everything to protect them..

"Christine? Baby girl. It's time to eat" yeah.. I am like a mother to this little girl. And I love my role very much.

"Aswy?"

"Yes, baby?"

"Huggy?"

"Aw.. what am I going to do with you? Ha? Come here"

"Ash, you are spoiling her. And she found your button"

"What can I say? I have a thing for blonds. You both girls have found all of my buttons"

"I'm sure I'll show you when we are going to be alone later"

"Spencer.. I have a kid in my arms"

"You are cute. Come baby girl to mommy"

"No.. I wan Awsy"

"Ash.. what have you done to my daughter? You put a spell on her"

"You would know.. You are under my spell my girls. The Davies spell"

"Come both of you."

We sat on the table as every other time. Christine ate her food as a good girl as I did the same. We took her to bed although she wanted to stay with us but Spencer was clear. When its bed time, its bed time. I like her when she is like that. I'm sure I'll tell her _later.._

"Did I tell you how I love that you are with us?"

"Hm.. no. Care to tell me now?"

"I love it Ash. It's like we are real family"

"For me Spence what we have it is real. You are my home. You and Christine are my family"

"What about Kyla and Aiden?"

"They are another kind of family. You are my light in the tunnel. Whenever I am going back you are there to bring me to you"

"Ash.."

"It's true."

"I'm glad. Because I feel the same. And for you being here with us, seeing Christine in her every day activities makes you her other parent. Something Bob will never be."

I didn't say anything. What can you say after this? I just took her in my arms and kissed her. We cuddle on her coach holding each other.

Now that our relationship count five months I find myself staying here the nights. It's something I like and it's something that Spencer likes. So this night it's nothing different. Tonight it's another night I will make love to my girlfriend and wake beside her..

"You have to be quiet Spence"

"Mmm.. Ash.. when I am not quiet?"

"Spence.. I don't want to traumatize Christine seeing her two mothers doing each other" oops.. I did say that aloud.. "I'm sorry Spence.. I didn't want to.."

"Ash.. Stop.. I told you before. For me you are Christine's other mother. Ok? Now relax and make love to me because I need my girlfriend so very much.."

"Oh, Spence.."

We didn't say anything else.. I took off her shirt throwing it aside. I started to leave my kisses all over her naked torso. I was in her place I knew she loved the most. Between her neck and her collarbone. I had my head between her breasts kissing them from the inside. I let my face be away from them only to kiss her on her lips. I like teasing her because I know she is already wet and waiting for me to touch her where she needs me more. And I need to touch her..

Although I was on top of her with a move she had me beneath her. She tossed my shirt to the place I tossed hers not a minute ago. She kissed me where she knew I was weak and knew she had me before I say_ wow. _

Now we stood both naked seeing each other. Although we have a very healthy sexy life when Spencer is naked before me is like I see her for the first time.

She knew I wanted to be in charge and on top of her. But not for long because after I would finish with her she would have her way with me..

We changed positions again and I had her where I wanted. My breasts were touching hers as I was moving upside down to touch her, to kiss her.. My wet centre was touching her thighs and I knew she wouldn't hold herself anymore..

"Ash.. please.. you know I can't take it any more.. I want your hands inside me.."

And I did what she told me to.. I had my mouth down to her centre while thrusting her with two of my fingers. I played with her clit sucking and licking in the same time I was trying to keep the rhythm between our bodies.. I continued inserting her with another finger of mine..

"Fuck.. Ash.. harder.."

"How you want it baby?"

"Hard.. I want it harder.. Ash.."

For the first time I had four fingers inside of her.. I saw a tear falling from her eyes.. It was the first time we did this.. I hope I didn't hurt her but when she saw the worrying face I had she just kissed me telling me she was ok..

When I felt her inside walls clench my fingers I knew she was about to come all over my hand. As I loved it..

"Come baby for me.. I want you to come for me"

"Oh.. Fuck.. Asss-hley.. Oh.. baby.. I'm coming.. Fuuuccck"

When I see Spencer glowing after sex I don't need anything else. I feel complete just by seeing her..

"Spence.. I told you to be quiet. What if Christine heard us?"

"It's your fault"

"How is my fault?"

"You do all these things to me and expect me not to cry your name? No. I can't hold it baby"

"What am I going to do with you? Please tell me"

"For now nothing because now it's my turn to go down on you"

_Oh fuck. I'm going to scream her name.._

She did as she told me. She got down on me. I had Spencer's head between my legs sucking and licking..

"Fuck, baby.. You are so wet.."

"That is what you do to me"

"Mmmm.. you taste so good baby"

She did those circles I love.. She licked my inside lips, my clit, all my centre.. She really got down on me.. I could come only by her tongue. She didn't need to put her fingers inside me

"Not yet baby.. I want to feel you"

"Fuck Spence.. oh my God.."

She was kissing me being on top of me while she was thrusting me with two of her fingers at first and then a third. She knew I wanted it hard.

"Do you like it baby?"

"Spe-nce.. Oh God.."

"You like what I do to you baby?" she continued what she did. Three fingers were inside me, curling me , thrusting me.. She let my mouth to go down on me. She sucked my clit and oh my God she had her fingers still inside of me..

"Fuck.. Spence.. FUCK.. I'm going to come.. baby"

She put out her fingers and continued with her tongue. I came inside her mouth..

"Hm.. yammy.. It taste you baby"

"You are so fucking sexy"

"Only with you baby"

"And you will be with me forever"

"Forever"

As we laid there naked under the covers holding each other I heard our door being open.. I tried to cover ourselves but what I could cover..

"Mommy? Aswy?"

"Baby girl? Come here to mommy"

"What is it princess?"

"Bad deam"

We had her between us, holding her. Our little girl had a bad dream..

"You scared baby?"

"Yes, mommy"

"Spence.. what if we have her with us tonight?"

"I suppose we can. Thanks baby"

"Mommy? You and Aswy seep?"

"We did baby. Do you want to stay with Ashley and me?"

"Yes, mommy. Pease Aswy?"

"Come here princess." I took her in my arms and gave her a big kiss.

She slept between us and we were holding her while we were holding each other. My perfect family..

"Spence, what if she came to our room minutes before? She would see her mommy between _Aswy's_ legs"

"We are lucky"

"That was close"

"I believe you came. You never were close"

"Spence"

"You are cute"

"You are cuter"

"Now sleep naughty girl"

"I want my kiss goodnight" she kissed me

"Now, sleep"

"Yes.. mommy"

"Ash"

"Goodnight Spence"

"Goodnight baby"

* * *

**TBC**

**That was chapter 13 people and going.. If you liked what you read review.. I'm always happy to answer to your wonderful reviews..**

**R&R**

**xx**


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

**

* * *

  
**

Don't they say that after the storm there is calm? Well in my situation there was never a storm. In my situation there was love and stillness. The one you have before the earthquake. This is what happened..

_Spencer and I were in our bed with Christine between us sleeping like an angel. I had a strange feeling that night.. I couldn't figure it out.. I let it slip though.. It was just my imagination._

_I tried to close my eyes and sleep but I couldn't. I didn't want for Spencer to be awaken by my insomnia so I got up as slowly as I could, gave a kiss to Christine's forehead and went to the living room._

_It was 5__.00am and I was still awake. I had this strange feeling again. I was so lost in my inner thoughts that I didn't feel Spencer sitting beside me. Kissing me in my arm.._

"_Baby, what is it?"_

"_Hm.. nothing Spence"_

"_Ash.. it's 5__.00 and you are awake. That means that you are not ok. What is it honey?"_

"_I don't know. I just couldn't sleep. I didn't want to wake you up. Go back to sleep. It's ok. I'm ok"_

"_Ash.. tell me.. I'm not going to sleep if you don't tell me"_

"_I just have a strange feeling. That's all."_

"_Are you sure this is it?"_

"_Yes, like I could hide anything from you"_

"_Hm.. no you can't hide anything from me. Because I am that good"_

"_Yes, you are baby. Now go back to bed"_

"_When you are not there with me I can't sleep"_

"_Ok, t__hen. If it is for you to not to sleep I'll come with you."_

"_You are the bestest girlfriend in the world"_

"_And then you tell me I am the charmer"_

"_I have my ways with you"_

"_Come on sweet talker"_

_We get back to bed but I couldn't sleep. I had my eyes on Spencer and Christine. My girls who laid next to me. My girls.._

_After a sleepless night, for me, we got up. Spencer made breakfast as she always did; we prepared Christine for the daycare, we gave her one kiss each and then there were two. Spencer had a night sift so we had some alone morning time together before I had to go to the studio._

"_Are you feeling better baby?"_

"_Actually no. Not really. I still have this feeling that I can't.. I don't know where is coming from"_

"_I'm sure it's nothing. You will see. What time do you have to go to the studio?"_

"_Well.. I have to be there in an hour and considering that I need one hour to go there, I have to leave now baby. I'm sorry I can't stay"_

"_Nah.. it's ok. I would like to have you for the day but I know you have the studio. Know that I will miss you though."_

"_The same here. I'll call you when I have a break. Ok?"_

_I kissed her and she kissed me back as we always did when the one of us have to leave for their work. I missed Spencer already. The strange thing though was that the feeling I had before I leave her house now it was even bigger.._

_After one hour exactly I was outside the studio parking my car. I saw some reporters but I didn't give that much of account. I was used to it. So I made my way there with my big Gucci glasses covering my face._

"_Ms Davies, here.." photographers was there taking my pictures_

"_Ashley.. here.. what you have to say about the photos?" what photos?_

"_Ashley there are some photos of you with a girl" a girl? But I have one girl and that is Spencer_

_That is when I found my voice and opened my mouth.._

"_I don't know what you mean. I'm sorry but I have to get inside"_

_I let all the photographers and gossip journalists outside the studio. What the fuck is going on? I need some explanations.._

"_Ian? What the fuck is going on?"_

"_Ashley, you may want to sit down" yes, we were back to Ian and Ashley. I told him that I was sorry about my behavior and I can tell that I have a friend who is my manager also.._

"_Why do I need to sit down Ian? There are like fifty people down there asking me questions"_

"_Probably they are asking you questions about this.." he gave me a magazine which as a front paper had me and Spencer kissing.. 'Spotted: Ashley Davies, Rock Star kissing some blond girl. Read more on page.3'_

"_WHAT?"_

"_I'm sorry Ashley." Ian knew about Spencer and I. But it was like three people who knew about us. Aiden, Kyla and Ian._

"_OH MY GOD. Spencer.. I need to call Spencer. She can't find out like this. She works at the hospital today. What if they know who she is. Christine. Oh, my God.. Her family.. They don't know.." I was panicking.. I think I can't breathe. My heads spin.._

"_Ashley, look at me. Ashley.. I said.. Look at me" Ian gave me a paper bag so I could breathe. Yes, I thought I was dying. What if they know who the 'blond girl' is?_

"_Give.. me.. my.. phone.. Ian.." I said between breaths_

"_Ashley.."_

"_Please.. Ian.. my.. phone.."_

_Spencer must have been at her house. When she had a night sift she cleaned the house and cooked for when Christine would come back.._

"_She doesn't pick it up Ian.. She.. doesn't.. pick.. it up.."_

"_Maybe she can't hear it Ashley"_

"_What if.. she knows.. already.." my heartbeats are like 180 and I don't even exercise._

"_Try again. Maybe she will pick it up now.."_

_I tried again and I let it till I could hear her voice.._

"_Come on Spence.. Pick it up.." and then I heard her.._

"_Ash.. you missed me already?"_

"_Spence.." my voice betrayed me. She knew that I had something.._

"_Ash.. what is it? Are you ok? Did you hurt? Oh, my God. Are you ok?"_

"_Spence.. No.. I'm ok. But.. I have to tell you something.. You may sit down"_

"_Ash, you are scaring me. Did anything happen to Christine?"_

"_Oh, God. No. Of course not.. But, Spence.."_

"_Ashley, please tell me because I am starting to go crazy now"_

"_They know, Spence"_

"_They? Whose they? And what they know?"_

"_You and me. They know. They found about us" there were silence on the other line of the phone.. "Spence?"_

"_How?"_

"_I don't know Spence. When I got here they were everywhere and they were asking me questions. Ian showed me the magazine but I haven't read it yet. They had a picture of us kissing.." there was that awful silence again.._

"_Spence.. I'm sorry. We will find something."_

"_Ash.. I'm .. sorry.. I have to go.."_

"_Spence?"_

"_I'm sorry Ash.. I'm.. sorry"_

"_Spence, please.. Don't hang up on me. We'll find something. I'll sue the magazine."_

"_Please, Ash. I'll call you later. I have to think about it. Please.. I have so many things to think about right now.."_

"_We can think about them together Spence"_

"_We can't Ashley. We just can't. They have photos of us kissing. What if they know who I am? What if they know about Christine? My family? They don't even know that I'm dating a girl, who by the way is Ashley Davies, the famous Rock Star. No... We can't think about it together. I have to think about it myself."_

"_Spe-nce?"_

"_I'll call you"_

"_Spence, baby?"_

_I didn't hear her telling me anything else because she had already hanged up on me. _

"_Ian? She hanged up on me. I lost her"_

"_Ashley, you didn't lose her. She is just socked. Imagine you were in her shoes."_

"_I would talk with her Ian. We could think something together. What I'm going to do now?"_

"_You just have to wait"_

"_I'm not leaving the studio today. I'm not going out there."_

"_You will have eventually."_

"_Give me the fucking magazine"_

'_Ashley's Davies new girl. Who is the new blond thing Ashley is kissing? She will not stay more than 1 month. Ashley Davies is well known as a heartbreaker. Here you can see their tet a tet.'_

_I was trying to remember where we were when they took this photo. It was a moth ago.. Yeah, I remember. Spencer and I were at my home. I was going to stay with her for the night and I told her I wanted to pick up some things for the night. I told her to wait in the car but she wanted to come upstairs. When I took what I needed, we head back in my car holding hands and I kissed her while I was opening the door for her to get inside. That's when they took our picture. You can't see Spencer's face clearly but if you know Spencer you will know it is her. I hope her family doesn't read those magazines or her co-workers at the hospital. They don't know we are together and they don't know she is dating a woman.. Fuck.._

'_We are curious to see where this "relationship" going. Is she for a day or for life? With Ashley Davies you never know. I guess we will see. But you have to say.. Ashley has a great taste in women..'_

"_Those mother fuckers.. Those fucking stupid people. Grr.. I'm furious.. Oh.. I'm going to sue them. Yes.. Ian find me the number of their offices."_

"_Ashley, I say you wait. Don't do something irrational."_

"_Irrational? Ian? Are you kidding me? They have a picture of me and Spencer kissing. Kissing. And maybe I lost Spencer. The one good thing in my life."_

"_I know Ash.. But please.. Wait a day or two.. And if they found you again and ask you questions say 'no comment'."_

"_What am I going to do with Spencer, Ian?"_

"_I don't know. Clearly is something that concerns both of you. But Spencer has more to deal with. She is a mother, she is a doctor and she has a family who doesn't know about you and her. From the other hand, you have nothing to lose. You are already out"_

"_Just Spencer"_

And here I am now. Two days later and Spencer still haven't called. I tried to call her but I always found myself talking to her answering machine. I didn't know what to think anymore. I didn't know if we were already broken up. I just didn't know. The one good thing was that they didn't know her name. All they knew was that she was my 'next blond thing'.

I was sitting at my apartment alone in the dark. My phone never stopping beeping. For the last two days they wanted to ask me about the new girl. After the first two times I stopped answering and I only answered to my family. Kyla was there for me. And Aiden and so Ian. But all I needed was Spencer. I wanted Spencer to call me. To tell me that we are ok. That everything is going to be ok. But she never called. And I was still waiting…

Then I heard my door open and close. I didn't bother to think who it was. I was in my room deep in my thoughts. Maybe it was Kyla. She told me she would come by to see how I was..

And now she was in my room because I could feel her inside. And by my door that was now open..

"Kyla.. please.. I don't need you ok? You can go"

"It's not Kyla" no. It wasn't Kyla. It was Spencer.. I forgot she had the spear key I gave her months ago..

"Spencer?"

"Ash.. we need to talk.."

* * *

**TBC**

**I hate leaving you like this but what can I say?? I'm evil?? I'm a total angel if you may know.. Hope you liked this chapter.. It had a lot of drama.. Till the next chapter…**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**R&R**

**xx**


	15. Chapter 15

**Hey guys!! Goodmorning to my friends from this side of the continent and nice dreams to the ones from the other!! You will have something to read when you will up!!! This chapter will have both Ashley's and Spencer's POV so we can see what is happening to Spencer's mind also! Enjoy!!**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 15**

**Spencer's POV**

When do you know that something bad is going to happen? Six sense? Intuition? Something? When you are a mother you have this a lot. You know when something is wrong with your child. Even if you are away you feel that your child maybe hurting or feeling sad. That is call mother's intuition. But what when your girlfriend has a bad feeling? When you are connected with your other half then you feel it too. And I felt what Ashley felt. And it was strange..

Being with Ashley is something that it can not be described. It's when you know that you found your haven. You know you found your other half, your soulmate. And it is very rare. Before her I didn't know that I could find such a thing. I stopped believing in love other than my child's love. But when I found her, when she found me then I was complete in every sense.

I knew she couldn't sleep that night. I could sense it. But I didn't want to say something. Being with Ashley is to know Ashley. And I knew her very well. If she had something she wouldn't tell me, just for not worry me. She is strong and she doesn't want for me to think any less. But when she got up I knew that it was something that should be discussed.

I saw her in the living room, lights off, sitting on our couch in deep thinking. I knew she was thinking. But the theme was, what she was thinking? I know that the studio pressure her and maybe it was something that had to do with that.

She didn't know I was there. I sat next to her and still it was like I wasn't there. Up until I kiss her in her arm. Then I saw the emptiness in her eyes. Then I knew it was something bad..

It was 5am and she was up. And Ashley it's not a morning person. She loves her sleep too much. I needed to know what was that was keeping her up..

"_I just have a strange feeling. __That's all."_Strange feeling? But what if she had something else?

"_Are you sure this is it?"_

"_Yes, like I could hide anything from you" _The truth is that shecould never hide anything from me. Because I know her as she knows me..

The rest of the night was like before. Ashley still couldn't sleep and I knew that she was in our bed only for me. The rest of the morning was like all the others. We did our morning ritual and I had to let her leave because she had to got the studio.. The strange thing was that when she left me I felt a lamp on my stomach. The one you have when you know that something bad is going to happen. I hope she will be ok..

Having a night shift has its ups and its downs. When I have to work night at the hospital I have the time to be the mother of the house. I'm doing the shopping thing, clean, cook, whatever a mother would do. I was in the bathroom when I thought my phone was ringing but I thought that whoever that was would call again.. And it did, and it was my love..

"_Ash.. you missed me already?"_

"_Spence.."_and then I knew. I knew something was going on. I know that tone very well. I would recognize that tone from everywhere.

What if she was hurt and in a hospital, what if she crushed with her car? My mind was going crazy..

"_Ash.. what is it? Are you ok? Did you hurt? Oh, my God. __Are you ok?"_

_"__Spence.. No.. I'm ok. But.. I have to tell you something.. You may sit down"_

"_They know, Spence" _who were they and what they knew?

"_You and me. They know. __They found about us"_

And then I crushed. I was sitting, while a minute before I was standing up. I was holding the phone and I couldn't speak. They found about us. Paparazzi, Christine, my family. Oh my God..

"_How?"_

"_I don't know Spence. When I got here they were everywhere and they were asking me questions. Ian showed me the magazine but I haven't read it yet. __They had a picture of us kissing.."_

When I was kissing Ashley? We never were public. Always at her place or my place and the beach when no one was even there. They can't be.. They.. just.. can't… found about us..

I knew I was losing myself. I knew that Ashley was becoming nervous by my way to not pronounce words. But what I could tell her. What you can tell when your world is crushing?

"_Ash.. I'm .. sorry.. I have to go.."_

The one thing that I couldn't think right now was Ashley. All I could thing about was Christine and my family. I didn't care for Glen because he knew. But what if my father or mother knew about this? Oh, my God.. Christine.. the hospital.. Those nurses like to gossip so much. They don't know anything about my personal life. Now I'm sure they will know..

"_We can't Ashley. We just can't. They have photos of us kissing. What if they know who I am? What if they know about Christine? My family? They don't even know that I'm dating a girl, who by the way is Ashley Davies, the famous Rock Star. No... We can't think about it together. I have to think about it myself."_

"_I'll call you"_

Would I? I would call her? I could give a promise to my girlfriend and I could keep it? Right now I don't think so. Right now I want everything to go away. This didn't happen. No. It's just April's fool. But it's January.. Then it's January fool..

"SHI SHIT SHIT"

I need to go out. I need to buy this so to call magazine. I need to know..

It was a photo of me and Ashley kissing while we were going in her car. Outside her house. I remember that day.. She would stay at my house. And I remember she told me to wait for her but I never did. I just wanted to be with her.. And now I'm just crying..

_ring ring ring_

"Yes?"

"Hey, Spency. What's up?"

"Nothing Glen."

"Come on little sis.. Don't underrate my intelligence. I know that I'm slow but I know when you are not ok."

"You are right"

"I know. About what?"

"That you are slow and that I'm not ok"

"Is it Ashley? Did you have a fight?"

"No. Actually we are incredibly fine. But.. I don't know if we will be for now on."

"Wow.. wow.. Are your breaking up with her? Spencer.. You are both in love. When I see you I know you are forever. What did she do?"

"Her? Nothing. She is perfect"

"You are loosing me"

"They know Glen. The fucking gossip reporters know about us. About me and Ashley. They have us kissing"

"WOW"

"I don't know Glen. I just don't know. What if they know who I am? They only thing it says it's that I am her 'next blond thing'

"Ha ha.. Ooops sorry. So what Spence? They know"

"Glen.. it's not that easy. We didn't want to go public yet. We wanted to be for each other for a while and not for the media. And I don't want to put Christine in such a roller coaster"

"Well you put Christine in this roller coaster when you got in a relationship with a celebrity. You put your daughter in this roller coaster when you had this celebrity, who by the way was and still is your love of your life, meet your daughter and act as a mother to this girl. And this girl loves her as her mother as well. Spencer, she called her momma. You are a family. Don't you love Ashley?"

"So very much Glen that it hurts. It hurts because right now I know she is hurting because I can feel it. I can feel it Glen"

"Then that is your answer. You just have to figure out what you both will do. You are in this together Spence. Don't try to push her away because you are going to lose her."

"And what about mom and dad?"

"We tell them together. I'll be there for you. And for God shakes Spencer. You are 26 and you have a daughter and you live by yourself. Give yourself a credit. You are not 16 anymore"

"When you became the smart of this family?"

"I always were but you were the little one and I was your big bother"

"Thank you Glen. For everything"

"Think what we talked and call her. She needs you Spence. As much as you need her"

I knew that. I knew. But Glen was right. I loved Ashley and I needed her. For now I have to think what we are going to do. What am I going to do?

Ashley's POV

"Kyla.. please.. I don't need you ok? You can go"

"It's not Kyla"

"Spencer?"

"Ash.. we need to talk.."

Is she really here? Are we talking? Maybe it's my imagination because I was in total black for two days. Not eating, not drinking. I was just.. out..

She knew that I couldn't say anything. She knew that maybe I was in some kind of illusion. So she sat next to me. She laid next to me and held my hand..

"Spencer? Is that you or am I going crazy?"

"It's me Ash."

I couldn't hold it anymore. I let my tears fall on her. I just held her in my arms and cried. As I didn't the last two days

"Ash.. please don't cry."

"Spence?"

"Why you are sitting here with lights off?"

"I didn't want to."

"Let me turn them off"

"No.. please.. Spence" but she already turned on my bedside lamp. To say that I was a mess would be true. I was a total mess. My eyes were red; I was in the same outfit for two days. I didn't bother to take them off. And my lips were dry because I didn't want to drink water.

"Ash.."

"It's ok Spence. I'm ok"

"No you are not and I am the cause for this."

"It's ok. It was my fault"

"Where was your fault Ash?"

"I should consider your feelings about our relationship. I shouldn't be with you while I knew you had a daughter to protect. I shouldn't be in your way"

"Ash.. you were never in my way. I was.. I am in this because I wanted to"

"But you left me Spencer. You just left me hanging for two days. You never answered your phone Spencer. I thought you broke up with me. I still believe that."

"WHAT? No. Ash. I never.. I couldn't.."

"If you came here to tell me that you are breaking up with me tell me now please. I think I can take it"

"Ash.. no.. I didn't came here to break up with you"

"So.. what are you doing here?"

"I came here to tell you I'm sorry for my behavior. To tell you, that I'm with you in this. That I'm ok. And I came here to do this.." and she kissed me. She kissed me and I felt it. For two days I didn't feel anything. She kissed me and I felt everything.

"So.. you are not breaking up with me?"

"I could never break up with you. You are everything to me. I'm sorry you had to think that way."

"Why Spence? Why you left me for two days?"

"Ash.. I had to think."

"We could think together. If you didn't want to see me we could talk. You weren't speaking to me Spencer"

"I know. I know. I was stupid and then I wanted to talk to you but I didn't know if you would be there to peak it up. I didn't know you would want to be there to talk to me. And then I did what I thought it was best. I came here. You are my here Ash. And I promise you that we will find something. Know that we will be together."

"Promise?"

"Promise"

"So.. what are we going to do with all this?"

"We will just say that this is all true. That I love you and you love me"

* * *

**TBC**

**Of course I wouldn't break them up. I like drama but not break ups. But.. you never know.. Hope you liked it!!!**

**Reviews are always welcome. I like reading your thoughts in every chapter.**

**Thank you for reading and reviewing**

**xx**


	16. Chapter 16

**Another update!! Hope you are still here with me!!! This chapter will have some confrontation..**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 16**

"Ash, did you talk with Ian? Did he tell you what we should do?"

"He said that he would talk with the record and then we could go public. I won't give any interview unless they ask me to."

"So.. are we official official?"

"Yes, we are. I can hold your hand and I can kiss you. And we can have a proper date. Are you sure you are fine with all this?"

"To be true.. No. But I'm willing to try. I am very curious to see what my mother will say once she find out"

"Well.. let's see. She will tell you something like this 'Spencer.. you are with a girl? You are going to hell'

"You were way more kind. My mother would scream. She will tell me about the Bible. And what we are doing is unethical. Can't wait to found out"

"I'll be there with you baby."

"I know Ash. And I love you for this"

We did go public. We did and I was so happy because I wanted for everyone to know that I loved her. That she was mine. Mine and only. When we begun to go out there were people from both sides. From the one side we had those people we told us that we were the most beautiful couple and from the other there were those people that despised us for what we were doing. I didn't have a problem with that. I was used to this kind of behavior. But Spencer wasn't. For the outside world, before me, she was straight, recently divorced, and a mother. Now, she is gay, recently divorced and a mother.

It wasn't easy at the hospital too. Every day she would tell me that although the stuff talked to her she could hear them gossip her when she turned her back. Spencer had a name at this hospital. She is a great doctor and the children love her. When I ask her if she is sorry for being with me and with all the publicity our relationship has she just kiss me and smile. But I know that she is hurting. And I don't know what to do. I just don't know..

And the worst part was her mother of course. Because after that one photo on that magazine they took us another and I don't know where the hell they hide because they always find us in places that are not so crowed. It's like someone spy on us. Like someone know us. I can't explain it. So.. anyway.. Spencer's face now it's in every tabloid. They have pictures of us kissing, holding hands, shopping. So it was time for mama Carlin to say what she thinks. And she did.

We were sitting on Spencer's couch and we were watching tv when Paula Carling showed herself. Yes, she didn't call. She came here. Without any notice. To say she was ok with all this that would be a lie. She stormed inside, while I was still there, yelling and screaming.

"Someone is on the door Spence"

"This time? I don't expect anyone. Ash.. what if it is some paparazzi?"

"They haven't knock our door yet so I don't think it is some paparazzi. Do you want for me to open the door?"

"Could you please baby? If it is some reporter I want it is you who will handle him"

"Of course baby"

"Spencer Evelyn Carlin."

"Ehmm.. no.. It's Ashley Davies"

"Where is Spencer?" before I could tell her where Spencer was Spencer came where we were standing..

"Mom? What are you doing here?"

"WHAT AM I DOING HERE?"

"Could you please not yell? Christine is upstairs and she is sleeping"

"Now you care for your daughter?"

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me. How could you Spencer? How? You have a child for God shakes."

"What's that suppose to mean?" obviously it was something between those so I tried to leave but I wasn't that lucky..

"Ehmm.. maybe I should.."

"No, Ash. You will stay here with me"

"Leave her Spencer. It's between you and me"

"No, mom. Ashley is with me. We are together. So she will stay" I looked at her so she would know that I was ok if she wanted me to leave. I didn't have a problem. But she gave me the look that said 'don't you dare leave me with her'. So I stayed

"Maybe you would like both of you to continue this argue inside the house"

"You are right baby."

"I don't think I can stand this. You. Calling her your baby. It is disgusting"

"You are at my house. My house. My rules. Take it or leave it."

"How you can sleep at night Spencer? How you sleep when you know that you hurt your child?"

"I hurt my child? How I hurt her mom?"

"Being with _her. _You condemn Christine and you don't even know it."

"Oh, shut it mom. Just.. shut up. Don't you dare speak for my child again. You hear me?"

"Do you know what people saying back home? Do you? I can't go out from my house because they ask me about my gay daughter and her rock star girlfriend. How you could do this to me?"

"To you? How I could do this to you? It is my life mom. My. Life. And I am not sixteen anymore. You will never tell me what I should do again. I'm in love with Ashley and she is in love with me."

"In love? How you are in love with another woman?"

"Ahem.. I think you said enough. Now it's my time to speak. Mrs Carlin you have a great daughter. She is an amazing person and an amazing mother. I never saw anyone else with so much love for her child. If you love your daughter you will love her whatever. From what I see you don't love her."

"How you dare. Who do you think you are? Do you think you can talk? You are not a mother and you don't know"

"Do you think so? Maybe I am not but Christine is like a daughter to me and I love her very much. And if I ever have kids I will love them not matter what."

"Spencer, I warn you. If you don't break up with her instant I don't know what I .."

"What mom? You will send me to a gay camp? What? You will throw me outside the house? What? If you haven't realized it I am a grown up woman and not a child anymore. So.. I have to say one thing and then you can go. I won't break up with Ashley. I will not leave her ever. Do you understand? And now you can leave. And please.. don't bother to come here again. You are not welcome"

"Spence?"

"No, Ash. No. If she can't accept who I am and who we are she is not welcomed here"

"Is this you last word?"

"Yes."

"You don't know what you are doing Spencer and I hope you don't regret being with her. It will never be easy."

"Believe me. I will never regret being with Ashley."

"Goodbye then"

"Goodbye"

And.. Paula Carlin left as she came. Like a storm. I have to say that it was an intense scene. I would never believe that Spencer could be like this. I thought she would be more reasonable. But she wasn't. She cut her mother out of her life as I did with mine. Spencer has guts and I love her..

"Baby? Are you ok?"

"I'm fine Ash"

"WOW. Your mother is something"

"Don't I know?"

"Are you ok with all this?"

"Ash.. I love you. I love you. And if she can't accept it she may leave. I don't care. My mother always wanted to control my life. If it wasn't for her I would never be married to Bob."

"Yeah, but you wouldn't have Christine."

"True. But I could have her with you. And she would be ours."

"But she is Spence. What I told to your mother it's true. I love her like she is mine."

"And I want for her to be yours Ash."

"When do you think it's the right time to tell her what we are exactly?"

"She is still young. Do you think she can understand?"

"Well.. we will not say to her about gays and lesbians. We will just say that mommy and Ashley love each other very much."

"I think she already knows that Ash."

"Yeah.. I'll think something"

"We will think something. Ok? We are together"

"Spence.. I know what you are saying but are you sure you are ok with all this? And don't kiss me just to tell me that you are ok. I think I know when you are hurting."

"Ash.."

"Please.. I just want to know that you are ok."

"Baby, I will never think any less for our relationship. Being openly gay it isn't easy but it will be in time. But do you want to know something?"

"What?"

"You know that at the hospital gossip about us."

"Yes.. and that's why I ask you"

"Well.. they are so jealous.. They are jealous because I have a very sexy and famous girlfriend. And I am so haaaaappy.."

"Spencer Carlin.. are you with me only because I am famous?"

"Actually I am with you only for your body"

"You should, because I have a great body.."

"You do baby."

Do I need any proof that Spencer is totally with me in this? No. Because, she pushed her mother out of her life for us. Believe me. I didn't want her to do that. I believe that a child needs her mother no matter what. I wish I could have my mother back. I wish she could understand. I wish she knew better than to judge me. But Christine is very lucky because she has Spencer and now me.

* * *

**TBC**

**I'm sorry this chapter it's shorter than the others. I wanted a confrontation in this chapter. Next chapter will be long as the others.. I hope you liked it.**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**xx**


	17. Chapter 17

**Well hello.. Once again here I am.. Enjoy the new chapter..**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 17**

**Third person POV**

You don't think. You just act. You want something. You just get it. Without questions and anything. I never was like this but when you grow up you realize things. You contemplate with yourself if what you are doing is right or wrong. Maybe some of you think that what I do is wrong. But for me is my job. It pays the bills. Sallow? Maybe. Don't care though. You probably think what my job is. Well.. I am a photographer. What kind? The kind the celebrities hate. A paparazzi. Did I ever do something to regret for? Not really. Because I don't care. My job is to find them when they don't know I am near. To take the best shot. To find their little secrets. And believe me. I have found many many secrets. They think they own the world? No. They don't. And that's why I don't care if someone is hurt because of me. But what if your job meets your past? What you do then? Do you continue? Do you make that shot? Do you contemplate with yourself? In my case no. I take the shot. Hell.. I took the shot and I liked it. In this case we will have more fan than I thought so.. When I saw them together something awaken inside me. Fury? Anger? Sadness? Any feeling I had came back. Now she will regret that she left me..

Ashley's POV

Do you ever think that someone watches you? When you make a step and you think you heard someone behind you but when you turn your back there is no one there? You say 'maybe it's in my head'. In my case though I do believe that it is not in my head. I do believe that someone is watching me. Is watching us. I didn't tell Spencer anything yet because I want to know first. She doesn't need that now. She is much better with this all being my girlfriend thing.

Do you know what the funniest thing is? That I am in a serious relationship like 8 months now and I haven't been in a date with Spencer. Yes, we had dates but inside our houses. I mean a proper date. In a restaurant. Holding her hand, opening the door for her. Paying for her. A perfect date. And we couldn't because we were hiding. Now that we are not I want to take her out. My beautiful girlfriend. My future Mrs Davies.. What?? You thought that I didn't think about it? Oh, believe me I had. For a long time now. I just want to wait for the right time to come. I know she is the one and we are already family and I want to start a new family with her. Yeah, do you remember the Ashley Davies in the past? Forget her. She is not there anymore..

"Hey baby? How are you?"

"Ashhh… how you knew that I needed to hear your voice right now?"

"Don't know. Telepathy maybe?"

"Mmmm.. baby.. I love your voice.."

"I love it too Spence. Are you sure you are ok?"

"Oh,, yes.. baby.. I want that too.. Can't wait to see you at night, to make love to you"

"Spence.. you are loosing me baby. What is going on?"

"Yes… and I want your hands all over me. Touching me.. You know where"

"Ok.. maybe I should call you like 5 minutes later?"

"Hey.. baby" and I heard her laugh.. now I know that something is really going on..

"Spence.. you had your sex voice on. You were ready to have sex with me over the phone"

"Hahaha.. you had to see their faces"

"Eh?"

"When you called I was ready to have a lunch break and there were those nurses that they like to gossip so much and I wanted to give them something to gossip more. Ash.. you had to see their faces. Like really.. They had their mouths open"

"Spence.. what are you? 16? You are a doctor at that hospital"

"So? Don't you know that a hospital is like a little town? They are just jealous of us baby. They think that I'm just the luckiest woman on earth. Not only you are famous but you are hot"

"Spence.. you start to scare me babe"

"Don't be baby. I would never do anything to scare you. You know I love you"

"Yeah.. I do. Too bad that I love you too oh scary one"

"Haha. Funny. So.. what you are doing for the day?"

"Well.. you know. The usual. Singing to make some money"

"Poor baby. It must be really hard"

"It is. But let's change the subject. Tonight. You and me. Alone. On a date. At a restaurant. Wear the sexiest outfit you have"

"Well well well. Are you asking me on a date Ms Davies?"

"You bet your ass I do. I'll come to peak you up at seven. I already made the reservations"

"How you knew that I would be free tonight?"

"You are always free for me babe. And that I know your schedule by hard."

"I hate it that you know me so well."

"You love me"

"That I do. Why don't you come a little earlier so you can sit with Christine while I will be trying to look beautiful for you?"

"I was thinking the same. Wow. You are my soul mate."

"Have you noticed that now?"

"Shut up. I'll be there at six then. Ok?"

"I'll be waiting for you"

"By love"

"By lovely bunny"

"_Spence.."_

"But it is cute"

"I don't do cute. Ok?"

"You are harsh"

"Byeeeee Spence"

"Byeeeee Ash"

**

Let's see. You have your first official date with your girlfriend at the best hotel restaurant. What do you wear? A cocktail dress? A vest with a really mini short? A vest with a low cut jean? A vest with a mini black skirt? Fuck.. I can't wear what I want.. I guess the dress it's more suitable. So I check my wardrobe to see what I have there. I have a lot of dresses because I was in a lot of Grammys.

Well I chose to wear the one with the asymmetric neckline. It's a black mini cocktail dress with a low cut asymmetric neckline which sets off my breasts. And because I am a rock star I want to have some rocky shoes. So I am wearing my black leather upper in a dress platform shootie style with a round, open toe shoes. Rows of delicate vamp and instep straps weave into a braided centre strap. I have my hair up and some down and although my make up is rock it's not that hard rock. Smoky eyes and a light lip gloss. Perfect.

I check my watch and it's already after 5.30pm. Being right in time it's something new that Spencer put to my life. Get my keys and go meet my girls..

I take one last look to myself and go to Spencer's. I don't have to knock because I already have a key. Don't forget. Christine is in the living room painting as always. I really think that she will be a painter some day.

"Hey, baby girl. What are you doing there?"

"Momma" I still can't believe that she is calling me that. And I love it like it's always the first time..

"Yes, baby. So.. what are you painting this time?"

"Tees and sky"

"Let me see.. Well.. for me it has to go to the fridge along with the others"

"Like momma?"

"Very much. Did you give me a kiss?"

"Haha.. No.. mouats"

"That's the best kiss I ever had"

"Ahem.. the best eh?" I heard Spencer's voice and I turned my head to look for my fabulous blond

"Yeah.. the best" I say and look at her in the eyes.

"I thought I heard your voice and I said I should go down to greet my date"

"You thought well." But she was standing still at the stairs and she didn't greet me yet and I wanted for her to greet me "Well.. you have to come down to greet me Spence"

"I just can't take my eyes off of you. You are breath taking baby. Maybe it's better to stay home. I don't want anyone to steal you from me"

"No one could ever steal me from you. Even if you wanted to leave I wouldn't leave you. Now.. what about that kiss?"

She was wearing her robe but she had already her make up fixed as her hair. She had them in those curls I love and her make up was simple and natural as always.. She leaned in and kissed me. A little bit more than 10 seconds but I didn't care. I let my hands travel inside her robe and I was fully aware that she was naked inside. Spencer and her nudeness.

"_Spence.._"

"I was getting ready you know.."

"Really.. you greet me naked and then what you want me to do? Look at you?"

"Well.. then I should get up and starting getting ready"

"I have another thought. What if I come with you and help you to get ready?"

"Don't think so."

"Come on. I should be quick. You won't have to do anything."

"That's the problem. I want to do everything with you. So no. Stay here and watch your daughter"

"_Baby.."_

"I'll be back in ten." She kissed me and left. That woman. She awakes my inner instincts..

"Baby girl. It's you and me again. Let me help you with what you were doing"

Glen was coming to watch Christine. I really like this guy and he is great with Christine. At least she can have him as a father model. We sat there all three of us and waiting for Spencer. After exactly fifteen minutes Spencer was ready. She was sexy. She was beautiful. She was hot. Does she afraid if someone steals me from her? It's all the way around. What if someone steal her from me? She was wearing a silk ocean blue dress which was very tight in the right places if you know what I mean.

"Ash.. you are drooling"

"Come again?"

"That good?"

"Are you sure you are a mother? Because if you are you are a very hot sexy mother"

"I take that as a compliment"

"You should. You are perfect"

"So are we ready?"

"Maybe we should stay at home. What if some waitress come and want to woo you?"

"Woo me? Nice Ash.. Come on silly. Glen we are leaving. Thank you so much again"

"You are welcome. Don't worry. I have it all under control. You both look amazing and hot. Maybe you are one of the hottest couple I know. Have fan"

"Thanks Glen" we both said unison.

Our date was uneventful for once. Although it was a well known restaurant I asked the metre to take us to a quite table. Ok, we were official together now but once again, imagine Branjelina eating at the next table with you. Yeah, what I thought..

"Do you like?"

"I love it baby. You shouldn't have"

"I wanted to. And I wanted to for some time now."

"Ash.. I love you. I love you so much."

"I love you too baby. I love both you and Christine so very much. You are my family you know"

"And you are a family to us. As three."

"And maybe more than three?" I want another kid with Spencer. Maybe two. I love big families.

"Ash.." she looked at me and I could read her so very well..

"Spence.. you know how I feel about you. You are the one for me. The one I imagine myself grow old. And I want to be with you forever and start a new life together. What I am saying is.. Spencer.. will you marry me?" that was the right time. I didn't planned it but I knew it was the right time..

"Yes. Yes. Oh, my God, baby. Yes.. A million times yes"

"Baby.. you made me the happiest woman. So yes?"

"Yes. I will marry you Ms Ashley Davies"

"Well, I suppose this is for you then"

I put the ring on her engagement finger. When I was looking for a ring I was looking for the perfect ring. And I found it when I saw it. A band of bead-set round brilliant diamonds. Simple and perfect.

"Ash.. baby.. it's perfect" she cried when I put it on her finger. And I cried. We both cried. It was the most happiest day of my life.. And tonight I would make love to her to once again but this time we would be engaged.

"Now, we have to buy another one for you. I want them to see that you are taken"

"Spence.. you are cute when you are jealous"

"I'm not jealous. They keep hitting on you when they know that you are with me. Hope now they won't or else I'll kick their asses."

"Yea, not jealous at all"

"Shut up, fiancée"

"Fiancee. I like it"

"Get used to it"

Before I continue teasing her her phone rang and I saw her telling me it was Glen..

"Hey Glen. What's up?" she didn't say anything else. She just stayed there with her eyes open, still holding her phone.

"Spence? What is it?"

"Christine."

"What happened to Christine?" she was still not breathing. I was starting to scare.. "Spence. What happened to Christine?"

"Kidnapped."

"WHAT??" I screamed and everyone there turned their faces. I could care less now

"Ashley they took her. Christine."

"Let's go." She couldn't move. "Spence. Come on. We are leaving."

I had to shake her up so she could come back to me. I think I was loosing her but I had to be the stronger one here. I called Ian and then I called the police. I am scare and I really don't know what I have to do..

* * *

**TBC**

**Well?? What do you think? I want to read your thoughts. What is that they say? Writers block? Yeah.. I don't have any. My imagination is something else..**

**Reviews are always welcome and I am always happy to read them..**

**xx**


	18. Chapter 18

**Listening and writing!! Nice inspiration to hear classical music! Actually I hear The Piano soundtrack. Very nice if you haven't heard it! So.. I hope I can answer your questions in this chapter!**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 18**

**Third person's POV**

_Few hours ago_

_Patience is a virtue. And I have patience. That's why I am a photographer. Would any of you stay hours and hours and wait to take a shot? No. That's what I thought so.. All these years I had patience. She left me to move there. Actually her mother took her. She caught us one day and she flipped. We tried to keep in touch but being young we couldn't. We drifted. But I never forget her. I knew what she did with her life. I knew where she went to study for college. I moved there with her. I saw her falling in love. I saw her marry a man. I saw her having a child. But always thought she could be mine again. I just had patience. But when I saw them together. When I saw her with Ashley Davies then I lost my mind. ASHLEY DAVIES? I couldn't have her back because she was with that thing? With that trash? All these long I was trying to separate them. To find little things that would make them break up. What I told you before? I know secrets. And their secret was that they weren't public yet. One photo and she would be mine again. But noooo… Noooo.. They were still together.. And very public.. I had to think something better._

"_I want you to come here in ten"_

"_Paulie what do you want?"_

"_Don't ask and come here"_

"_I can't"_

"_Shut up James. You owe me and if you don't you know what I will do"_

"_When you will stop threating me?"_

"_Never. I want you to help me with something"_

"_What?"_

"_If you come here you will find out"_

"_I'll be there in fifteen"_

_Now my plan. My plan was simple. What Spencer loves more in her life? Her daughter. If I would take her then they would break up. Then she would be mine again. James was an old friend. Not best friend. He was threatened by some scamps because he owed them some money. And I helped him by taking some photos of them killing someone. So he owed me for saving his life._

"_What do you want?"_

"_Sit"_

"_Thank you for being polite Paulie"_

"_Shut up and hear. I want you to help me kidnap someone"_

"_Are you serious?"_

"_Yes."_

"_Who?"_

"_An old friend's child"_

"_A child Paulie? A child? I can help you with everything but not with this"_

"_If you are not then say goodbye to your life"_

"_For how long you owe my life? Because you are the same with them you know"_

"_Will you help me? It's your choice. Dead or alive"_

"_When?"_

"_In an hour. I want you to take down the person who will open the door. It's a male. So when we get inside you punch him and we take the kid."_

"_You thought everything eh?"_

_Of course I thought everything. I had months to plan it._

**Ashley's POV**

I can't believe what is happening. No. I can't. Spencer is still in shock. I tried to make her talk to me but she closed herself. I don't know what to do. Christine. Oh my God. My baby girl. If I find who did this to her he is dead. And I am not kidding.

"Spence? Baby? Talk to me please. We will find her. I promise" nothing. She doesn't even look at me back. I hold her hands in mine and kiss them..

"I promise you baby that we will find her."

We were outside Spencer's house. Ian was already there. I called the police and I gave them her description.

"Ashley, Spencer. I… I… don't know what to say. They.. got her.. I.."

"Ian? Can you please stay with Spencer?"

"Of course Ashley"

I took Glen inside the kitchen. I wanted some answers. And I needed them fast.

"Glen.. please tell me what happened."

"Ashley.. how is Spencer?"

"Not good. Now tell me"

"It was almost right after you left. Fifteen minutes later and I heard someone knock on the door. I thought it was you guys and I opened it. I thought you forgot something. The last thing I remember is two persons. A man with his fist on my face and a woman behind him. I collapsed and when I waked up I tried to compose myself and see what they took. I thought they were buglers. But when I got upstairs to check for Christine she wasn't there. They took her Ashley. They took my niece. And it's my fault. Oh my God."

Glen was in no better state than Spencer. Actually he talked. Spencer was lost. What I have to do is to find Christine.

"I will find her Glen. Don't worry."

"How Ashley. You don't know who took her"

"Do you remember anything else of these two?"

"It was late at night.. I didn't see them well."

"Try Glen. If we know how they looked we can give their description at the police to search for them"

"Well, I saw some characteristics of the girl. She had long blond hair. And she wore black outfit."

"Nice, Glen. What about the guy?"

"Same outfit. Stern look. Sorry Ashley. I can't think of anything else"

"It's ok"

I heard a knock on the door and I rushed out to see who was.

"Police Ms"

"Yes, please. Come in"

"You called and told that your daughter was kidnapped"

"Actually she is not my daughter. But it's like a daughter to me officer."

"Where is her mother?"

"Right there"

Spencer was still. She hasn't moved till I brought her home. It's when she saw the officer that she blinked her eyes. Maybe hope?

"Excuse Mrs"

"It's Ms"

"I'm sorry. Could you please tell us about your daughter? What did she wear? Give us a recent photo of her?"

"She was wearing her pjs. She has long blond hair and blue eyes. She is 3 years old. She is afraid of the dark." Spencer was crying. She was crying. And I was hurting. I run to her to hold her.

"Baby. It's ok. I'm here. We will find her" when I called her baby I saw the officer's look. And it wasn't time for that.

"Please, officer. Can you find her?"

"We will try our best Ms. If we have something we will call you. Do you know why someone who had a reason to take her? Someone who took her to ask ransom?"

And then Spencer gave me that look. The look I was afraid off. It wasn't my fault. It wasn't my fault. It wasn't my fault..

"Maybe they want ransom. Probably they know about Ms Davies here. Maybe they will call you and when they will we will caught them. Officer Luis will stay here with you."

"Thank you officer"

It is not my fault.

"Spence?"

"Not now Ashley"

"Spence. I know what you are thinking and .."

"What am I thinking Ashley? What? I can't think because my daughter is kidnapped. What if they have her because of you? What if they harm her? What if they kill her? Oh my God."

"Spence.. Don't think like that. Please."

"Don't you tell me how to think. Ashley please.. Leave me alone because right now you don't want to know what I think."

"Spencer?"

"Leave me alone. Just.. All of you leave me the fuck alone"

And she is gone. If I know her right she regrets being with me but she didn't tell me. Yet. But we have to stay together in this. As we always do. If I have to go out there and bring Christine back, I will.

"Ashley. She doesn't mean anything. She is just hurting."

"I know Glen. It's ok. I'll go to Christine's room."

"Ok."

I didn't know what I was doing to Christine's room. I just wanted to lay at her bed. To smell her scent. My baby girl. I had to find her. I had my hands under her pillow when I caught something. I took it and it was a photo of me, Spencer and Christine. It wasn't ours because we didn't smile on the camera. No. We were on the beach having fun. And it was someone else that took that photo. Now all have sense. The strange feeling I had that someone was watching us. And it was for so long. It was my fault then. They have Christine because of me. Because I am a fucking famous star. I let my tears fall down my face. It was my fault.

I held the picture so tight that ink was in my hands. Ink? Photos don't have ink. I turned the picture behind and it was something written.

'_Come here and you will find her.__ Don't bring police'_

Was it a message? Probably. But what if it was some trap? I had to take the chance. If my baby girl was there I had to go. I had to bring her back to us.

"Ashley where are you going?"

"Out. To clear my head Glen. I'll be back"

"Ms Davies you shouldn't get out"

"Officer, please. Do your job and leave me do mine"

Spencer wasn't there to know that I left the house. "I'm coming baby girl"

The address they had wasn't too far from Spencer's house. That was strange. Maybe it was some stalker or anything. But why he/she left that picture? And under Christine's pillow? I guess we will find out because I am here..

I see the lights turned off. I try to look inside the house but I can't see anything. I try to go behind the house. Only a light lamp is turned on and I can see some movement. I see a man and a woman. It's like Glen said. Long blond hair. I can't see Christine though. Maybe they have her upstairs.

I look outside to see if I can climb anything to get to the window. Unfortunately there is nothing. They only way is to knock the door and prepare for the worst.

After knocking the door I can hear some whispers but no one is opening the door. So I knock again. When I left Spencer's house I changed to a simpler outfit and had my hat on. I didn't want them to recognize me if..

"_Don't open the door"_I heard a girl voice from inside

"_Paulie.. you are being ridiculous" _Paulie? Who is Paulie? That name reminds me something but I can't figure it out. So I knock the door again.

"_Don't open_" but the door was already opened and I was already in. He didn't try to say 'yes'. I pushed him back the wall where he hit his head and pointed them with my finger inside my pocket like it was a gun.

"Tell me where you have my daughter now"

"What?"

"You heard me. Now or else I'll blow your fucking minds off"

"Ashley Davies. Please. Like I don't know you don't have a gun" this girl is fucking annoying.

"How do you know me?"

"Let's see. Your face is everywhere. So.. You need to ask me that?"

"Tell me where Christine is and I promise I won't hurt you"

"You won't hurt me? YOU WON'T HURT ME? You already did Davies when you took her from me"

"What are you saying you fucking nuts?"

"You have some nerve"

"My patience is running out"

"She is fine. How is_ she_?"

"Who?"

"Spencer of course"

"Spencer? How do you know Spencer? Were you spying on us?"

"It is my job you know."

"You are a paparazzi"

"Well done. You are clever after all."

"Why you did all of these?"

"Isn't it obvious? Spencer belongs to me. And every fucking time I am there to make her mine again someone gets in the way"

"Let me tell you this. .Crazy"

"Maybe. But you don't love her as I do"

"Paulie. Yes. You are her. Her first girlfriend."

"Did she talk about me?"

"Vaguely"

"I told you she should be with me"

I couldn't take it anymore. She was irritating, ironic, and crazy. If I had to pass her to get to Christine I would do it with no second thought.

"Yeah, nice chatting with you but I am here to take my daughter back"

"Well.. I have another thought. What if I kill you, toss your body somewhere and then bring Christine back to Spencer. Yeah, I like this better"

"You bitch.."

I stormed at her. Pushing her on the wall. She gave me some punches on my face. Actually she has a hard right crose. We are struggling inside the kitchen. She pulled me from my hair and pushed my head on the kitchen's table. Over and over again. That hurt. Really bad. I had to push her so she could let me. She was a tough bitch. And pushing her back was my big mistake. She had a knife in her hands showing to me.

"Now what Davies? Now what you do?"

"What I know best. Kicking some ass. Your ass"

We played the cat and mouse game. In this case, feeling hopeless, I was the mouse and she was the cat. I just needed to take the knife from her hands.

"Paulie?"

"James?"

That took her of guard. Her partner was there. And I had to make the move now. They were two against one. I had to take the knife from her. I tried to grab it but she was holding it very tight. Damn she is strong. I was loosing ground. I could see the knife coming on me. It was now between us. And then I felt it. She stubbed me. That bitch stubbed me. But I didn't fell alone. She was with me. We laid there. And her blood was on my blouse.

"I'm sorry Paulie."

"Wh-at.. you.. did?" I couldn't speak. I was hurting. I was stubbed.

"I'm sorry. I didn't want to take your daughter. She threatened me if I didn't. That's why I had the photo there for you to see."

"It.. was.. you?"

"She is upstairs. I'll bring her to you."

I was really hurting. But I had to bring Christine back. I had to bring her back to her mother. Even if I died..

When he brought her down it was like she was just awaken. And I was trying to stand up. Blood was covering my entire blouse now. And I couldn't stop it..

"Momma?"

"Hey.. baby"

"Vava?"

"Yes, vava baby. Come"

I tried to see where he was but I couldn't see him anywhere. He probably just left and I had to do the same now. I tried to walk to my car but every step I made I was falling down from pain.

"momma?"

"I'm.. ok.. ba-by. Get.. inside.." I said between breaths. I hope I stay alive till we are back..

While driving I felt my eyes closing and I was trying really hard to have them open. In five minutes we were home. I had to.. try.. to.. stay alive.. for her..

We were here. I found her as I promised Spencer. She could have her daughter back..

"Baby.. go.. inside.. mommy"

"momma?"

"Go.. inside.. baby.. momma.. loves you.."

I heard her opening the door. My senses were leaving me. My eyes were closed. And I let my body fall on the drivers sit. Until the last thing I heard and I just opened my eyes to see her calling my name..

"Ash? ASH? ASHLEY"

And then black. At least what I saw last was my angel.

* * *

**TBC**

**Nope.. Not the end. I have more to write and for you more to read. I hope I answered some questions. But if I hadn't I'm very glad to answer them.. Hope you liked it. It's the longer I wrote..**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**xx**


	19. Chapter 19

**Hey guys.. Thank you all so much for loving this story! It means a lot!! As for me I caught a cold!! Every spring and summer I am always ill. How? I don't know! Anyway! Another news.. If you didn't know our favorite girl, aka Ashley, is having a role on 90210 season 2. Just so you know.. Enjoy the new chapter..**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 19**

**Spencer's POV**

I can't believe what is happening. No. It is all a lie. It can't be. My mother wasn't right. My choices don't affect my child. No. Being with Ashley is not affecting Christine. But it was, because of her Christine was kidnapped. No. I must not think like that. I love her like I never loved anyone. But why now? Why it should be happen to us. To me?

Ashley was there for me but I didn't want anyone near me. I just wanted everything to stop. To vanish. For Christine to come back to me. I just wanted to be alone..

"Spencer?" it was Glen. Even Glen was making me angry right now. He was with her when they took her. He supposed to watch her..

"Spencer.. please.. Don't shut us out. We need to be together in this"

"Together? How Glen?"

"We have to be there for each other. I hurt as much as you do."

"You hurt? Did you lose your child Glen? Did you? No. So don't tell me that we hurt the same."

"Spencer.. she is my niece. My sister's daughter. We share the same blood. Please don't do this. And please don't shut Ashley out. She is hurting too" Ashley.. I didn't want to be like this but questions come and go in my mind and I just can't.

"Spencer I know what you are thinking. Please.. it's not Ashley's fault. And she left over an hour ago and she didn't come back yet. I know she is hurting too but…"

"What? Where did she go?"

"She said she wanted to clear her mind. I thought she would go for a walk but she didn't return yet."

Ashley. Why did she have to leave? I was a total bitch to her when I knew she just wanted to be here with me. And now she left and I don't know where she is.

"Glen? Did she tell you anything else?"

"No. It was strange actually. She took her jacket and got out. But she had something in her eyes.. A determination or something. I don't know.."

"She couldn't.."

"She couldn't what Spencer?"

"No. She just couldn't."

"Spencer.. you are loosing me here"

"Ashley told me that she would find Christine no matter what. What if she is out there looking for her Glen?"

"She couldn't Spencer. How? She doesn't know where they took Christine"

"Obviously you don't know Ashley as much as I do. She could do anything and I mean anything to protect us. And I.. I pushed her Glen.."

"Ssss.. it's ok. It's Ashley we are talking about"

Before I answer to that I heard my door. I run in case it was Ashley and what I found what something I never believed that I would see again..

"Oh my God. Baby.. Thank you God. Oh baby. Come here" I had her in my arms and I didn't want to leave her out of my sight. She was there like nothing happened, watching me with those beautiful eyes.

"Mommy? Momma is out"

"Ashley? Where is she baby?"

"Out the car? Mommy? Momma boo boo"

"Glen? Ashley is out. Stay here with Christine"

"Is she ok?"

"I don't know Glen. I don't know"

I run out to see Ashley's car. I saw her. Her body wasn't moving and her head was resting to the driver's sit. What I saw.. she.. was in a pool of blood. Her blood..

"Oh my God. Ash? ASH? ASHLEY?'

Nothing. I saw her opening her eyes for a second and closing them right after. She will not die in my hands. I won't leave her..

"Baby? Don't die on me. Do you hear me?" I took her body in my arms and putting her down so I could see from where the blood was coming. She had a deep wound in her abdomen. She was stubbed. Oh my God. Who did this to her?

"Ms? We have to call an ambulance for Ms Davies. Does she have her senses?"

"I can feel her heart beat but it is slow. I already call them. They will be here in a minute."

"We need to ask her how she knew where to find your daughter and …"

"Officer. My fiancée is laying here in blood, deeply hurt and you are saying you need to ask her how she found my daughter? I DON'T KNOW IF SHE WILL MAKE IT TILL THE HOSPITAL"

"Ms.. I know what you are saying but…"

"No but. My daughter is here. And this woman here saved her. So no need buts" before I have another confrontation with him the ambulance was here to take her."

"Where are you taking her?"

"Are you family?"

"I'm her fiancée"

"St Mary's. Do you want to come with us Ms?"

"I'll follow you. I know where it is. I'm working there"

Why my life has so much drama? Why I can't be with the one I love the way I want to?

"Glen? They took Ashley to the hospital. Please.. take care of Christine."

"Spencer? We can come with you"

"It's not a place for Christine"

"Mommy?"

"Yes, sweetie?"

"I wan to see momma" I knew she loved Ashley. We both loved Ashley. We were family. And Christine saw her like this. She wanted to see for her own that her momma was fine.

"Ok. We will go to see momma. But you'll have to be careful there. Ok? Glen. Let's go"

I took my car and I drove like a maniac to the hospital. I just wanted to be there. And as a doctor I had my ways.

"Janice, they brought Ashley Davies here like 10 minutes ago. Where did they take her?"

"Ms Carlin.. I.. don't know.."

"Janice what happened?"

"When they brought her in she was already in shock. She crushed and they took her to the surgery immediately."

"Glen stay with Christine and I will come to find you"

"Ok."

If I ever lose her.. I don't know. I will lose my mind. And the last thing she remembers from me is being a bitch to her.. If only I could tell her again how much I love her..

I was there with the other doctors. I saw they were trying to save her. The knife touched vital organs. Unfortunately they had to remove her spleen. Seeing her like this it broke my heart. I was used to her smile, to her strength. She always felt so warm. And now I touch her hand and it's too cold.

She was in surgery for five hours. They lost her two times but every time she was coming back. I don't know what it is but I could feel her inside the surgery. It's something we both feel for each other. Whenever she was crushing I knew she would come back because she once told me that she would always come back to me.

She was in the ER and they wouldn't let anyone to see her. Even me. But as a doctor I could stay for a while. I just wanted to feel that warm again that I missed so much. And I needed her back. I needed her to come back to me.

"Baby? Please? Come back to me. Christine needs you. I need you. We both need you. So come back to your family"

I knew she could hear me. She just couldn't speak. And I just needed to tell her that…

"I love you baby. Do you hear me? I love you Ms Ashley Davies and you are my rock star. And we have a wedding to plan. Remember? You won't leave me. I won't let you"

I could swear that I saw her smile but my mind was playing tricks. I wish I could stay here with her but they wouldn't let me.

"I have to go for now baby. But I will be here. I will be outside waiting for you to wake up"

Of course I couldn't leave her. I would never leave her. I told Glen what happened inside and of course he didn't want to leave me alone. I took Christine in my arms letting my head lost in her neck crying..

"Mommy? You cry?"

"Yes, baby"

"Why mommy?"

"Momma is very hurt baby. And now she sleeps"

"She wake up"

"Oh, baby girl. I really hope so"

"She wake up, mommy. You know why?"

"Why sweetie?"

"Momma love us"

"She does baby. And we love her very much and she knows that"

"Not cry mommy"

"Give me my honey kisses"

Why when I have my one girl I lose the other? Why I can't have them both? For now I just have to wait.. Wait for Ashley to wake up..

* * *

**TBC**

**Well.. I had to write Spencer's POV of course considering all the feelings and the drama. Thank you all for reading and reviewing.. It means a lot.. Hope I won't disappoint you..**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**xx**


	20. Chapter 20

**Well.. hi guys! This is an early update because I don't know if I can post during the day and I don't want for you to wait and I don't want for me not to write! So… here is the new chapter.. Enjoy!!**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 20**

What is it when you die? How it would be if you were dead? Will you see your love ones? I had this kind of thoughts when I was younger and doing stuff. You know what stuff.. But I didn't expect this. I didn't expect being here. Waiting. And the strange thing is that I know what I am waiting. I am waiting for her to find me. To bring me back.

What I have with Spencer it's something that I can not describe it to you. Now I know when they say, that when you will find your soul mate you will know. And we are soul mates. I sense her whenever she is round. I know when she is hurt. I just know that kind of things that she doesn't need to tell me.

Last thing I remember is seeing her beautiful eyes. After that I don't remember anything from being conscious. But I was there and I saw her. Did you ever hear of people going out from their bodies for seconds and then coming back? That's how I saw her inside the surgery. I crushed. Two times. And I came back both times because she was there. And I just couldn't leave yet. I promised her after all.

I don't know if I am in coma. I know that I can't speak or move. That bitch stubbed me in my guts. I really hope she is not dead because if she is not I will kill her with my bare hands. Well.. if I ever get up, or wake up.

We all have seen those medical series. I don't know how to call them. Whatever. They always said that when someone is in coma they can hear. And I did. I did and I wanted to move just to reach her hand and tell her that I was here. We were here together. But I couldn't. She cries and I can't do anything. I am just staying here in the dark not able to see those beautiful eyes I love. To let my hand touch her straight, silk, blond hair. To kiss those luscious lips of her. I am just here. Waiting..

"_Baby.. please wake up. Ash.. I can't not__ be with you. Come back to me please. I need you.."_

It's Spencer.. I'm here baby.. I hear you.. But I can't move..

"_You promised me that you will never leave me. Stick to your promise.. Our daughter needs you.. Christine asks for you every day.."_

My baby girl.. Oh.. no.. if she isn't dead that bitch I will kill her not with my bare hands.. No .. I will torture her that she laid her hands over my child..

"_Ash.. we have a life together. Me, you and our daughter. And a family of our own. Maybe a little Ashley running all over the place.."_and then I knew I could speak because I let the words speak for themselves

"What… if I want a little.. Spencer?" I said whispering because I still couldn't speak very well..

"Ashley? Oh, my God.. Baby.. you wake up. Oh, my God. Wait.. I have to find the doctor.."

"I can.. wait.."

"Oh, my God.. Oh, baby.. You scared me.." she kissed my forehead and left to find my doctor I suppose?

Five minutes later she was back with my doctor. He seemed like a nice guy.

"Ms Davies. I see that you wake up"

"Obviously.. unless you are dead.. and I am dead.." I saw Spencer laugh. I am sure she missed my sarcasm..

"No you are not dead Ms Davies. But you were in shock after the surgery. You were out for two weeks"

"Two.. weeks?"

"Yes.. We didn't know when you would wake up."

"Me neither doctor.." and I looked at Spencer who were looking at me.

"Well let me see the monitor to see how we are.. It seems that everything is fine Ms Davies. You will feel your throat a little bit dry and maybe a little pain when you will try to get up. We had to remove your spleen because the wound was deep. Other than that you will be fine."

"Thank you doctor"

"My pleasure. I leave you two. Spencer, whatever you need call me"

"Bye, John. Thank you for everything"

Now I could be alone with my beautiful girl again..

"Well.. now it is the two of us baby.." I said and Spencer moved her body to mine and wrapped me to her hands crying.. I tried to hold her to reassure her that I was here now..

"Don't cry baby. It's ok. I'm here now"

"I know Ash.. I know.. But you weren't.. You.. just.. couldn't wake up.. And I didn't know… what to do.." she said between sobs. I hated seeing her cry..

"But I am here. See.. Maybe without a spleen but nevertheless I am here.." I saw her smile and I was better..

"Don't make me smile.. It is serious.. When I found you like that I lost my mind Ash.. You were laying in your car, motionless, and then at the hospital I lost you.."

"It was you all the time you know.."

"What do you mean?"

"I was coming back every time for you"

"Ash.."

"I know you were there. And I knew that I had to be there for you. For us.."

"Oh, Ash.. please don't leave me again. Please.."

"If you promise you won't leave me too"

"I promise.. I promise.."

"Well.. now.. what about that little Spencer we were talking. Wanna start now?"

"Asshh.. you are something.. First you are still recovering and second you can't really do that. You don't have the right equipment…"

"You have to be a spasm.."

"I love you."

"Even if I have an organ less?"

"I love everything in you. Even without an organ you are still my rock star"

"And I love you Ms Carlin. Very much"

We kissed and I knew how much I missed kissing her the moment she touched my lips. Before we let our tongues touch with each other's we were interrupted by our family..

"Well well.. Someone waked up and start working her moves" that was Aiden.. He was here with Kyla. And Glen was here with Christine..

"I was going to do that but obviously you run into us.."

"Oh, Ash.. You scared the crap out of us. Don't do that ever again.."

"Ashley.. I have to say that you love being the queen"

"Well.. thank you oh sister of mine. What are you? The princess?"

"You better your ass I am a loyalty as well. Ash.. please don't do that again. Like ever.. Even you are a bitch you are still my sister.."

"I promise. Cross my heart. Where is my favorite girl?" Glen was holding her and she seemed ready to cry..

"Momma?"

"Yes, baby."

She looked back at Spencer and when she nodded she told Glen to leave her down. She came next to me and touched my arm that didn't have needles..

"momma? You ok?"

"I'm fine baby girl. How are you?"

"Fine momma. I pait this for you"

"For me? Let's see.." it was a big sun rising from a mountain. A figure were still seeing the sun surrounded by trees like she was waiting for something.. "Baby.. this is perfect." I try not to cry but all this make me softy. And being softy was a new thing to me with my girls and I liked it a lot..

"Momma? Pease not leave us.."

"I promise baby girl. Give momma a big kiss" Spencer took her in her arms and pick her up so she could kiss me..

"Guys.. I'm so sorry but she has to rest. It's been a long day." The doctor inside Spencer spoke and I knew she was still worried.. Spencer talked to Glen and I suppose she told him to look after Christine..

"Ok.. Ash.. see you tomorrow. Bye" Kyla said and then one by one kissed me and left me alone in my room. Well alone with Spencer.

"Alone again."

"Not for long baby. I meant it when I said that you need to rest. You just waked up.."

"Can't you stay here with me till I fell asleep?"

"Of course Ash.."

"Can you hold me? Can you please come and lay here with me?"

I didn't need to say that again. Spencer was there holding me as I asked her. I felt her kisses on my neck and it wasn't something sensual. She was letting me to know she loved me and she needed me as much I needed her..

* * *

**TBC**

**Sorry if the last two chapters are shorter than usual but an update is an update. Thank you all for reviewing and reading. Wish me to get well soon because my throat it's hurting like hell.. Have a nice day and night..**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**xx**


	21. Chapter 21

**Well.. what can I say? I am ill and I am so addicted to writing this story that I'm posting again.. Have a nice day and hope you like this chapter as well..**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 21**

The doctors said baby steps. Obviously they don't know me and that I don't know what means slow. I'm fastly Ashley.. I am always ahead of anything. Ahead of everyone. And being in this condition it makes me suffer. I still can't walk as I could. Well when you have someone stubbed you you clearly can't. But as stubborn as I am I tried. And every time I was making myself to reach the highest level. Well.. when Spencer wasn't here because she always yelled when I was trying to walk more than I should. And don't tell her that she was right.. It hurts..

I can't believe that I am still here. Breathing. Talking. Kissing my beautiful fiancée. The last days what I am thinking is sex. Yes. I want to have sex with Spencer. I want to feel her. To touch her. And I tried. Believe me I tried. But she is so prude. It is not a big deal to have sex at this hospital. In Grey's Anatomy everyone do it. So why don't we? But she is irreversible. Damn.. and I am so horny.

Spencer is working today a night shift.. So maybe I can persuade her. Somehow.. I have my ways with her. And I have found all her buttons..

"Ms Davies you can stop now. You walked enough"

"Oh, come on. I can't stay still. I'm bored"

"I know. You have to walk for 10 minutes every three hours. You already walked more than that and it's the first hour. You can't.."

"I get it. Gosh.. you are a very boring person Mr"

"Is she a bad girl Ryan?"

"No Ms Carlin. She is the best patient"

"Oh, come on. Tell her the truth. She will find it anyway" Spencer looked at me like I was a child. Like she told me with her eyes 'I told you not to touch this'

"What you did again Ash?"

"Nothing. I just did my physical therapy as doctor said"

"And..?"

"And.. I walked more than I should"

"Ash.. what did I tell you? You can't do what comes in your mind. That's how you get to this position"

Obviously Spencer was still mad and hurt that I did what I did. She was clearly happy that Christine was back and me alive. But she made it clear that if I wasn't alive she would kill me for doing this. Ryan saw us in this kind of situation and decided that the best for him was to leave.

"Spence.."

"Ashley, let's go to your room" she helped me walking back. She was sad. We haven't talked yet about what happened. I was still in recovery and we both didn't want to discuss it. But now I suppose it was time. She needed answers and I needed to tell her what happened. I hope she takes it well. I wouldn't though..

"Spence.."

"Ash.. why you did this? Why you had to go out there all alone and hurt yourself? Why you have to do irrational things?"

" Spence.. I didn't think."

"No. You didn't. And you could be dead Ash. You could be dead. And.. I can't even think of that"

"I'm sorry. But I promised you that I would find her. So if I had a chance to find her I would sacrifice myself just to bring her back."

"And what? You would bring her back and you would be dead?"

"If it was for her to be ok I would be glad to die"

"Ash.."

"No Spence. I mean it. If I have to die just to protect you two then I will die thousands times. Because you are my life"

"ASH YOU ARE OUR LIFE." She was crying. Well I didn't see her burst all these days..

"I'm sorry Spence.."

"Don't you ever do that again."

"I can not promise that"

"Ash.. promise me now"

"Spence.."

"I mean it. Whatever you have to do we will do it together"

"Ok." Like I could ever say not to this woman..

"How you knew?"

"I found a picture of us three under Christine's pillow and a message written behind. I had to check this out. I couldn't stay here and wait. And those officers.. Yeah.. Assholes.."

We stood in my room together. I told her everything from Paulie to James. What they did and how I got stubbed. Spencer didn't say anything. She just looked at me but her look was blank.

"Baby? Are you ok?"

"I.."

"Spence?"

"Pau-lie? Did.. she .. do.. all..of this?" I couldn't say that again. So I just nodded

"It is ok now"

"How Ash? How it is ok? My obviously crazy ex-girlfriend stubbed my current girlfriend, kidnapped my daughter and stalking us all this time. She was stalking me way before. Oh, my God.."

"Spence it's ok."

"It is my fault. It is my fault that you are here. That Christine was.." she was rambling. So I just stopped her with a kiss.. Way to stop someone.. It gets you kiss them..

"Baby.. Shut up.. It is no one's fault. You hear me? It was HER fault. Hers and only. She was crazy Spence. Paranoid. Thank God your mother caught you and you all moved. Who knows what would happen if you were still with her. I have to personally call your mother and tell her that I love her"

"Yeah.. I would like to see you trying"

"Don't tempt me baby."

"We have to give a description to the police and tell them where to find the body.."

"Well.. I hope she is still there"

"What do you mean Ash?"

"Well.. all I know is that she was stubbed and then I took Christine and left. I know that James didn't turn back. So I hope she is dead because if I find her.."

"Ash.. what if she is alive? What if she comes near us again? You said she is a photographer."

"I'll have a personal guard watch your house full time"

"And what about yours?"

"Spence.. she wants you, not me."

"Ash.. I would feel safer if you were with us"

"Hm.. is that a proposition my sweetheart?"

"It's a I want you with me because I can't stand the thought of being alone without you. So?"

"Well.. I'll have to think about it"

"Ash.."

"Ok ok.. You are bossy"

"You know you like it"

"I tend to forget it.. It is months since you did something bad with me"

"Ash.. it's only been three weeks. Two you were in coma and one in recovery."

"You say potato. I say potatoe."

"Do you know how much I love you?"

"Care to share?"

We kissed as we couldn't do anything else. This girl always finds a way to get away from me. Well we will see if she gets away when I am healed one hundred per sent. I will not let her get out of the room. Oh.. I crave for that day..

"Spence.. just so you know.. when I will be back to myself again I'm just saying that you need to take three days off"

"And why is that?"

"Because, soon to be Mrs Davies I will blow your mind out from sexing you. That's why"

"Is that a threat?"

"Oh, believe me.. That is a promise. Keep it in mind. One week in this fucking state and you will be mine."

"Well.. if you put it like that I can't wait Ms Davies to have you in my arms again"

Now one week seems like a year..

* * *

**TBC**

**Sorry guys for this short chapter but I just needed to write! Thank you for all your wonderful reviews! Till the next chapter.. you know what you will read next.. Spashley alone time..**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**xx**


	22. Chapter 22

**Hello…. How are you guys?? Friday at last! That means that I can stay up till late and wake up at noon!!! Perfect!! I hope you have fun this weekend!!**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 22**

You know that time goes by really fast. A really good physicist said that time doesn't exist. When I am with my family I know that time does not exist. We just are. But what about when we are not? What about when we have to be out there and answer to questions we don't really want to answer?

The one week I was expected to come came so fast. The weeks I've been here I never saw paparazzis who wanted to take a photo of me. Who knew? Maybe Ian told them not to step inside the hospital? Maybe Spencer wanted to protect me? But two weeks being here were over and I had to come back to reality. To this constant exposure of my life. I had to give answers. Because now that I leaving the hospital there are outside and waiting for me.

"Ash? Are you ok sweetie?"

"Really? I don't know Spence. The thing is what we are telling them?"

"Not much."

"But they found that I was here."

"Do you want me to be the one to talk?"

"I want us to do this together"

"Hold my hand"

We held hands and stepped outside. Walked into reality. Flashes from cameras, reporters, cameras, too many people..

"_Mrs Davies why you have been here?"_

"_Ashley, what happened?"_

"_Who stubbed you?"_

"_Did you get into a fight?"_

They were asking too many questions the same time. For once I didn't know what to do, because for those two weeks I was safe inside here and I didn't have to tell anything to anyone.

"_Spencer, how you hang in there?"_

Now they were asking Spencer. I put her in a situation that wasn't for her and it wasn't fair. I had to step front. I had to protect her..

"Hey guys. Here. You can ask me."

"_Ashley what happened?"_

"I was stubbed by a lunatic"

"_Do you know who it was?"_

"Yes, I know. But it doesn't matter now"

"_We heard that you propose"_

"How on earth did you know that?" I saw Spencer's look and we were ok. I could tell them. It was ok. Either way I could protect them. And I already made my mind. But I haven't told Spencer yet.

"Yes, I propose. And Spencer said yes. So please.. Could you please leave us now?"

"_Spencer how do you feel with all this? Ashley proposed and being stubbed?"_

"How would you feel if the one you loved was to die?"

"_Well.. I wouldn't like it"_

"Then that is your answer. Excuse us now but we have to leave. Ashley needs rest."

"_One last question girls. Ashley? What about your new tour?"_

My new tour.. Yes.. I kind of forgot to tell Spencer about this. My bad??

"Ehm.. I don't know right now. You will find out. I'm sure about that"

Spencer took my hand and we walked to the parking so we could take her car. My car obviously wasn't the best way to move. And I knew she was.. how I can describe it? Silent? Hurt? Mad? When we got inside her car I didn't say anything. I just held her hand with mine. It always feels safe doing this. And she let me.

"Spence?"

"Hmm?"

"Are you ok?"

"Are you?"

"Eh.. yes.. I'm good. Spence.."

"Ash why you didn't tell me about the new tour?"

"Well.. it escaped my mind. The only thing I was thinking was how to propose you"

"Ash.."

"It is true. I would tell you but I didn't know.."

"You didn't know what Ash? I thought we were together in this. Did you afraid that I wouldn't let you? I would never hold you back from your career"

"That's the thing Spence.. I didn't tell you because I didn't know if I would go."

"What?"

"It's a long story. Can we go back to your house please? I promise I will tell you"

We didn't say anything else. We were there together holding hands. You can say anything with just a touch. And her touch was telling me she loved me. And I was telling her exactly the same.

When we got inside I was hugged by a three year old Christine. I missed her so much. My little girl. I missed this house. I missed Spencer. I missed my family..

"Baby girl, watch out because momma still hurts"

"It's ok Spence. It doesn't matter."

"Ash.. please. Don't try to pick her up. You still can't"

"I'm ok."

"Ash.. for once in your life do what they say to you"

"Ok. Ok. Honey bear.. what about I give you a kiss and you give me one back?"

"momma.. you back"

"Yes, baby. I missed my girl so much"

"miss you too momma. Not leave again"

"No. Never. And miss my blue eyed girl?"

We sat down the living room. Spencer told me that I should go up and rest a little while till she made dinner. I refused at first but when she gave me the look I knew that the best was to get up. She can be very protective. Well, I would do the same. Don't blame her..

I slept for an hour or so when I was awaked by kisses. And I mean kisses. No kiss. I will always know what Spencer kisses feels like. Even if I was blinded..

"Mmmm… nice"

"Welcome back sleeping beauty"

"hey.. you said I needed to rest"

"And you should Ash.."

"Well.. it's dinner time?"

"In ten minutes"

"Well well. What we can do in ten minutes?"

"Nothing dirty. So forget it"

"Once a spasm always a spasm.."

"hey.. be glad that I don't hit you because you are hurt."

"Awww.. thanks my wound.."

"Ash.. I'm so glad that you are not dead. You scared me really bad"

"I know baby. And I am sorry. But I am here. And the best part is that I am marrying you"

"Yes.. And I am marrying you.. But Ash.. what about the tour? Do you think you are ready? I mean in your position I don't know if it's the best.." I stopped her before she continued. I had to tell her now my decision..

"Baby.. I need to tell you something.. I won't go on this tour or any other tour"

"What?" she looked at me kind of surprised.

"I decided to quit."

"Ash.. what are you saying?"

"I quit. I just will never go out there and sing anymore"

"Ash.. it's your career. It's your life.. If you are doing this for us it's ok. You don't have to.."

"Spence.. I want to. I stopped liking this thing a long time ago. I won't quit the music business though. I think of opening my label and be a boss to myself. I have a lot of money to take care of us till Christine graduate from college"

"I don't know what to say Ash.."

"Don't say anything. Being famous did one good thing to me. Do you know what that is?"

"What?"

"I met you. And you made my life complete. And I don't need anything because I have everything with you"

"Aww… Ash.. you are everything to me and I love you so much"

"Same here blondie. You and Christine are my girls."

"Mommy, momma.. you here?"

"Inside baby"

Christine hopped in our bed and we stayed there together. My girls and I. My family. I would give everything just to look at their faces every day.

After we came down for dinner we stayed with Christine for a while when it was time for her to go to her bed. She wanted to stay up with her mommies though. I swear, although she is not mine I see myself in her every day. Even Spencer noticed that. I will do my best for her and our future kids. Because, I want to have a little brother or sister for Christine.

"It was a big day"

"Oh.. yes it was"

"Are you feeling ok? Tired? What about your wound?"

"I'm fine Spence. Don't worry."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm fine. Do you know what I need?"

"Whatever it is Ash.. Tell me and I'll get it for you"

"Well.. what I need is to touch you. To feel you. To be with you"

"Ash.. I want you too baby.. but what about.."

"Don't say my wound again because now we are not at the hospital and you can't get away from me"

"Ash.. what if I hurt you?"

"You won't hurt me" and I moved so I could kiss her. She didn't put resistance. I knew she wanted me as much as I wanted her.

My moves were really slow and I will never admit that time to time I was hurting. But it would hurt more if I didn't make love to her. I needed her more..

I was on top of her, my legs on each side of her. I let my hands explore her body; touching her inside her shirt and I could feel her beneath me struggling not to touch me the way I was touching her. I took off her shirt tossing it aside. I wanted to mesmerize her. To remember what she looked like. I let my kisses behind her ear whispering that I wanted her..

In a moment I had her naked in front of me. Naked. Waiting for me to touch her to her more wanted places. And how much I wanted to touch her.. I felt her hands touching me and I knew she wanted me naked as well. Without thinking anymore I let my body to her powers. She took off my blouse and unclasped my bra. She kissed my harden nipples while sucking them. How I missed her.. How I missed her touches.

She turned me so now she was on top of me. She got down one me slowly leaving her wet kisses over my body. She stopped when she saw the stitches and the wound. I didn't know what she would do but all she did was to kiss that place. It felt different than anywhere she kissed. It was more tender.. It just felt different..

The whole scene was sensual, erotic. It was like it was our first time. I sensed her between my legs. To the place I wanted her the most. She kissed between my thighs and I felt her inside me. Her tongue was circling my clit and .. and.. oh my God.. what she could do with her tongue..

"You are so wet baby"

"Oh, Spence.."

I never felt her fingers inside me. And I didn't care. I just wanted to feel her. I wanted for her to touch me. And I always could come only by her tongue. And I knew that the only way why she did this was because she was afraid of hurting me..

"Oh, baby you feel so good"

"Spence.. i.. i.. oh, my God.. there.. Ohhh.. Spence.. yes.."

"Mmm.. you taste just amazing baby"

"Mmmm… Spence.. that was.. I.. can't describe it.."

"I know what you mean. I missed you"

"Now it is my time to show you how I missed you"

"Baby.. please.. I don't want you broken.."

"I'm ok. Don't worry"

I didn't say anything else. I just let my body to take control. I turned us over so I could see her face to face. I just wanted to see her. I licked her and sucked her breast while I was touching her other. Every time, looking at her. She had her eyes closed and I could see her biting her lip not to scream. I was kissing her when my hand touched her where she was already wet.

"baby.. you are wet for me"

"I'm always wet for you Ash.. Always"

I touched her and I could come again from all this erotic sensation we were having. I slid one finger inside her thrusting her in and out so slow.. She moaned and whispered my name. I put another finger inside her and I could feel her tightness over my fingers. I licked her clit while I was inside her thrusting her with two of my fingers. She tried to keep steady her rhythm so we could be synchronized. I knew she was ready.. I knew.. and I was waiting for her..

"Ash.. baby.. AAASSSHH… ohhh my God"

I shushed her with kisses because I didn't want for Christine to wake up. I am still afraid if sometime wakes up and find us in a not so, how to say, good situation..

"Oh, my God.. Ash.. that was amazing"

"Oh, yes it was. Don't get me wrong.. We have amazing sex every time but this time was different.. More sensual, erotic.."

"I know.. Maybe we shouldn't get sex for another four weeks"

"Ah.. no no no my sweet.. No.."

"You just said that it was amazing. Maybe it was the longing.."

"Maybe, maybe not. You know I am a sex addict with you.. So.. I don't think I can take a day without touching you. I believe that four weeks was enough and you need to cover up the sex blank"

"Sex blank? How on earth you find that phrases?"

"Hmm.. don't know? So are you ready for round two?"

"Ash.. you are still recovering. I don't think that we should.."

She didn't finish. I was already kissing her. And don't tell her that I was hurting really bad…

* * *

**TBC**

**I hoped you liked it. I tried for this chapter to be long as the others.. Till the next chapter, which will be tomorrow.. Thank you guys again for all the wonderful reviews. It really makes me to want to try harder every time..**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**xx**


	23. Chapter 23

**Well hello.. Again.. I hope you are not bored with me. Seeing me every day.. I'm just kidding! So.. I dedicate this chapter to mutt009 because she gave me this idea. Enjoy the new chapter.**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 23**

**Spencer's POV**

I woke up this morning with Ashley beside me. I missed her. Waking up with me. I was so afraid that I would lose her. But she was back to me. It was 7am when I woke up feeling wet. And not that kind of wet. Like water was splashed to our bed. I turned immediately to look for Ashley. She was still sleeping with her back facing me. From the outside everything looked fine but when I looked under the covers I saw everything that I didn't want to. There was blood covering Ashley's side. I panicked.

"Ash.." she didn't open her eyes as she always did. She didn't even turn her back.

"Ash.. baby.. wake up" nothing. I tried to move her so I could look at her. She was pale and she didn't move.. I was afraid for the worst. I rushed downstairs so to call the emergency. When I came back I saw that her wound was open and that she had her stitches broken. I tried to stop the bleeding but I couldn't and I didn't know for how long she was like this. I only hoped for the ambulance to come really fast.

"Fuck Ashley. Fuck" I was in panic mode. I had Ashley laying there motionless and Christine in the next room sleeping. I didn't have time to call Glen to come here. So I woke up Christine so I could take her with me.

I had Christine in my arms sleeping when the door knocked and I knew that it was the ambulance. They went upstairs to take Ashley. When they got down I asked them what was happening. They had her in oxygen..

"What is happening?"

"Ms, her pulse is very slow. She lost too much blood."

"We are coming with you"

"Ms only family can.."

"She is my fiancée and my girl here is our daughter."

"Ok"

We got in and got to the hospital again. I couldn't drive in that condition. And I had Christine with me. I can't believe that was happening again. Inside I knew she was hurting but she assured me she was ok. I had to know better.. I shouldn't, we shouldn't make love last night. That is why she is in that state. I looked at her and all I think is how stupid we were. I only hope she will be fine because I can't take another heart ache. If she.. No.. I don't have to think like that..

When we arrived at the hospital the doctors rushed out so they could take her.

"_What we have?"__ the doctor said_

"_Female. Age 26. Found bleeding. She has an open wound. Her pulse is slow"_

"_Take her to the ER"_

"Spencer?" someone was calling my name but I had my eyes on Ashley. It's been only one day that we left the hospital.

"Spencer? What are you doing here so early? I thought you took two days off"

"Ehm.. John. Hey" I couldn't speak. I didn't want to. I just wanted to be with Ashley. I had Christine in my arms. She was sleeping..

"Spencer? What are you doing here?"

"Ashley" and I burst into tears. I couldn't take it anymore. I was trying really hard all this time. With all that was happening. And Ashley again being here I just couldn't anymore..

"What about Ashley Spencer"

"Oh, John. She was bleeding. She lost so much blood that I had to bring her here immediately. Her wound is open again. And her pulse. I don't know what is going on inside. I have Christine with me and I can't get inside. Could you please go find her? See if she is ok?"

"Of course Spencer. Wait here and when I find out I'll come and find you. Don't worry. She is a tough girl."

"That's why we are here John. Because she is stubborn and tough."

"Don't worry. I'm sure she will be fine. Ok? Stay here."

John left me so he could see what was going on with Ashley. I sat down with Christine in my arms. She was still sleeping and I was so sorry for taking her with me but I couldn't wait for Glen to come home..

After 20 minutes John came out and I knew it was bad. I was a doctor and I knew that face.

"Spencer.. she lost so much blood. She crushed again. We did blood transfusion but she still needs blood. Could you please come so we could have a blood test to see if you are compatible?"

"Of course John. Anything. Could someone look after Christine?"

"I'll ask a nurse to come and watch her. Ok?"

"Yeah."

Oh, my God. She needed so much blood? Oh, my God Ashley..

I didn't realize I was crying when I saw John giving me his handkerchief .

"Spencer.. it's ok"

"John you are talking with me and not some patient. I know when something is bad"

"Spencer.. I didn't say it was all good. Of course it isn't. What happened and her wound was open?"

"I don't know if you really want to know.."

"Spence.. you are talking with me."

"Well.. last night.. we were doing things to each other.."

"You had sex?"

"I prefer love. But she was pushing herself all this week and last night she did the same. She didn't say she was hurting but I had to know better. I could stop her but I didn't because I needed her as much she needed me"

"It's ok Spencer. It's no one's fault. Yes, Ashley, as far as I came to know her is a very stubborn person. But I am sure she didn't want to worry you"

"Well.. look at us now. I'm not worrying at all" while we were having this conversation the nurse was talking my blood. I felt dizzy but it was ok. I could give my life for Ashley if I had to.

"We are ready. Take this to the ER for Ms Davies. Really fast"

"Yes, doctor"

We left the blood test room and I was outside again waiting for the doctors to tell me about Ashley.

After an hour and something a doctor came out with blood in his medical apron.

"Ms Carlin?"

"Yes, doctor."

"We stopped the blood and we stitched her again. She lost enough blood but we did her blood transfusion. Now she is stable and resting inside her room. She will wake up after some hours. You could go and see her if you want."

"Doctor, is she fine? Like really fine? What about her wound? What if it opens again?"

"Well.. I think that it would be better if she didn't do anything for a month. Not lift heavy things, do domestic works, drive. Anything that could make her stitches open again."

"Thank you again doctor."

"Don't worry. She will be fine"

I don't know how she will react when I tell her that she can't do anything at all. I think that she could take well all the things but sex. I don't think she will like it..

I took Christine by her hand and walked to Ashley's room. She was sleeping and she was the most beautiful girl I ever seen. The color was coming to her cheeks. I was so worried.. That girl will be the death in me.

"Mommy? Is momma ok?"

"She will be baby girl. Now she is resting. She will wake up in a few"

"Can I wake her?"

"I think that we should let momma sleep a little while"

"I not speak to her mommy. I kiss her"

"Ok, you can kiss her. But not wake her up. Ok?"

"Ok, mommy"

I picked her up so she could reach Ashley and kiss her. She touched her cheek and said _'I love you momma' _before she nod me to get her down.

"Mmmm.. what a kiss."

"Ashh…"

"The story is true.."

"Ash.. are you ok? What are you saying? Oh, my God. I am going to call the doctor"

"I'm fine Spence. I just think of myself as the sleeping beauty after the kiss."

"What?"

"Where is my princess?"

"Here momma"

"Give me that kiss again?"

"Yes momma. Mommy kiss momma?"

"How I can resist this?"

I kissed Ashley on her lips. They were dry but I didn't care. I only cared that she was able to talk to me again.

"Ash, you have to stop doing this"

"Doing what?"

"Dying on me. So, please stop"

"Spence.. I am not dead.."

"Ash.. I'll say this once. Once. You will do what the doctors say and what I'll say. You hear me? No more stubbornness"

"But Spence.."

"No buts.. You'll come to my house. You won't do anything. And I mean anything"

"But.."

"No buts.. And forget the s-e-x because it is not gonna happen"

"What?"

"You heard me. Doctor said that you have to rest for a month not doing anything"

"Oh, come on Spence. What am I going to do?"

"Nothing. You will sleep, you will eat and you will watch tv."

"…"

"Don't put that face on me. Ashley, what we did last night.. You were hurting and you continued. And I let you doing this. I had to stop it knowing in what condition you were."

"But Spencer.. I was ok"

"No you weren't. And do you know how I felt when I saw you this morning? Do you know that I thought you would die? Again?"

"I'm sorry baby"

"I know you do. So for now you'll have to do what the doctors say."

"So.. nothing for a month eh?"

"Yeap."

"That will be something new."

"And I'll be glad to be there and help you"

"I hope you'll be patient with me baby. So give momma a kiss?"

We both kissed her. It was so good to have her back with us again. And I hope for this time to be obedient like a good girl..

* * *

**TBC**

**Hope you have a great Saturday!! As for me.. a cold won't close me inside the house.. I'm going out!! See you tomorrow with a new chapter..**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**xx**


	24. Chapter 24

**Well.. what can I say?? I did go out last night, and I had a gr8 night but I came back without a voice!! Yes, my throat gave up on me! You are very lucky that you read me and not hear me! Anyway! Here is another update!**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 24**

I have one thing to say. Fuck. Yes. One word that says everything. But it is my fault. If I wasn't so stubborn sometimes.. Now I have to sit and do nothing for a month. A month. Can you believe this? Well.. I don't. Those doctors. But I am fine. I can walk. But noooo… No.. I have to do nothing. And Spencer is so bossy in that matter. She doesn't let me to do anything. I do believe that I'll go crazy..

"Could you please turn off your brain?"

"What?"

"You heard me Ash.. I can hear you"

"No you don't"

"I do and I hear what you are thinking. Forget it. That's what you get if you playing with fire."

"Spencer.."

"Don't Spencer me"

"But Spencer, baby, what am I going to do? I am not used to this. You will be at the hospital, Christine at the daycare, Aiden and Kyla have their lives. What am I going to do?"

"Well.. I took vacations"

"WHAT?"

"I haven't have my work permit for two years so I took it so I can be with you and take care of you"

"You shouldn't Spence"

"I couldn't leave you alone silly. And I am definitely sure that if you were alone you would do what your mind tells you and that would be to get up, walk, drive and I don't know what else. So, I'll be with you 24-7 to watch you"

"Fuck"

"What? I thought you would like it"

"Fuck, because I'll have you a whole month and I can't make love to you. Stupid stupid doctors."

"Stupid Ashley"

"Don't blame me baby. It is you to blame"

"And why is that Ms Davies?"

"Because you are incredible, amazing, hot, sexy and I love your body. And I couldn't stay away from you"

"Ok, sweet talker. Now, come on. It is time for bath"

"Oh, will you rub my back?"

"Yes.."

"And will you wash my hair?"

"yeess.."

"And will you.."

"No.. Now get up missy."

"I love it when you are bossy"

"Come on.."

Do you know what it is when you are naked, with your girlfriend-fiancée in the bathroom and you can't have sex? Do you? I am not wishing this not even in my worst enemy. Spencer is amazing though. You do realize when someone really loves you not when they tell you but from the small gestures. And she's been here with me. Taking care of me. Simply loving me. And I think I love her more. I'll try to be a good girl. I said I'll try..

"Spence?"

"What is it baby?"

"Thank you"

"For what?"

"Being here with me. Staying close. Not leaving me. Caring for me"

"Ash.. you don't have to thank me baby. I do love you and I could never leave you. You marked my heart and now it is all yours"

"I'm sorry for scaring you. Both times."

"You did Ash. You really did. I thought I would lose you and I don't want to feel that again."

"I promise I won't do anything else to scare you. Cross my heart. May I have a kiss or I can't even kiss you?"

"If you won't kiss me then I will."

I kissed her and she kissed me back. A small gesture but with so love. We laid in our bed. We laid there seeing each other. Holding each other. Spencer's hand was on my wound. It felt strange there when I touched it but Spencer's touch is different. Like she can take away the pain. This wound will remind me so many things. And I believe Spencer feels the same..

**

"Ash.."

"Assshh.."

"ASHLEY"

"Whaaatt? Is it morning yet? Five more minutes and I promise I'll get up"

"Ash.. I was trying to wake you for five minutes. I was afraid that you fainted or something. I was ready to call the ambulance again.." she looked terrified. I believe that I made her be afraid for her shadow as well..

"I'm ok Spence. I'm fine. I guess that now it is even harder for me to wake up. Are you ok now?"

"Yes, but.. Ash.. in the night I wake up every five minutes to see if you are breathing."

"Spence.. I'm ok. Please stop worrying so much. Doctors said that I am fine. They said that I need to rest and I will be fine. I'm sorry for putting you in this situation.."

"I'm sorry baby. I just.. I can't explain why I am so worried"

"Because you love me? Because I am that good?"

"Because you are not so full of yourself?"

"Maybe.."

"I'm going to wake up Christine. Wait here and I'll be up to bring you breakfast."

"But I want to tell her to have a nice day at school Spence and I want to sit with both of you and have breakfast.."

"Not yet. Maybe tomorrow or the day after tomorrow. When she finish her breakfast I'll sent her up so you can say that to her.."

"Ooookkkk… but know that I don't like it.."

"I know.. but you'll have to get used to it"

"Yeah, yeah.. whatever"

"Be nice.. Now give me my goodmorning kiss.."

After half an hour later I had a very happy Christine in my arms. How I love that kid. I feel that she is mine and Spencer's. She is a daughter to me and I would give her everything just to see her smile. They say that people change and I definitely had a turn of 360 segments.

I never used to people taken care of me. No. My mother never cared for me. My father was absent. And I learned to take care of myself. But Spencer taken care of me was something new and I liked it. Even though I would rather walk and do things for myself.

"Ash.. you are thinking again. You'll burn your brain baby"

"I was thinking of you so I would burn it every time"

"Yeah? What were you thinking?"

"That I love you"

"And I love you"

"Now.. what you made me for breakfast?"

"Doctors said that you can eat only mashed food because of the surgery.."

"WHAT?"

"For like three days."

"Again.. WHAT?"

"Come on.. It's not a big deal"

"Ok.. That's enough. I had enough. I can't walk as I want to, I can't drive, I can't pick up my daughter and hug her, I can't have sex and now I can't eat? I HAD ENOUGH"

"Did you finish?"

"Yes. Sorry. I had to let it go"

"Did you let it go?"

"I suppose."

"Now.. you can eat."

"I don't want to Spence.. It's bliax"

"You are like a big baby Ash"

"I don't want to Spence.. Please.. don't make me eat that thing.. please please. Pretty please.."

"I think that I have two kids inside this house. But Christine is more mature"

"Pleeeeeaaaaasssseeeee…."

"Ash.. you need to eat. You haven't eaten anything from yesterday. Sorry baby."

"Ahh…fuuuucccckkkk…"

"Open your mouth as a big girl you are.."

Did I eat that thing? Yes. Did I like it? No. Why?? If I knew that I had sex and my wound would be open I swear to you that I wouldn't do it. Really.. My life now would be easier. Three days isn't that long. Is it? I'm a grown up woman. I am tough. Yes. I can.. Noooo I can't.. I don't want to eat mashed food. It's gross. And I am not a baby..

* * *

**TBC**

**Sorry that it's not big but tomorrow's chapter will be. Thank you for reading and reviewing. It means a lot to me.. Hope you liked this chapter.. Bye guys.. For now..**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**xx**


	25. Chapter 25

**Monday.. I hate Mondays! I want to share something with you!! I love music and I made a playlist of mine and sent it to the most famous radio station of my town and they chose me. Yes.. For two hours they played my music! I was incredibly happy!!! Just wanted to share this with you!! Enjoy the new chapter..**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 25**

**Spencer's POV**

These past three weeks was hell in heaven. Ash is not used to this. So to say that it was easy for me to hold her down and not do anything was very difficult. I swear to you I think that my daughter of three years old is more mature. At least she listens when I tell her something. Ashley from the other hand.. it's something else.

She didn't like the food; she wanted to help me with everything in the house, not to say that she wanted to have sex. She even proposed me that I wouldn't do anything. I would just lay down and she would only touch me. You know where. Like I don't know her.

But one month was coming to its end and I felt so much relief. Don't misunderstand me. I love taken care of her but for once I just want her to listen to me. To say for one time 'yes, Spencer. You have right. I'll do what you say'. I don't want her to be obedient or anything. I just want her to understand the situation. I care for her so deeply..

I was just sitting alone in the living room deep in thoughts when I heard footsteps behind me. I knew it was Ashley. I always know when she is near. It's just a feeling I have with her.

"Spence?"

"Hmmm..?"

"What are you doing here alone?"

"Just thinking"

"Thinking eh? That's a good thing or a bad thing?"

"Depends how you look at that"

"Baby? Can I sit here with you?"

"You don't have to ask Ash"

She sat next to me and cuddled with me. She was getting better. More stronger. She could do things for herself and I couldn't tell her not to do anything. She kissed my arm and warped her hands round my waist..

"Spence.. I love you so much."

"I know you do Ash.." I tried to continue but she stopped me with her fingers..

"No, please I want to say something."

"Ok"

"Spence, I'm stubborn, I don't have patience, I love doing things on my own and I never had someone to be here with me. I know I made your life difficult all these days and I am sorry. I am so sorry baby. I didn't want to. But you are an amazing person, an amazing girlfriend who soon will be my wife. I am sorry for being a child sometimes. I promise to you that I'll try to be less of these things in the future. Because I want us to work. I want us to have a family and be a grown up. Not a child. I just wanted you to know that."

"Ash.. you are perfect in every single way. You are it for me and you know it. It is nice to know that you know you were stubborn. Believe me that all I want is for you to be ok. All I did was to keep you from being hurt again."

"I know Spence. I'm sorry. Will you forgive me?"

"There is nothing to forgive. If you weren't the way you are then I wouldn't love you so much. Because I love you no matter what. With advantages and disadvantages."

"You are the best girlfriend in the whole world"

"Whole world eh?"

"Yeap. And you are mine"

"I'm yours baby."

I kissed her in her lips and I took her in my arms. She lost some weight from all this but nevertheless she was beautiful as always. We separated from each other when we heard a knock on the door..

"You wait for someone?"

"No. Everyone is at job. What if it's about Christine?"

"Then open the door Spence"

When I did I came face to face with a police officer. My face drop in the ground because immediately my mind went to the recent events. We were waiting to hear what happened with Paulie. When Ashley gave her statement to the police about what happened, the police went to Paulie's house to look for her. She wasn't there. There was blood but not Paulie. She must have found her senses and left. All these long I was afraid. I didn't want to pass my fears to Ashley and I didn't tell her about what police found. She was still in hospital and then with the new crisis I couldn't tell her either. All these long I kept it inside me. If I told her then she would go outside and look for her. And if she did that then I would lose her. She was still weak.

"Spence who is it?"

"Ehm.. the police" Ashley came from behind me and opened the door wider.

"Hi, there officer. What we can do about you?"

"Sorry for coming here this early but I would like to speak to both of you. I assume you are Ms Davies"

"Yes, I am. What's wrong officer?"

"Can I come in?"

"Of course. Come in" Ashley looked at me and I knew she was asking me with her eyes what was wrong. Sooner or later she would find out..

"Ms Davies it's about your statement to the police station few weeks ago about Ms Paulie Hatchson."

"I thought the case closed. She was found dead." Ashley looked at me again like she didn't know what was happening. And she didn't.

"No. You must be wrong. Paulie Hatchon is not dead. After your statement we went to her house to find her but she was nowhere to be found. We found her blood and your blood all over the kitchen and we searched the house for more evidents"

"Spence? What is he saying?"

"Ash.. I.."

"I thought you knew. We talked with Ms Carlin and informed her for everything the next day"

"No, I didn't know anything." I tried to touch her hand but she pulled it from me. I knew she was angry with all this. I kept a secret from her and now she is angry. But I wanted to protect her.

"Well the reason I came here today. We think we found her and that lady match the description you gave us. We would like both of you to come to the station to see if she is the same girl."

"Thank you officer. When we could come?"

"You could come with me or you can come by yourselves through the day"

"Officer, thank you but we would like to come by ourselves. You see our daughter comes from daycare at noon and we would like to be here when she arrives."

"I understand. Here is my card. Have a nice day ladies"

"Thank you officer"

All this time we were here the three of us I never spoke. I couldn't really. What could I say? Ashley never looked at me once and every time I tried to reach her she was going away from me.

"Ash..?" she had her back on me. She didn't turn back to see me or talk to me.

"Ash.. please look at me."

She turned her face and I saw tears on her face. I wanted to reach her and kiss every tear on her face but when I took a step forward she did a step backward.

"Ash.. please. Talk to me"

"Talk to you? Spencer.. This fucking crazy bitch was still alive and you didn't tell me anything. So why talk to you?"

"Ash.. please baby.. don't be like this."

"Being what Spencer? Tell me how you want me to be"

"Don't be like this. I didn't tell you because you were still recovering. What good that would make?"

"Fuck me with the fucking recovery. Just Fuck me. My recovery this, my revovery that. My revovery, my ass. You could just tell me" she was extremely angry. I never saw her like that again. And she had every reason to be like this. I understood from where she was coming.

"Could you please relax?"

"RELAX? Are you fucking kidding me? Please.. Tell me that you are because I can't explain it"

I tried to step closer to her but she was still going away from me.

"Don't come near me Spencer" it was the third time she called me by my full name and now I missed her calling me Spence.

"Ash, please understand.."

"Understand?" she was laughing now but it was a hysteric laugh. She was crying and laughing at the same time. "Understand what? That you lied to me? That the crazy ex-girlfriend of yours was still out there so long? Why you didn't tell me? Ha? What? Did you afraid that maybe I would kill her and you would be sad? That you would lose your first love?"

Now she was out of herself. She said what? Did she say what I think she said? I was afraid for Paulie because I didn't want to lose her? No, I must have heard wrong.

"What did you just say? Because I think that I heard that you said that I didn't want you to kill Paulie because I would lose her"

"That's exactly what I said. You heard me. You were afraid that I would kill her or I would put someone else to do the dirty job and that's you never told me"

"Are you lost your fucking mind?" I was furious. How she dare think like that? Paulie was nothing to me and she took my daughter. How she could say those things to me. I knew she was hurting but saying these things..

"You must be because you don't think before you speak. Can you hear what you just said? Can you? If you lost your memory let me refresh you. First Paulie took my daughter so she can have me back and second she stubbed you to death. How on earth I would want something like that not to be dead? Because I did. And if I could I would kill her with my own hands. But I am not such a person." She looked at me and I saw her eyes fell on the floor. I suppose she wasn't the only angry one here. And she never saw me before yell at her.

"I never told you because you were still in hospital and then you were back at hospital again. You did surgery twice. Twice and you crushed many times. Do you want to know why I never told you? Because you are A FUCKING STUBBORN. That's why I never told you. If I tell you not to get up you do the opposite. If I told you she was alive you would go out there look for her and kill her."

"You bet your ass I would. Whenever I have to choose between myself and you and Christine I will always choose both of you. Because I want to protect you. I want you to be safe."

"And who would protect you Ashley? Tell me. Because I do the exact same thing to you and you accuse me of things." She didn't answer me back so I just continued.

"You can't always protect us. I'm glad you want to. But we can protect ourselves you know and I have enough strength to protect you as well. You told me that if you had to choose, you would choose us. And that is what I am telling you. I would do the same. You and Christine are my life. And I would anything to protect you. Even if I had to not tell you things that might upset you"

We yelled to each other. It was the first time we had a fight like this and I didn't like it at all. I didn't like to fight with Ashley. It made me sad. But I think that we had to tell this things to each other. And I know she understands because now she look more relaxed and she looks at me again with those beautiful eyes of her.

"I'm sorry"

"You seem to ask sorry so many times Ashley"

"I mean it Spence. I'm sorry. I don't know what else to say"

"I want you to tell me that you won't get into conclusions before you hear me out. Because that's what you always do Ash."

"I know. I know. I'm trying. Please."

"I know that you are trying and I try to be understanding but don't make the most of my love Ash."

"I don't."

"Yes, you are. I love you and you know it. When you are like this I think that you use my love for your advantage"

"Spe-nce.. I.. don't.. I would never.."

"I hope you don't. I love you. I truly do. And I want to be with you but if you keep like this I don't know if it's the best for us to get married"

"Spence.."

I know I was hard on her. But sometimes I feel like this. I know she had a hard life and she never cared for anyone. I know that she loves me and Christine. I can see it in her eyes. But if I have to shake her so she can understand then I'll do it. I would never leave her. I just want for her to think some things. If we are to get marry I want to know that she can be in a serious long term relationship. We are not alone. We have Christine and when one of us hurting we hurt Christine back. And I don't want to do that to my child. To our child. Because Christine has two mothers.

* * *

**TBC**

**This chapter is longer than the last one. Love problems.. I guess Ashley has to stop doing what she is doing. But we love her. Don't we? Hope you liked this chapter..**

**Reviews are always welcome…**

**xx**


	26. Chapter 26

**Hey guys.. How we are doing today?? It's Tuesday and on Thursday I don't have to go to work because it's a national day for us.. I'm already happy!! As for this chapter I feel kind of a drama queen and it will be drama.. So.. hope you like it..**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 26**

"_When you are like this I think that you use my love for your advantage"_

_"I hope you don't. I love you. I truly do. And I want to be with you but if you keep like this I don't know if it's the best for us to get married"_

What Spencer said still running through my mind. Do I really take advantage of her love? Could I? But.. She said that we shouldn't get married. Does she not want me as I want her? I know I was harsh on her. I said things without thinking. That's why the say that teeth hold the tongue. I always was irrational, running into conclusion for everyone. But why I did this with Spencer? Did I push her so much? Maybe I did because I never saw her so hurt before. Maybe she was right after all. I do take advantage of her love. And I need to stop doing this. If I want a future with her I have to stop being like this and especially with Spencer.

Except from what Spencer said for us I can't take my mind off Paulie and what the officer told us. That bitch was still alive. I knew I had to make sure that she was dead before but I had to get out of that house. And now we have to go to the station to see if it is her. After all what happened I am still feeling strange. Spencer and I never fight and if we did was for little things and then we made up. But this time she said things that I can't forget and I don't know if I want to. Because everything she said was right. And if I hurt her I need to stop doing this..

We waited for Christine to come home and then we could go back to the station. I wasn't sure if I wanted to come face to face with that woman. She was a fucking crazy bitch and she wanted my Spencer back. I just wasn't sure what I would face. What if it wasn't her? What if she was still out there spying on us, planning her new plan? Questions that I don't know if I have answers for. And if I had I don't know if I would want to.

"Ashley? Are you ready?" Ashley.. She never called me Ashley. Only when she was mad at me for something but after an hour she would call me again Ash, or baby. Well an hour was five hours later and she still called me Ashley..

"Yeah, I'm ready. What time Glen should be here?"

"He told me he should be here in 10 minutes. When he'll come we go."

"Ok."

That was it. Typical. We never were typical. We were always Spashley, as everyone called us. From what I see, this time I pushed Spencer and she keeps her distance from me. Do I like it? No. Did I do this to us? Yes. Nice.. Very nice Ashley..

Glen was right at time. When I opened the door for him to get in he saw my face and looked at me. I could see in his eyes that he was asking me 'what is going on?'. But what I could say to him. That I am so fucked up of person? That I keep hurting his sister with my insecurities? So I just looked at him and mouthed an 'it's ok' and told him to get in.

"Hey, Glen. Sorry from calling you the last minute but we have to go to the police station. They think they found Paulie" Spencer said and Glen looked at me again.

"Oh, that bitch. I hope they lock her for good. Crazy bitch"

"Yeah, so Spence? Are you ready?"

"Yes, lets go."

Before I follow her outside to her car Glen stopped me wrapping my arm.

"Ashley? What is going on?"

"Nothing is going on Glen"

"Come on. I know you two. And this room smells like tension"

"Nothing. Leave it Glen"

"I can't leave it Ashley. Now tell me"

"Spencer is waiting. Ask your sister"

I didn't want to tell Glen while Spencer was outside waiting. But this guy knew. Glen was at our house many times so he came used to us. He knew us very well and I couldn't hide anything from him.

"What did Glen want?"

"Nothing"

"Ok" that's what I mean. In other case Spencer would ask me what Glen wanted and she wouldn't answer with just an 'ok'. I guess pay back is a bitch?..

We arrived at the police station after half an hour. Silence was what we had all the way there. I didn't push her to talk. What I could say? She was right every time.

"Hello, we are looking for Detective Lewis."

"Does he expect you?"

"Yes, we are Spencer Carlin and Ashley Davies. We came to recognise someone."

"Wait here Ms."

We waited till Detective Lewis came for us. I was feeling nervous. I didn't know if I was ready to see if it was her. What if she wasn't? All I needed right now was Spencer to hold me. To hold my hand and tell me that everything is going to be ok. And she did. She held my hand although we were in no real speaking terms.

"Are you ready Ms Davies?"

"yes, detective."

We held hands and we got inside the room were they had the suspects. When they turned on the lights I knew it. She was there. Number 3. Paulie Hatchson. I saw her looking right through me but I knew she couldn't see us. After all it was a mirror separating us.

"Ms Davies? Is Paulie Hatchson one of the women in there?"

"Yes. Number 3."

"Thank you Ms Davies. If we need you for something else we may contact you"

"Ok"

"She will be charged for kidnapping, attack with purpose of death and assault. I guess she will be locked for years"

"Thank you Detective. For everything."

"How you feel seeing her after all these years?" I saw Spencer looked at me surprised. I couldn't hold that question inside and I was sorry because the moment I asked her that I was already regretted it.

"What kind of a question is this Ashley?"

"Well.."

"Well what?"

"You saw her after all these years. How you felt?"

"How I felt? Do you know how I felt seeing her? Disgusted. Furious. Angry. Do you like the emotions I have about her? Or do you want me to say that she was beautiful, exactly as I remembered her. With a great body and sorry that she is locked up because now I can never have her?"

"Do you?"

"Do I what?"

"Do you feel sorry she is locked up?"

"You will never change Ashley. Never. I guess what I told you about loving you never came to your ears." Why am always so stupid? Why I don't keep my mouth closed? Why?

"I.. I.. don't know what to say Spencer"

"What? You are not saying sorry again? Why not?"

"I'm sorry"

"That is not enough you know. Not any more."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know what I mean. I only know that you hurt me because you don't trust me"

"I trust you. I do."

"We can't have this conversation here. People are watching. We will discuss it when we got home"

I didn't say yes. I didn't say no. I just nodded and followed her back to her car. I guess we need to discuss what is going on with us. What is going with me?

"Hey girls? How did it go? That bitch is locked up?"

"Yes, Glen. It was her. I recognised her."

"That is a good thing. Isn't it?"

"I guess"

"Why you both have these faces. What did happen?"

"Glen, thank you for watching Christine. But I need to talk with Ashley."

"Ok. What is going on?"

"It's something between us if you don't mind" I saw them speaking to each other. If I knew Glen he wouldn't leave unless he knew what was happening. But Spencer wouldn't tell him anything before we had this talk.

"Of course I mind. I love both of you and I care for you. So don't tell me that"

"Glen, stop it. I don't have anything to say."

"Ok. Do you want to take Christine with me so you can talk?"

"Yes, I would like that. Because I don't want her to hear anything that she shouldn't."

"That bad?"

"Glen.."

"Ok.. Christine? Princess?"

"Yes, uncle Glen?"

"What you think of ice-cream?"

"I love it."

"Say bye to your mommies"

"Bye momma, bye mommy"

We both looked at Christine leaving with Glen. Sometimes I wish I was on her age.

"We need to talk Ashley"

"Ashley? All day long you keep calling me by my full name"

"Don't change the subject"

"I don't."

"Why you are like this Ashley? What do you want?"

"I don't know what you are saying"

"Ashley. Are you serious? You keep yelling, you accused me two times of having feelings for some psycho. And you don't seem to understand that I love you."

"I.."

"Don't say sorry again because I'll hit you. Really. Sorry doesn't solve anything you know."

"What you want me to say Spencer? That you are right? You are. Do you want to know why I am like this? Because I learned with the hard way to be like this. I never had anyone to care for me. I never had anyone to care. And being with you changed me. You made me have insecurities. I was never insecure with myself. Now you make me feel that I don't worth your time. You are perfect and I am just me."

"How I made you feel unworthy? Tell me. I always make you feel that you are my world. I care about you deeply and do you know what hurts me the most? That you don't really know it. And I can't find other ways to show you. Because I gave you all of myself."

"I didn't ask you to."

"You didn't ask. I wanted to. Because I found the one I wanted to do that. But obviously from all I can see maybe you are right. You don't worth it."

"Guess you are right."

"Guess I am"

"I'll pick my things and go to my house"

"You should"

Are we really breaking up? Am I ready to do this? Am I ready to live without Spencer in my life? Am I so selfish, so stubborn? Maybe, maybe not…

After I came down I took my time to look at her one last time. I know she hurts because I know her. And because I hurt the same. I guess it is my fault and if I can have her back I have to be the perfect person for her..

"Spence..?"

"Yes?"

"It's not a break up"

"What that is?"

"It's a break. We need to think some things out. And I need to think some things out. I love you. I will always love you. And you are the one for me. I just have to be the right one for you."

"Do whatever you like Ash" she called me Ash. I guess that is a good thing. Isn't it?

"Kiss Christine for me and tell her I love her very much."

"You can come to see her if you want. I know she will miss you"

"I'll miss her too. Thank you anyway. And let me say that one last time. I'm so sorry for everything. And I mean it this time. Bye Spence"

"Bye Ash"

I left her and it was like I left my heart inside. I let my tears fall only when I got inside my car. I held the wheel so hard that my hands hurt. Why I always need to fuck up everything? Why when I have something good I need to destroy it? If it is for us to be together I have to be the right person. Without insecurities.

I took one last look at Spencer's house and I just let myself to say "I Love you Spencer Carlin. So very much".

* * *

**TBC**

**Drama, drama, drama. I told you. I felt like a drama queen today. Don't be afraid my friends.. Ashley will learn her lesson one and for all. Thank you so much for your reviews! I hope you will still be with me. More chapters to come.. Did I tell you?? I love writing this story..**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**xx**


	27. Chapter 27

**This chapter will have both Spencer's and Ashley's POV. And by the way.. You guys rock! This story is my top first in reviewing! You even passed my twilight FF. So a big thank you to all!!! Enjoy the new chapter..**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 27**

**Spenser's POV**

When do you know that something is finish? When do you know that the person you totally love crush you hurt and tossed it? When do you know? I wasn't expected this outcome. I knew Ashley was in bad mood with all these but I never ever expected for her to be like this. What she told me about Paulie was socking. Did she think that I was still in love with her? How could she ever think of that? And not only once but twice?

I know she is lost. I know she is not used to all this. But I love her anyway. I do. I can't stop loving her. She has my heart and I know I have hers. But maybe this break she told me is much needed. Not for me but for her. I don't want to be away from Ashley. But she needs to find herself so she can come back to me. I care for her and she knows that. I'll be here waiting for her.

When she opened the door to leave me, to leave our house, my heart broke. Deep inside I knew she loved me and what she was doing was hurting her as much it was hurting me. I saw her from my window. She didn't leave right away. She stayed there for a few minutes and I could see her watching inside. But she didn't know I was watching her. We both hurt but it is true what they say. 'Love hurts' and I found it the hard way.

Did it hurt when I moved and left Paulie behind? Yes. Did I hurt when I married Bob even if I knew that he wasn't what I wanted? Yes. Did it hurt when Ashley left me? No. It broke my heart.

After an hour thinking of the last events I heard the door open and close. Glen was back with a very happy Christine by his side.

"Mommy"

"Hey, baby. How was your evening?"

"Pefect mommy"

"Did you like your ice-cream?"

"Yeap. I got stawbeyi"

"Hm.. yammi."

"Where is momma?"

"She had to leave baby. She had to go to work." What do I really say to her? She is too young to understand and Ashley is already a big part in her life. And I want for her to stay like this.

"Awww.. do I see momma?"

"Later baby. Now give me a big kiss."

"Aww.. mommy. You silly"

"Only with you baby girl"

Christine did her happy dance all over the place. When she eats sugar she goes like this for hours until she fall down and sleep. Glen was looking at me and I knew he wanted to ask me.

"Ask Glen. Whatever it is"

"What is going on with you and Ashley?"

"We broke up"

"WHAT?"

"Actually we didn't break up. We are just in a break from each other. She needs to figure out her life and I need to figure out mine"

"How you coping with all this?"

"It is difficult. I won't say it's not. But Glen, she didn't trust me. Do you know what she said? That I wanted Paulie. I can't even look at her in her eyes. This woman kidnapped my child and stubbed my girlfriend. I don't know how she could think that I would want to be with that psycho."

"Spence.. I'm sorry. But you know Ashley"

"I thought I knew her. Do you know what the sad thing is?"

"What?"

"That I love her. I love her so much that I hurt inside Glen. I hurt when I don't have her near me. I hurt when I know that I won't have her next to me when I wake up. And I hurt because she thinks that I don't love her enough"

"Spence.. Ashley is crazy for you. You know that. She loves you very much. I won't say that I understand her but you, we, have to understand from where she comes from."

"I know Glen. I know what she did in her life. I know who she is and who she was. But her insecurities.. She is such a strong person. The strongest I know. And now that I think about it, for her to feel insecure drove her crazy."

"I think that is the best for you to be apart for a while. If she wants you Spence, if she loves you the way I know she does, she will come back to you"

"I hope she finds what she is looking for because I found what I was looking for. And it is her. I guess I'll have to wait"

And I mean it. If I have to wait for her I'll do. Step by step we will find our way back to each other.

**Ashley's POV**

When I left Spencer's home I felt blank. Nothing. Like someone took my heart and tossed it somewhere where I couldn't find it. I didn't want to take a break. But I think it was the best. She doesn't deserve me if I am hurting her. She needs someone to be able to stand by her. To be what she deserves. And I am some rock star girl, full of insecurities, and broken. Do I want someone else in Spencer's life? Of course not. I could never see her with someone else except me. So my goal is to find myself and come back to where I left my heart.. Easy? No. Not easy..

I was back at home when my phone rang. I didn't want to pick it up but I knew that if I didn't..

"Yes, Ian?"

"Ashley? Where are you? I've been looking for you all day"

"I guess I didn't hear my phone. I had it on vibration."

"Ashley I know that you are still recovering but you didn't answer me about the tour" the tour.. Yes, I forgot about it. I wanting to call him and tell him that I wouldn't go but every time something would happen and I forgot.

"Yes. Sorry Ian. When this tour is starting and where we are going this time?"

"It's from May to August and it's here in the US. You will play to some states and then we are coming back to record your new album"

"Ian, I want to tell you something. After this tour I quit."

"WHAT? You are not serious. Ashley you are the next big thing. Britney is the pop princess and you are the rock princess. Now is your time. You can't just quit"

"It's not what I want anymore Ian."

"It's about Spencer?" I didn't tell him what was happening between us and he didn't have to know

"It's about me Ian. I lost myself somehow. And I want to find myself again. So that's why I quit"

"You tell me it's about you and not Spencer. Yeah, right"

"It's about both. But mostly because of me. Now, it's my decision and that's final."

"I guess you decided and I can't say a thing. Yeah?"

"I guess."

"You are doing the big mistake of your life. You have a month till May. I hope Spencer's knows"

"Bye Ian"

I closed the phone and I tried to relax to my very comfy couch. I didn't want to talk to anyone else. I just wanted to be alone with my thoughts. Now.. what do I say to Spencer? Do I tell her that I am leaving for four months or not saying anything?

My phone rang again and I wouldn't pick it up if I didn't know who was calling me. It was the ringtone I had for Spencer's house. If she called me from her house maybe something was wrong with Christine and everything. I love my baby girl so much..

"Yes?"

"Momma?"

"Baby girl? What is going wrong? Where is mommy?" I was scared. What if something happened to Spencer?

"She is ok momma. You not hewe"

"Yes baby, sorry. Momma had to be at work"

"That's what mommy say"

"Why you are up this late?"

"You not hewe to say night" my baby girl. Why I was so stupid? I didn't think that Christine would be hurt too with all this.

"Sorry, princess. I promise you I'll come to see you tomorrow and take you for a walk. What do you say?"

"Yaaaayyy. Bye momma. Take mommy" my heart was beating so hard. I know we were apart for hours but I felt like it was months since I talked to her. I already missed her voice.

"Ehm.. hey Ash. Sorry, she wouldn't sleep unless she talked to you"

"It's ok Spence. I missed her."

"She misses you too. What did you say to her and she was so happy?"

"I told her I would take her for a walk tomorrow if you don't mind"

"Of course I don't mind. What time will you come?"

"After she eats?"

"Ok. See you tomorrow then"

"I guess. Goodnight Spence"

"Goodnight Ash"

Do you ever think that you did something stupid? Something you wish you haven't done and take it back? Well this is how I feel. That I did the most stupid think in my life. I did some stupid things but this get over everything I did before.

What I am thinking right now though it's not why I was so stupid but how on earth will tell Spencer that I am leaving although I told her that I wouldn't. How on earth I tell Christine that I won't see her for four months and how on earth I can be away from them both. Just fuck me. Really.

**

The next day has come and I didn't sleep at all. My mind was going from Spencer to Christine and then the tour. But at least it's my last one. As I told Ian, I will quit after that and I'll open my new label. That is a dream I want to come true. Other than marry Spencer of course. Because believe me.. I still want to marry that woman..

I kept looking my watch and those hours didn't seem to pass. Why when you want something you feel that hour is stopped and you don't seem to move forward? Maybe because you want something really bad.

I tried to get out, to write a new song, to clean (that's new). I've tried everything. And finally it was time for me to get my girl. Finally. Now what am I doing? Taking Spencer with me or talk to her later? Guess we'll see when I arrive outside..

And I haven't decided yet. I am outside and I still don't know what to do. But I can't stay longer inside my car. It's already been 10 minutes since I arrived.

"Get yourself and go knock the door Ashley" I tell to myself incase I can hear myself loud..

"Hey"

"Hi" awkward? Maybe..

"Did I come earlier than I should?"

"No. You came right in time. Christine is.." she didn't finish because I have a little blond girl hug my legs and opening her arms for me to pick her up..

"Momma.. you hewe"

"Baby girl. I missed you"

"Miss you too momma"

"How was your day princess?"

"Good. We going?"

"Are you ready?"

"Momma, yes. Not see?"

"I guess you are ready then" I had her down, took her hand in mine and looked at Spencer.

"Spence.. can we talk when we return? I want to tell you something"

"Yeah, ok. Have fun little one"

"Bye mommy"

"Bye baby. Be nice for momma" I heard Spencer yell while we were going to my car. I gave her one last look before I get in.

I took Christine at the park so she could play and we went to her favorite place so she can have her ice-cream. My girl loves ice-cream very much. When I thought it was the best for Christine to leave I took her and we came back. Spencer has already made dinner and it smelled amazing..

"Well well. Did you have fun with momma?"

"Yes, mommy. But I hungwy"

"Dinner is ready baby girl. Ash? Do you want to stay?"

"I..I.. guess. If you don't mind"

"I don't mind."

"Ok, then"

We sat there again together as we used too. Like a family. They say that when you lose something then you know how you missed it.

We put Christine in bed and we got downstairs. I guess it is now or never eh?

"Spence?"

"Yes?"

"Can we please sit?"

"What is going on Ashley?"

"Spence, I want you to hear me and not stop me. Ok? You are the best thing that happened to my life. I was so stupid for treating you as I did. And I wish I could go back and change it. I want you to know that I never loved someone as much as I love you. I want you to know that I'll try my best to be the person you want me to be. And I have to say to you something else.."

"Just tell me Ash.."

"I'm leaving"

"You what?"

"I'm leaving for four months to go to that tour"

"But.. you told me that you wouldn't. You told me that you would quit.."

"And I will. After this tour. I guess I needed to go to clear my head and give you space. We need to find ourselves again and I need to be the person you deserve."

"And you will find it going away?"

"Yes."

"You made your choice then."

"I'm sorry Spence"

"For what?"

"For this.." and I kissed her. It wasn't a hard kiss. It wasn't a passionate kiss. It was a simple loving kiss. I just wanted to feel her lips on me again..

"Why you did this?"

"Because I needed to"

"When do you leave?"

"In two weeks"

"And when will you come back?"

"In August. But it's a US tour. So I'll be here"

"Here and not here"

"Can I call you sometime?"

"Of course you can call me. What are we going to say to Christine?"

"That I have to go for a while and then I will be back to her and her mommy"

"So.. you will come back to me?"

"I could never leave you even if I wanted to. Do you remember? I told you once that you have my heart. So I will always return back to the one who has my heart"

"So..?"

"So.. this isn't a goodbye. It's an I see you soon. And I hope I can be the person you want me to be"

"Ash.. you know I love you and I hate that we are in this situation but I want you to know that I love you no matter what. I love you for what you are. Don't you ever forget that.."

I guess that we said what we had to say one more time. But this time it was good. Although we said these things to each other. We said that we love each other; we still are on a break. But not for long because when I'll return Spencer and I will be together again. And this time I'll do everything right…

* * *

**TBC**

**Wow. That was long! Hope you liked it. I did. So.. bye guys for now.. Till the next chapter..**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**xx**


	28. Chapter 28

**Hey guys.. One day till Friday!! Yay! And then Saturday!!! Today was ok! I didn't have to go to work and I've been out almost all day! But now that I'm back I can't stay away from writing this story so here is another update!**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 28**

I didn't want to leave. I didn't want to go to that tour. But this tour would be my closure. And then I can be who I want to be. Who I wanted to be from the beginning. Don't misunderstand me. I love singing. It is my passion. But this last year my passion is none other than Spencer and a little blond called Christine. They are my passion. If I want a future with them, singing is not the option. I don't want to become my father. I could never be my father to Christine.

Although I don't like being away for four months, I guess it's something like isolation. I saw Spencer's face when I told her. She thought that I was leaving her. That we actually breaking up. But I couldn't. This woman became everything to me. I want to leave so I can back to her like a fiancée, a wife, a mother. And this tour will do us both good.

Three weeks passed so fast and it was time for me to leave. I hope that four months will pass as fast. Spencer told me if I wanted for them to come and say goodbye at the airport. At first I thought about it. I didn't want to have to say goodbye to them. It would be the first time since we got together that I would be absent for so long. But when I thought it again I said yes because I wanted to see their faces before I go. I wanted to remember them while I was up there singing. They would meet me at the airport. I couldn't go there and take them from Spence's house because Ian wanted to go with a limo and everything. Big star blah blah blah.

"Ian.. I can't understand why we couldn't go to Spener's house and take them with us"

"Ashley, when will you understand? It is bad enough that you quit. At least your last minutes as a star behave like a star. It won't hurt"

"Whatever. But I'm saying.. I'll meet them there and I will be with them till I have to go on board"

"Ashley.."

"This is final."

"They will be paparazzis"

"Don't care. Unless is another psycho out there looking for my girlfriend"

"Ashley Davies, I will miss you"

"Quite the opposite for me Ian. Sorry."

I keep checking my watch. I told Spencer that my flight was at 10.30am. I had to be there two hours earlier for the check in and have my last minutes with my girls..

When I got out from the limo paparazzis were everywhere. They asked questions about my health, about the psycho, Spencer and I, my tour. Everything they thought they should ask. My answers were laconic and I didn't want to give them anything to relay on. All I wanted was to get inside and find Spencer..

Do you ever feel that you know where someone is? Without looking you feel that heart beat stronger than any other? I didn't see her. I just felt her. And when I found her our eyes met..

"Spence? Did you wait for long?"

"No. We were on time"

"Momma.."

"Princess.. where is momma's kiss?"

"Aww mommy.. You awe silly like mommy"

"Only with you and your mommy" I said to my little blond looking at Spencer..

"Did you have problem outside? I saw some paparazzis when we arrived. I tried for them not to see me."

"Glad they didn't."

"_Ashley? We have to go to the check in. You will have time to talk to Spencer"_Ian said coming behind us..

"Grrr… I swear.. Sometimes I have this feeling that I'm killing him"

"It's ok. Go and we will be here waiting."

"Sorry Spence.."

"Go.."

Of course Spencer and Christine couldn't come with me till I passed the check in. But I wanted to have them as long as I could. So.. when I booked my ticket, I booked another two for Spencer and Christine so I can have them till it was time for me to leave. I wish they could come with me but it wasn't possible.

"Ok. We can go now"

"What about Ian?"

"He is a big boy. He can find his way to the right gate."

When we arrived in front of the Duty Free Spencer was ready to say goodbye but I stopped her before she said anything..

"What?"

"You are coming with me."

"Ash.. we can't get in" I showed her the tickets and I saw her eyes. "Ash.. we can't leave. You know that"

"I know. I just wanted to be with you guys till it was time for me to leave. And the only way was to buy you tickets so you could come with me to the gate"

She didn't say anything. I saw her eyes and they were shining..

"Would you give me the honor to accompany me?"

"Momma.. you awe the best"

"No.. You are the best princess.. Spence.. are you coming?" I gave her my hand so we could walk together. My girls and I.

We were on the gate and waiting till it was time to call my flight..

"I will miss you. We will miss you"

"I'll miss you too. Promise me you will be ok? Know that mind will be with you guys every time"

"Call us whenever you can."

"I'll video phone you. I want to be able to see my baby girl. What do you say little one?"

"Momma? What is video phone?"

"When I'll call you you will see me. It will be like I am next to you"

"Awww.. good."

"Spence?"

"Hmmm..?"

"This.. is not a break. This is a closure I have to make. So I can come back to you and be devoted to you and Christine. Could we please forget what happened the last month? Like it never happened?"

"I know what you are saying.. I want you back to us but I don't want for you to feel obligated and stop doing what you love."

"I will continue what I love but I will be there for you. Not paparazzis, not crazy psychos. Just you, me and our daughter. And hopefully another daughter or son?"

"Come back and we discuss it. Ok?"

"So.. do we forget what happened? Please?"

"Ash, I forgot everything the moment I saw you with Christine the next day."

"So we are ok?"

"Yes, we are ok"

"So I can call you my baby again?"

"You can call me whatever"

"I can't.. We have a child with us"

"Momma.. I'm you baby giwl"

"You are princess. But mommy is my baby.. baby.. woman?"

"You awe silly momma"

"Yes, you are baby" Spencer said smiling at me..

"I missed this. I missed you calling me baby."

"Baby. Baby. Baby.."

"Now who is the silly one?".

"You again.."

"Ha ha ha. Make fun of the rock star"

_Flight OS315 to San Francisco. You may go on __board_

"This is me."

"Ash, please be careful. You are still recovering. Don't do flip flops on stage. Don't run, don't.."

"Spence.. I'm ok. I will be careful if you promise me you will do the same. Ok? And princess? Take good care of mommy. Ok? Be nice, and not naughty."

"Momma, I'm a big giwl"

"Yes you are baby.. You are.." I picked her up to hold her in my arms.. I would see her in four months..

I looked Spencer straight in her eyes. There was silence..

"Spence?"

"Mmm..?"

"Think of me. Ok? I will call you the moment the plane lands. I will call you every day."

"Whenever you have time call me. I will be waiting.."

"Bye baby"

"Bye baby. Watch the groupies. Don't let anyone woo you"

"Like I would let anyone woo me aside from you. So.. bye my beautiful girls.. See you in four months.."

"Bye momma.."

I took one last look before I get in. But I couldn't leave if I didn't kiss her.. I throw my bag down and run to her side and placed my hands to her face kissing her. It felt so good to feel her again. I missed everything.. And those kisses.. I felt her moan under my touches and I heard the last call for my flight..

"Sorry.. I couldn't leave without kissing you.."

"I'm not complaining.. But now I crave you and you are leaving me.."

"I'll call you.. bye baby" I kissed her one more time and got my bag and head to the gate..

Of course I had A class tickets. What a rock star I am? Before the captain tell us to close our phones I took my i-phone out and texted to Spencer..

_I miss you already.. Ash xx_

_I missed you the moment your lips left mine.. Spence xx_

_I am ridiculous in love with you.. Ash xx_

_And I am ridiculous in love with you.. Spence xx_

_You still there? Ash xx_

_I wait till I see your plane take off. Spence xx_

Before I answer her again I heard the captain telling us to turn off all digital devises. I wrote one last text to Spencer..

_Have to close my phone. Love you.. Ash xx_

_Love you too. Call me.. Spencer xx _

The plane took off and my emotions were mixed. I was sad because I was leaving behind my girlfriend and daughter and I was incredibly happy because I have her back. We were Spashley again. And we will be much better when I will be back.. For now.. San Francisco here I come..

* * *

**TBC**

**Sorry it's not too long but I have a headache.. Probably I shouldn't get out three times today. And I have to go to work tomorrow!! :(**

**Thank you all so so much for reading and reviewing.. You know that reviews are always welcome..**

**Till the next chapter (that means tomorrow)**

**xx**


	29. Chapter 29

**Two words! Just Friday!!! Super yay!! Two days of sleeping and going out! Do I ask much if right now was summer, August to be more accurate? Nah.. Enjoy the new chapter!!**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 29**

Touring for four months! Basically Ian told me that we had to go to San Francisco, New York, New Jersey, Boston, Chicago, Ohio, Texas, and last but not least California. When I saw the program instantly my eyes got wide. My last stop would be the place that holds my heart.

I didn't say that to Spencer because I wanted to be a surprise. Of course she knew for all the places I would go. But not one. I would tell her when we were going back..

When we landed to San Francisco airport I did as I promise. I called Spencer and told her that I was landed one piece. I thank technology for one thing. Although it brings isolation and you lose human contact when you use it for good you can have next to you the ones you love. And having a 500 dollar mobile phone with video call, then it makes me super happy that I have technology inside my pocket!

"Hey baby. I am here at last. I thought we would never land. I was bored. Thank God I had my ipod with me"

"Hey rock star. You won't stop whining. Don't you?"

"I'm not whining. I'm just saying."

"How was the flight?"

"Good. I wanted to tease Ian but as clever as he is he booked his sit away from mine. And I didn't bother to get up. I was so comfy to my leather sit.."

"Always the princess.."

"I miss you Spence. I miss you already.. What are we going to do? It's not even a day that I am away from you and I already have a Spencer addict syndrome."

"I miss you too. I realized that this is a the first time that we are apart from each other for so long.."

"Yes, it is. I hope you could come to one of the cities.."

"I know baby. I wished that too. But I can't leave work.. But I will watch you.. Every time.. What time is your first gig tomorrow?"

"We have to be at the theatre earlier for rehearsals and sound check. The gig starts at 7pm but I guess I have to be there from 2pm."

"Ash.. please watch yourself out there. Ok?"

"I'll try my best doctor.."

"I mean it. Don't push yourself.."

"Yes, mother.."

"Ashley.."

"Ok, yes. I will be careful. Ok? Promise.."

Before I continue my sweet talk with Spencer I saw Ian waving me to close the phone and head out. Yeah.. Will I ever miss this?? No.. Because sooner or later I would be behind bars for killing Ian..

"Baby, sorry. I have to go. Ian is an ass.."

"Ok, Ash. Talk to you later. Ok?"

"I'll call you to say goodnight to Christine.. Bye baby.."

"Bye baby."

Of course leaving the airport, there were paparazzis outside and a black limo waiting for us.

"_Ashley, here. Where __are you heading next after San Francisco?"_

"We are going to the big apple. New York will be our next stop."

"_What about you and Spencer?"_

"What about me and Spencer?"

"_How she feels about you leaving for so long and having groupies to your feet? I am sure there a lot of girls and boys who want your attention?"_

"I won't comment on that because I don't have to. My personal life is separated from all this. And ask something that has to do with my tour."

"_We learned that the person who stubbed you is behind bars. How do you feel about this?"_

I didn't answer him. That reporter was a scamp. I hate them. When they ask these things.. I walked inside my car and left. I would care less for what they were going to say later..

"Ashley, you had to answer to the question"

"Ian.. Please.. We came here for the tour. They should ask about the tour and not my personal life"

"But, you are famous Ashley. They want to ask you things. And you being public with Spencer.."

"Don't you dare speak for Spencer. Do you know what Ian? When all this finish I'll be a happy woman.."

"Are you sure you won't miss all the attention?"

"No, because I have all the attention I need."

And I have all the attention I need. I don't want anyone else to notice me because Spencer notices me and that's what I want. We got to my hotel and I needed a bath. A bath that would take all my tension away.

When I dried myself and was ready to go to sleep I made a last phone call. I needed to say my goodnight to my two favorite girls..

"Hey you.."

"Hey.."

"You sound exhausted.."

"I am Spence."

"I saw you on tv. You were beautiful.."

"Oh.. What did they say?"

"Basically.. I was looking at you and didn't hear what they said. But this reporter asking you this questions.. I'm sorry Ash.."

"For what? You didn't do anything.. I am so glad that I'm quitting after this.."

"I hope you are sure.."

"I am 1000 per cent sure Spence.."

"Wait.. I have someone here who wants to talk to you.."

"Momma.. whewe awe you?"

"Here baby.."

"But.. I not see you.."

"Oh.. wait.. Close the phone and I'll call you again so you can see me.."

I change my simple call to a video call so I can see my girls..

"Now, you see momma?"

"Momma.. you awe in the phone.."

"Ha ha.. Yes, I am princess.. Where is mommy so I can see her too?"

"Hewe. Mommy? You see momma?"

"Hey baby.."

"Good to see you Spence.."

"I miss you.." and I saw her eyes saying different things. I saw the love, the lust, the passion..

"I miss you more.."

"Mommies.."

"I miss my baby princess too. Sorry Spence.."

"Forgiven.. Baby girl.. Say goodnight to momma because she has to sleep like you do.."

"Bye momma. Dweam us.."

"I will baby girl."

"I guess we won't talk tomorrow.."

"I'll try baby. If I have a break I'll try to call you. Have your phone with you at anytime.."

"I will.. I.. Love you Ash..".

"I love you too. Sleep well.."

"You too.."

"Bye love.."

"Bye baby.."

Now.. it's a big day tomorrow.. We were staying to San Francisco for two weeks. Aside for the gigs that Ian booked I had to be on some local channels as well talking for the tour. And that would do to any city I would go.. Nice..

**

Three months and counting.. My last states were Texas and California.. Another month of gigs.. Last month I was feeling dizzy. I guess I couldn't keep my promise to Spencer and I pushed myself to much. I didn't say her anything because I didn't want to scare her and if I knew her well she would yell all over the phone and maybe took the next flight to where I was. And I wouldn't want her for her to do such a thing.. I went to a doctor and he told me that it was from the stress and I should be more careful.. I can't wait till I return back to Cali..

I talked to Spencer every morning and every night. And every time Spencer would tell me to be careful because she could see me.. They didn't show all the gigs but they showed half an hour. I was trying really hard not to show on the stage that I wanted to vomit.. And I was trying so hard to hide it as well from Spencer.. I guess it was to early to do this tour..

After finishing the tour in Texas we were packing again but this time to California. And it was the right time to tell Spencer..

I didn't call her with video call this time. I didn't want for her to see how pale I was but I am sure she would know from my voice..

"Hey baby.."

"Hey.. why you are not calling with video call?"

"I tried but it was no use.. I guess there is something here with the signal.."

"Are you ok? Because you sound .. tired.."

"I am Spence.. I can't wait to come back.."

"Where is your last stop?"

"California baby. My last stop will be you.."

"Ash.. why you didn't tell me?"

"I wanted to be a surprise.."

"When are you coming?"

"We finished here and we are packing.. In two days I'll be there singing to you.."

"I so definitely coming to hear you baby.."

"I am so definitely arranged that.. Tomorrow a guy will come by your place to give you passes so you can be backstage."

"I am so happy. Oh my God.. I am going to see you after all these months.."

"Can't wait either baby.."

"Ash.. you sure you are ok?"

"I'm sure. Don't worry. You see .. I am exhausted because last night I had sex with a beautiful blond.. You know I have a thing for blonds"

"I hope you are kidding because.."

"Of course I am kidding. Although I had some groupies here and there wanted to woo me. But I told them that I was sold.."

"Good answer.."

"Come on Spence.. Even if I am surrounded by 1000 blonds not any of them could reach your beauty. You have me whipped."

"Good answer again.. Because if I see anyone touch you.."

"Mmmm… bossy.. I like it.."

"Wait till you come back home. It's been a long time.."

"Hmm.. care to have a quickie from the phone baby..?"

"As much I would like to have sex from you from the phone I am at work and that would be inappropriate.."

"Damn… Why your hospital can't be like Seatle's Grey?"

"Seatle's Grey?"

"You know.. From Grey's Anatomy.."

"Do you always think of sex?"

"Only when I am talking to you, or touching you, or.. feeling you.."

"Hmm.. Ash.. you make me wet only by your voice.."

"Wait till I put my fingers.."

"Ash.. stop.. please.. I think I will come only by you talking to me.."

"Hmm.. nice to know that.."

"Now.. go to rest. Ok? And can't wait to see you baby.."

"The passes are for the big gig. It will be to the Golden Bear's arena."

"Ok baby. Talk to you tomorrow."

"Bye Spence. Give a kiss to Christine.."

"Will do baby. Bye.."

When I finished talking to Spencer I got inside the toilet vomiting. How I managed to keep talking to Spencer without she knew I don't know.. Can't wait for this tour to be over..

The next two days I was feeling nauseous. Ian saw it but didn't say anything. I had to finish this tour one piece. Other than that I had a sharp pain where I had the stitches.

"Ashley.. you have to finish this. One and for all." I said to myself. Glad that was no one near me to hear me talk to myself.

In California I didn't have to do many gigs. One big one and an interview to the local channel.

"Baby? Are you ready for tonight?"

"Yes, I am ready to see you again if you mean that."

"I have the pass. I'll be there earlier if you don't mind. I can't wait to see you"

"Don't mind baby. What about Christine?"

"I thought of bringing her with me but she is so small. Glen will watch her."

"You are so lucky to have him.."

"Yes, I am. As lucky as having you.."

"No no no. I am the lucky one. I want you to know that. I want you to know that I love you. I never loved someone as much as I love you. You changed me Spence. You make me be a good person every day. You are everything to me.."

"Ash.. I feel the same.. Why you are telling me that? What is going on?"

"Nothing is going on. I just wanted to tell you that"

"Ash.. what time you have to be there?"

"Round two."

"I'll be there. I will be inside. Call me when you arrive. Ok?"

"Ok, baby. See you in a few hours.."

Ok. Now she will see me and she will know that something is going on. I have to get ready and do my make up so she can't see the black circles and the paleness in my face..

When I arrived to the arena Spencer was there. She called me before to tell me she was backstage already.. I couldn't wait to see her and touch her..

"You like the view?"

"Ash.. Oh my God.. You are here.. Oh, my God.. I missed you baby.. I missed you so much"

"Miss you too baby. You can't imagine how much"

"Ash.. you lost some weight.. Didn't you eat?"

"I did.. But with all this I guess it was hard to stay on my weight.."

"Ash.. you look pale, tired.. Baby.. are you sure you are ok?"

"Yes, don't worry.. I have to start the rehearsals. Ok? You'll be here?"

"Of course."

"Ok, guys.. Let's start. It will be a hell of a gig. I want you to give your best performance.."

The nausea I felt, the dizziness, the pain in my guts got harder. While I was singing I felt my senses leaving me. I couldn't hear, I couldn't see. And I fainted..

"_Oh, my God.. Call a doctor.. Ashley fainted."_

"_Where is she? Oh, my God. Ash.. baby.. wake up.. wake up baby. Someone call the ambulance.. Her pulse is slow."_

"_Spencer, I called them. They will be here in a minute. Did she open her eyes?"_

"_NO, Ian. She didn't. Did she have any problems?"_

"_She felt dizzy and went to see a doctor"_

"_What did he say?"_

"_I don't know. I didn't ask her."_

"_Are you serious? You had her continue with the gigs although she felt that way?"_

"_She said she was fine"_

"_Clearly she wasn't. Oh, Ash.. Why you didn't tell me? Why baby?"_

I opened my eyes slowly and I saw her standing on top. She is the most beautiful girl in the world..

"Because.. I .. didn't.. want.. to.. scare you"

"Ash.. don't you ever lie to me again. Ever.. The ambulance is here. I'll come with you."

"_Sorry Ms. We have to take her."_

"I'm coming with."

"_Are you family?"_

"Her fiancée"

* * *

**TBC**

**Well.. I had them meet but it was stressful?? Let's see what is going to happen from then on..**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**xx**


	30. Chapter 30

**Well.. What can I say?? Saturday rules!! Do you know the song of Alicia's Keys 'Falling' how it starts? Well in my case.. 'I keep on writing…' Hope you like this chapter as much as the others..**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 30**

Someone could call me selfish. Some other could call me stubborn! For your information I am both. Why? Well I don't have an answer to give you. Well now that I think about it someone could say that I do it to get attention. Come on people.. I have all the attention I want. So push myself or do dangerous things it's not for attention..

Do you remember when I told you that I was a bitch? Well I still am. But when it comes to my family, when it comes to my friends I will risk my life any time. But they don't have to know..

In this tour I pushed myself really hard. Like really really hard. I felt my body give up enough times but I pushed it behind. Because I knew it was my last tour and I wanted to give them the best of me. I don't like people see my pain, my sadness any feelings I have. I play it hard, tough and this time it came around and hit me hard..

The sad thing is that I put Spencer in this position again.. When I was stubbed she thought she will lose me. Then I broke my stitches because I wanted to have sex; Sex.. I haven't had sex for a long long time.. Ok.. coming back to earth..

And then although I knew I had to be more careful and Spencer instantly told me to be careful and don't push myself I did the opposite..

And now I am on the back of the ambulance, with oxygen on my face again and Spencer is here with me holding my hand. I try to open my eyes so I can see her but I can't. I feel so weak. So broken. I hope they tell me that I am ok because I don't want for Spencer to feel worry again.. And I saw her after four months in this state. I guess all I can say is 'well done Ashley. You fucked yourself one more time'.

"Spe-nce..?"

"Ash.. don't talk. You have oxygen"

"Spe-nce?"

"Ash please.. we are near to the hospital.."

I can' see her but I hear her. And her voice is broken like I am. I made her worry again.. And she is still here holding my hand..

"_What we have here?"_

"_Ashley Davies. She collapsed on stage. She was out for several minutes"_

"_Take her to curtain four"_

"_Yes sir."_

They did some checks on me. They wanted to see my blood pressure. And I saw a familiar face once again..

"Ashley Ashley.. You seem to really love us here. We missed you"

"Doc.."

"What happened again?"

"She pushed herself John. She was feeling dizzy for a month and maybe more." That was my Spencer. Clearly when you have a doctor for a fiancée.. You know what I mean..

"Ashley, what you were feeling and for how long?"

I took the oxygen mask away from my face so I could speak properly.. I looked at Spencer and I guess I couldn't lie anymore. If you are going to be with the person you love for eternity then lies are not the best way to start a new life..

"It all started two months ago. At the beginning I was feeling dizzy and I thought it was nothing. Maybe I was stressed. So all I did was to take some pain killers so I could feel better. You know being on stage for several hours and then going to local channels to give interviews. I felt tired but I thought it was because it was natural to feel like that. After a month I started to feel a sharp pain where I had the stitches. I had this pain inside. But once again I thought it was because I did the performance on stage. The last two weeks the pain was just unbearable. I threw up some times. I couldn't eat or drink. And then here we are. I collapsed on stage.."

John didn't have the chance to speak because Spencer was the first one to speak. I saw her look. She wasn't mad or angry. She was disappointed. I don't know what is better. For someone to feel disappointed over you or be angry?

"Ash.. why you didn't tell me any of this? We talked two times a day, every day for four months."

"Spence.. I didn't want for you to worry. And I thought it wasn't anything important"

"Anything important? I understand about the dizziness but Ash.. you felt pain, you threw up. Several times as you said. Why you didn't say anything then?"

"Because I would be back and it wasn't that big of a deal."

"If something happened to me or Christine how would you feel? Would you like to stay at the dark? Not know anything?"

"I would feel like you feel Spence. I would want to know. Sorry"

"With you I feel like I am aging so very fast.."

"Sorry.."

"Don't try to hide anything for me please. Ok? We are together in everything. Don't you ever forget that. And stop telling me sorry"

"So-.. Ok"

John saw that this was between us and left the moment Spencer started to speak. After 15 minutes he was back holding a folder and I assume it was my examinations. Hope everything is fine because I don't care for myself but Spencer. I don't think she can take it..

"Spencer? Ashley? I have the checks we did to you"

"How is she John? Can I see it?"

"Spencer.. you are not a doctor today. Sit with Ashley."

"What is it doc? Am I dying?" I saw Spencer's look and it was a 'shut the fuck up'.

"Ashley, the blood test we did showed us that your white blood cells are over the upper limits"

"What does this mean?"

"This means that it is bad but if you have the right medication everything is going to be fine"

"But how John?"

"Ashley had two surgeries in one month. Her body didn't react well and then with her tour and pushing herself hard this was the result. Her body couldn't protect her aymore"

"Am I dying doc?"

"If you weren't here and if you didn't collapse I don't know Ashley. Maybe we could have a problem. But you are lucky because we can treat it."

"Are you sure John? Will she be ok?"

"She will have to get rest for some days and take her medication"

"Ok. Thank you John"

"Ashley.. although I like seeing you please come only for a visit"

"Promise doc"

When john left us alone again I could sense the tension from fifty meters away. Spencer seemed skeptical and I didn't want to be the first one to talk but I guess I should..

"Spence?" she looked at me and I saw her teary eyes. I made her cry..

"Spence? Please don't cry.."

"Ash.. do you know what that means? Do you?"

"Mmm.. no.. John said it is ok"

"No it is not ok. Why you keep playing with your life? Why? Don't you care for us?"

"Spence? What are you saying? Of course I care. I care so much"

"If you cared for us then we wouldn't be here. We would be at our house, with our daughter, cuddling, watching some lame dvd."

"I don't know what to say.."

"I want you to know that I am not mad or angry. Actually I am angry because you never listen. You want to do everything by yourself. But Ash.. you need to let people help you sometimes. You need to let me be there for you.."

"I know Spence. I will try. But I didn't tell you something because really I thought it was nothing. And if I told you you would come where I was and .."

"Stop. Ok? Let me decide what I would do or will do from now on."

"Ok. Am I forgiven?"

"I don't know yet. I'll have to think about it."

"I will be here waiting you know."

"I know. Now get rest. I'll be here"

"Don't leave Spence.."

"I won't. Now close your eyes"

"Will you hold me?"

She came by my side and took me in her arms. Do you ever feel safe with someone? I feel safe when she holds me. When she is near me. When she touch me. I guess we will get through this together.

**

It was a week since I got out from the hospital. I was feeling much worst. I had to take 5 different medications. Each one did something different but all together fixed the problem I had with my blood cells. Taking so many drugs put me down to hibernation. I wanted to sleep and I didn't have the strength to walk on my own. Spencer was practically my nurse. I knew she wanted to take care of me and for once I let her. I should stop being selfish and stubborn. She was there feeding me, bathing me, putting me on bed. And although she thought that I was sleeping, sometimes I could see her cry. When she was with me she put a smile on her face and I knew it was a forced smile. Her crying when she thought I was sleeping it was something I didn't like..

"Baby? It's time for your medication" I knew I looked like hell. But when I looked at those beautiful blue eyes of hers I knew I was the most beautiful girl on the world. I tried to get up but it was still difficult for me. But she was there to help me as always.

"How you feel today baby?"

"Pitchy"

"Let me see if you have still fever" yes, I guess for me to get better I have to get worst first. Tough week. Very tough.

"You are still warm. Are you feeling dizzy?"

"I'm fine Spence. I just need to lay down for a while"

She didn't wait for me to tell her to lay next to me. She just did. She put her hands round my waist and I sensed her breath on my neck. I wanted so much to kiss her but I could barely stand.

"I love you so much Ash.."

"Love you too Spence. Thank you"

"For what?"

"Taking care of me"

"I will always take care of you"

"I'm sorry for everything"

"I want you to feel well and be so full of yourself again. I missed my Ashley"

"It's right here. She just can't stand on her own for now. But she will be back"

All this talk made me to vomit. I didn't speak so much for a week because when I did I felt nauseous. Spencer had a bucket next to my bed so when I felt the need to throw up I wouldn't have to move. And that's what I did. Spencer held my hair till I finished. She had already a wet towel for my forehead. I feel like shit..

"Baby? Are you feeling better?"

"Mmm.. better"

"We will get pass this Ash.. You have to be strong"

"I am because you are."

"Sleep now baby. I'll be here."

* * *

**TBC**

**Well.. I don't about medicine but all I can say is that when your white blood cells are high you have a problem. A friend's son had his white blood cells round 21000 when the limit is 8000-11000 I think. That can cause leukemia and other deceases. Well.. Hope you liked it.**

**Reviews are always welcome**

**xx**


	31. Chapter 31

**Why?? Oh why tomorrow has to be Monday?? And why do I have to get up at 7.30?? Don't like it at all.. Ok I stop the whinnying now and letting you read.. Enjoy the new chapter...**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 31**

It sucks being sick. It sucks when you can't do anything. And it sucks when you know you put yourself in this state. Will I ever do something like that again? Nooo.. Will I tell Spencer everything I feel? Yeeesss.. I learned my lesson on the hard way.

Last week it was the week from hell. It was the first week that I took my medicine and I was feeling like shit. I couldn't see anyone and I didn't want anyone to see me like this. I had visitors but they only spoke with Spencer. I told Spencer that I didn't want for Christine to see me like this, specially the first days. I heard her once telling Christine that 'momma is sick baby and she needs to rest'. After three days of that I remember a little visitor that I couldn't not let inside. She was my little girl and although I didn't want her for her to see me like this I tried to hide my pain as much as I could.

I was resting in our bed, curtains closed and I heard a crack at the door. I couldn't turn to see who it was. If it was Spencer she would come straight to bed to see if I was ok but this visitor hesitated.

"Yes?"

"Momma?"

"Princess?" she was still hesitant of doing a step forward. I guess she was still thinking what Spencer told her. We think that children are young and don't understand but I think that children understand and see things better than us.

"Momma you ok?"

"I try baby."

"Can I come thewe?"

"Of course baby. But watch where you are going to sit" I saw her walking slow to my bed and climbing it so she could be beside me.

"You huwt momma?"

"Not now but I did baby.." she put her little hand to my cheek and caressed it. Sometimes all you need is a hug or a touch. And when it is from your child you feel much better in time.

"I huwt you momma?"

"Of course not baby girl." She caressed my face and then put her hands on my hair..

"You awe pwetty momma. Always"

"And I think you are beautiful"

We stayed there for a while facing each other. I wanted so much to hold her in my arms but the pain was unbearable. I still was weak after all and I just couldn't. She didn't ask me anything else. We just sat there looking each other.

I heard Spencer downstairs calling for Christine and then I heard her stepping the stairs. So I think when you are a mother you feel where your child is no matter what. But although I didn't give birth to Christine I feel the same sometimes.

"Chistine? What are you doing here baby? I told you not to wake momma"

"It's ok Spence. She didn't"

"Mommy sowwy. I wanted to see momma"

"Baby, I told you momma was sick and she needs to get rest."

"Baby, please. It is ok. I guess I needed her here. I need both of you here"

"Let me see if you have a fever. How you feel today?"

"Better than yesterday but still the same."

"You don't have a fever so I think that is good"

"When are you going to work?"

"When you will be back to me as you were before you left me"

"Spence.. I don't want you to take another sabbatical. Ok? I don't need anything. If you let the pills where I can find them you will come home and I will be here. I can't go anywhere"

"Don't argue with me. I think I made myself clear. You and Christine come first. And in your condition I can't leave you. All day I'll be thinking of you."

"Why don't we hire a nurse or something? Someone you could trust. I don't have a problem"

"I have a problem because I love taking care of you. Ok? Now.. lets take your medicine."

"Whatever my beautiful fiancée says"

"Sweet talker"

We laid there, the three of us. We had Christine in the middle. We looked each other and we didn't need words to say what we were feeling. You know when someone really loves you when they stick with you not only in good but in worst. Basically in worst.

After two weeks I was feeling myself again. It was the day when I would go to the doctor to check on me to see if my blood cells were back to normal. The dizziness was long lost so did the pain and the nausea. To say I was feeling much better would be true. And I thank Spencer for that. She was next to me all the time. I owe her that.

"Ash, are you ready baby?"

"Yeah, I am coming." I took one last look on the mirror. Yes, Ashley Davies was back.

"Hey, once a charmer always a charmer"

"You know it baby."

"Oh, Ash.. I am so so happy that you are feeling better. That you seem better."

"Me too baby. And it is because of you"

"It is because of you. I didn't do anything."

"You think. Now.. come on. John is waiting. Can I have a kiss?"

"You can have many kisses but now I can give you one." She kissed my lips so lovingly. I didn't taste her for so long. We would kiss but not lips to lips. It would be kisses on my forehead or my chick. I guess she didn't want to put us on this situation and my mouth was dry so I didn't want to kiss her and she would remember that. Remember my sickness..

We were at the hospital and I was feeling nervous. What if I wasn't ok? What if I had some other problem? What ifs running through my mind. Spencer sensed my nervousness and held me tighter assuring me that everything would go fine.

"Ashley, Spencer. Nice seeing you two"

"Hey John. How are you?"

"Hey doc"

"I'm ok. We missed you here."

"I had a patient at home. So I had my hands full" Spencer looked at me sgiving her best smile.

"Ashley, how are you feeling?"

"Much better now doc. Much much better. But the first week was hell"

"Yeah, I know. The drugs you had to take were strong. We had to fight to bring your blood cells back to normal. So are you ready for a blood test?"

"Yes, I guess so."

"Spencer, will you wait here? We won't take more than five minutes"

"Look after my girl John."

"I'll be back baby. Ok?" I kissed her again because it is addicted to kiss her. It's like Pringles. After the pop you can't stop. Look at me.. I make jokes. I guess I am fine..

I took the blood test and having a fiancée as a doctor and her best co-worker as your doctor as well it makes things easier. We had the results right away. Well, after an hour or so but the thing is that I was scared. Once I saw John holding the results I took Spencer's hand on mine and squeezed it hard. I hope I didn't break it or something..

"Well, I have the results and I have to say.."

"Say it doc. Say it like you pull a bandage.."

"Ashley, you are fine. Your white blood cells are back to normal and you can start your normal life again. But, please be careful. Don't do irrational things that can bring you back here. I meant it when I told you come here only to pay us a visit."

"John, can I see it please?"

"I guess once a doctor always a doctor eh?"

"Baby, you are fine. We are fine. Oh, my God thank you so much"

"We are fine eh?"

"Come here.." she hugged me and kissed me like we didn't kiss I don't know for how long. We didn't care who was with us or behind us for that matter. I just kissed her. It was a deep kiss; I felt our tongues fight for dominance. We kissed and kissed when I heard someone cough..

"Ahem.. sorry for interrupt girls.."

"Yes, doc?"

"I am sure you are happy but .."

"I get your point. Nothing to worry about. Just a question though"

"Yes, Ashley?" I leaned to his side whispering..

"Can I have sex now? I mean I don't have a problem or anything?" I saw his look and it was funny. I guess I gave him something to thing after..

"I.. Ehm.. I guess.. but nothing to hard"

"Ok.. Thank you doc. See you around"

"Ash.. what did you say to him. I think his jaw dropped"

"Well.. I asked him if I could have sex"

"Ashley, really? Oh, my God"

"What? I wanted to know if I would be able to make love to you. Did I do something wrong?"

"I guess not. So.. can you?"

"What do you think?"

"I guess I will find out?"

"Oh, yes.."

"Do you want to go to Christine's school first and take her with us? We could go to the sea"

"Of course. I love it. I missed the sea. Spence?"

"Yes?"

"Do you know what I think?"

"Tell me.."

"Well we are engaged and we are going to marry and I already live with you.."

"Ash.."

"Ok.. I was thinking to buy a beach house and live there. The three of us. What do you think?"

"Are you serious?"

"Ehm.. yes.. but if you don't want.. it's ok.."

"Oh baby.. Of course.. I love it. I love you Ms Davies"

"Really? I love you too soon to be Mrs Davies"

"Can't wait.."

"So when do you want to start searching for the best beach house?"

"Whenever you want"

"Ok. We are moving.."

"We are moving baby.."

We took Christine from the day care and went to the sea. The sea always made me feel so calm. And when you sit there with the love of your life and your daughter everything seem so easy, so simple. And I love it.

Christine was playing with the sand. She didn't have her swimsuit as it was a rash thinking to come on the beach. But I bought her a swimsuit from a beach store there so she could swim if she wanted to. I always have blankets and towels inside the car. We sat there till the sun set. It was a beautiful day that ended as beautiful.

"Did you have fun princess?"

"Yes, momma. It was pewfect"

"Are you cold?"

"Nah.. Can I sit with mommy and you?"

"Of course baby girl.."

We took her in our arms and we watched the sunset.

* * *

**TBC**

**No my friends.. No… I have many chapters to write.. We didn't finish yet. We have a wedding, a honey moon, kids, and some years later.. And you will know that this story is finished when you will read THE END than TBC..**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**Till the next chapter (tomorrow)**

**xx**


	32. Chapter 32

**Hey guys.. Sorry I couldn't update yesterday but here I am today!! Hope everyone is ok! I want to thank you so much for all your wonderful reviews!!! This chapter will have some loving..  
**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 32**

_Ashley Davies__, after her incident at the stage while rehearsing is back home. She did her USA tour when in her last stop, California, collapsed on the stage. Her condition has been a private secret and now everyone wonders 'What is happening with Ms Rock Star? Why did she collapse? Is she pregnant? And what her other half has to say to that? I guess we all going to find out. Sooner or later'_

Why some people never give up? Why because someone is famous has to see his or her life in trash every day? What do they know? What do they know about me? How they say these things? This is getting in my nerves. I can't wait to leave this kind of business. Less drama and less publicity. It's the best for the kind of life I want for me and my family. I won't become another Branjelina.

"What are you reading again Ash?"

"Nothing."

"Well let me see" Spencer took the magazine and looked for herself. I could see her reading it and her expression; I think it was how mine were before 3 minutes.

"Let them say whatever they want Ash. We know the truth and that is what matters"

"But Spence.. Come on.. Pregnant? How on earth do they find such crap?"

"They want to write something"

"But they put you in the middle and I don't like that."

"Baby.. When we decided to be seen out together we knew that something like that would happen. Don't read them. It's just trash."

"So you don't care?"

"I want you to be ok. If you are ok I don't care"

"Well I am not ok but I guess I'll get it over."

"Well.. I have a question though.."

"Tell me" I took her in my lap while I had my head in her arm inhaling her intoxicated scent.

"About this pregnant thing.."

"Yeesss?"

"Well.. I was thinking.. maybe when we get married.. we could try.. for another baby?"

"Well.. my beautiful fiancée.. you read my mind. I wouldn't like it any other way.."

"Really?"

"Really. I would love to have another little Spencer running through our house"

"Well.. I would love to see a little Ashley doing the exact thing"

"Tough decision.. I guess we will see when the time comes.. But know that I would love to take care of you.."

"I know baby.. And I love you.."

"Hmm… well.. I love you too.."

From then on I had to think of my life with Spencer and Christine and I wouldn't let anyone to be between us. No one.

**

I remember the day I asked Dr. John about the sex thing. His jaw dropped. It's one thing to know that someone is gay and other thing that person asking you if she can have sex with her girlfriend.

The thing is that Spencer and I didn't do anything yet. After a week and still all we did was kissing and touching and that's it. To tell you the truth I was a little, tiny afraid of the outcome. And Spencer felt it. She knew me better that I knew myself. So we didn't rush things. She knew that when I would be ready I would jump on her. Well not jump.. but you know..

And the time was here. I wanted to be special. Like it was our first time again. Actually we didn't have sex for what? Five months? I believe I lost counting after one month.. So I did all the preparations. I even called Glen to come and get Christine. I would miss my little girl very much but I wanted to give her mommy some sugar.. Oh, my God.. Me talking like that? Well.. it's Spencer's mistake. Speaking for Spencer she was at the hospital working till 8pm today. So I told Glen to come and take Christine at 5 so I could have the place ready and wait for my queen..

"Baby girl?"

"Momma.."

"What are you doing sweetie?"

"Playing with my dolls momma.. See?"

"Well.. uncle Glen will come and get you and you will go to the park and play. What do you say?"

"Am I going to eat ice-cweam?"

"Well.."

"Come on momma.. pweaty please?"

"How I can resist to that pout eh?"

"I know.. haha"

"Be a good girl for uncle Glen.."

"Aha.. What you going to do momma?"

"Well I was thinking me and mommy relax a little. Mommy is very tired with all this and I thought I could cook for her and.."

"And kiss her?"

"yes, and kiss her"

"Nice momma. I think mommy will like it."

"I really hope so baby.."

I heard knocking on the door and I knew it was Glen, coming to take Christine. He is a good man. And one day he will be an excellent parent and will make a woman very happy. We are lucky to have them.

"Hey you.. Where is the little one?" I just nodded showing him she was in the living room..

"Hewe uncle Glen. Don't you see?"

"Christine? Well.. I can't see.. Where are you?"

"Hewe, hewe"

"Ah, there you are.. And I thought it was some little animal hoping on my feet"

"Uncle Glen.. You awe silly like momma"

"Silly eh? Are you ready squirt?"

"Yes, will you take me fow ice-cweam?"

"I don't know.. What momma says?"

"She said yes. Now let's go.."

"Feisty this young lady.."

"What can I say? She is a clone of Spencer. You know.. It's your sister"

"Have a good time you two. And don't worry for the time. I'll bring her back tomorrow.."

"Take care of my little girl. Ok? Now you young lady.. Give momma a kiss" I bend so I could reach her level and gave her her suck. She kissed me and then they left. I missed her already..

Well.. I had three hours till Spencer was home. Were to start? Cooking? Now that I think about it I never cooked before. And I don't want to set Spencer's house on fire and neither to poison her.. But I am good in ordering.. So yes.. Order from her favorite restaurant.. ok.. what else? A babble bath.. Maybe when it's time for her to get home so the water will be still warm.. Flowers.. Yes.. maybe I should get out and buy some flowers. Lilies.. Her favorite..

Without noticing it was already almost 8. I was sitting behind the window waiting for Spencer to come home. Everything was ready and perfect. She would be surprised..

I saw her parking her car and coming to the door. Before she could find her keys and open the door I opened the door for her. She had that amazing smile of hers whenever she would see me. And believe me.. I had the same one also..

"Baby? What are you doing here? And dressed like this?"

"What it seems? Waiting for my love to come home.. So.. welcome home my love" and I kissed her on her nose and then her lips. Nothing deep. Only love..

"Well.. hello to you too.."

She came in and I saw her standing for a little watching what I had prepared for her. I had candles light the room and our food on our plates waiting for us to sit down and eat.

"Where is Christine?"

"She is with Glen. He came and picked her up. He will bring her home tomorrow"

"You had it all prepared I see.. Ash.. what is all this?"

"Food.."

"I know silly.. Thank you very much. I mean why?"

"there is no reason to take care of my wife"

"Wife eh?"

"Well.. for me you already are. We only need a paper to assure that we are legally a couple."

"Did you cook?"

"Although I would like to say yes, no dear. This is your job. But.. I ordered from Tony's"

"You are the best wife.."

"I know.. Let me take your things and you sit.."

After an hour we were full. I do must say that I know how to order.. It's not an easy thing.. You have to know what goes with what.. And if my Spencer is ok then screw everything else..

"Ash.. it was perfect. Thank you so much.. But why you did all this?"

"I wanted for us to have some alone time. With all this, the tour, the hospital thing, my illness, I wanted for us to have something to relax. And I wanted to do something for you. It was always me all this long. So I wanted to be all you today.."

"How did I get so lucky?"

"I am the lucky one.. Now.. I have another surprise for you.. Give me your hand.."

"Ash.. you didn't have to. Dinner was perfect.."

"The night my love isn't over.. Yet.."

I held her hand till we reached the bathroom. I excused myself after we finished dinner so I could go up and prepare her babble bath.. Again I had candles round the tub and pedals of lilies to the water. Once again she was amazed..

"Ashh.. you didn't have to baby, but it is perfect.."

"You like?"

"I love it.."

I started unbutton her shirt, button to button, slowly letting my fingers touch her inside. I threw he shirt down and got to her pants. Doing the same thing trying to get her out of her clothes. No need for clothes when you are going to have a babble bath. She started breathing heavy and I knew she was feeling something down there because I had the same feeling..

Kissing her collarbone, letting her straps fall, touching her, kissing her I unbuttoned her bra and I had her naked but not completely. One thing was still on my way..

"Asssshhh.."

"yes…" she couldn't speak. Neither did I. I bend down on my knees and I took off her boy shorts kissing her centimeters apart from the place I sensed her warmth..

"Get inside baby. The water will be cold.."

"Come with me.."

I hesitated but come on. Naked Spencer, inside a tub. Yeah.. I thought that too. I stripped from my clothes and I joined her inside.

I let my hands travel her body; explore her in ways I hadn't for so long. And I missed every part of her. I never let my fingers get where they wanted to. But it doesn't mean they weren't close..

"Ash.. pleaseee.. baby… don't tease me.."

"I am not teasing you baby.. I just want to feel you.."

"And I want to feel you inside me.."

I didn't want to take her inside the bathroom. I was tempted but I didn't want to. Maybe I was teasing her after all. I knew she was already turned on and so did I. I guess our babble bath was coming to its end..

We were out of the tub wearing our bath robes. I knew her look. I knew she wanted me as much I wanted her. And her kisses weren't lying. We knew were this would go and it would be me on top of Spencer making love to her and feeling her..

"Ashh.. I want you so much baby.."

"Me too baby.."

"Do you think it is ok?"

"I don't think.. I know it is ok.. I am ready baby.."

"What if..?"

"No more ifs. It's you and me now.."

She didn't say anything else and me either. I let her bath robe fall on the floor and seeing her naked it's something that I won't get tired ever..

We were naked on our bed. Me on top of her.. Kissing her in places I knew she liked. I knew she would turned on. My clit and wetness touching her body and I wanted for her to see what she did to me. How she made me feel. Every time with Spencer were special. This time though it was more special than others..

I had her one breast inside my mouth, sucking it while my other was massaging her other one. I heard her moan under my touches and kisses..

"Assshhh.."

I was where she wanted me. Where I imagined myself going for so long. My tongue was playing with her clit and both of my hands were on her breasts doing the same thing that were doing minutes ago..

"Baby.. I can't take it anymore.. I want you inside me.."

I never left her clit. Two of my fingers were inside of her. She was so wet and so tight.. I could feel her inside walls spasm and I knew she wouldn't last.. My tongue was still playing her with clit and now I had a third finger thrusting her inside out. She followed my moves with her hips and I could feel it. She was ready to come..

"Come for me baby.."

"Ash.. baby.. Oh, Gosh.. Ahh.. ASHH… GOD"

I had my fingers still inside of her moving slowly but keeping a steady rhythm. I licked her folds feeling her spasm again. What can I say? I gave my woman two beautiful orgasms and I would do it again and again.

"Oh, my God baby.. You felt.. amazing.. I missed you inside me"

"Baby.. I missed you too. And you were amazing"

"Me?? Ash.. you were amazing.. And now it's my turn.. Hope you are ready for me.."

"I am always ready for you baby.. Haven't you learned it by now?"

* * *

**TBC**

**Well.. I guess it was ok? Tell me what you think.. It was too long that these two were "together". Hope you liked it..**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**xx**


	33. Chapter 33

**Wednesday! What they say about Wednesday? Its two days before Friday? But anyway.. whatever they say, Friday is coming! But.. I am lucky because tomorrow it's my last day at work for this week!! So it means that I'll have my Friday free!! Enjoy the new chapter..**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 33**

**Spencer's POV**

"Oh, my God baby.. You felt.. amazing.. I missed you inside me"

"Baby.. I missed you too. And you were amazing"

"Me?? Ash.. you were amazing.. And now it's my turn.. Hope you are ready for me.."

"I am always ready for you baby.. Haven't you learned it by now?"

I was on top of her now and had her beneath ne. I know she loves to be in control but now she knew she was mine. I was afraid to be true. After all with everything I was afraid to touch her. I was afraid that I would hurt her. But this night meant to be special, sensual with no rush or hard in any way. I wanted to explore her body once again. And she felt amazing..

My hair falling on her naked torso. I had her hands pulled back and held them with mine. She was mine and I was hers. I left my wet kisses behind her ear whispering where I would go after.. I heard her moan beneath me and I knew she needed me. But not so fast.. She had me waiting and now it was my turn..

I was on her neck kissing, and sucking her. Tomorrow she will have a big hickey but I don't care. I was marking her as she marked me with her touches. With one of my hands I had hers back of her head and with the other one I was massaging her breast. I bend so I could take it in my mouth, sucking her nipple which was already hard and she send electric volts down to my centre.

"Spe-nce.. Please.."

"Please what baby?"

"You know.. what.. mmmm"

"I want you to tell me.."

"I want you to fuck me Spence.. I want to feel you inside me.. Pleasee.."

Having Ashley beneath me, naked and asking me something that I was so ready to do.. Well.. what can I say.. I complied with her wishes..

I left her breasts and I was down on her centre. I could feel her arousal, her warmth. She was so ready and turned on for me. I wanted nothing more than to touch her. I circled her clit with my fingers while looking her in her eyes. She had them close and that meant that she liked what I did to her. I took her clit on my mouth sucking it and licking it and I could hear her say something that I couldn't make sense.. Maybe a 'Fuck' or 'Yeah'. Yes, she liked it..

After what I thought was enough teasing for my girl I took her out of her misery and inserted her with two of my fingers. It was then when I saw her opening her eyes and looking at me.. I wanted to see her when I was making love to her. I wanted to have that instant connection.. When not only you feel the other but you see through its soul.

My rhythm was steady. I was thrusting her with two of my fingers and then I put another one inside because I knew she wanted hard. That was my baby.. She was so tight and I so missed this.. I so not letting her again for so long. I want to warship her body every day, every night. I could feel she was ready to come and not only by her walls tighten over my fingers but I could see it in her eyes. They were shinning..

"Spe-nce.. Ahh.. baby.."

"Come for me baby.. I want you to come all over my hand"

"SPENCE.. FUCK.. mmm"

When you know you made your other half happy after sex? After you heard your name several times during sex and screaming your name while coming.. I guess I made her happy..

"I so missed this.."

"Me too Ash.. are you ok?"

"I'm fine baby. Better than fine.."

"Are you sure? You don't hurt or anything? Are you feeling dizzy?"

"You are cute when you are worried. I am fine. Come here"

She took me in her arms and I rested my head over her naked torso. I could feel her heart beat and it was strong.. And I knew it was beating for me. As my heart was beating only for her..

The rest of the night found us in bed, no sleeping at all. We made love all night till the sun rose.

"I don't want to get up. I want to stay here laying with you.."

"Stay here.. I'll be back.."

"Where are you going?"

She didn't answer. Instantly she stood naked and wore her robe and stepped out of the room. I missed her already.. It felt cold without her..

After 20 minutes she was back to our room with a tray full of goodies..

"What have you done?"

"Well.. what it looks like? I am serving breakfast in bed to my beautiful queen.."

She was so sweet. Last night she had everything prepared. And now breakfast in bed? It is so my Ashley..

"Well.. we have orange juice, coffee, french toasts and bagels. I didn't try on pancakes of course.."

"This is perfect.. Now come sit with me so we can have this lovely breakfast.."

We ate what Ashley made for us and headed for shower.. Of course nothing could stop my lovely fiancée for coming with me although I told her that if she would come we would find each other pressing on the wall.. Of course I didn't say anything else because we were already naked in bathroom and doing each other.. on the wall.. Nice waking up like that. Don't you think..?

We made ourselves presentable and headed down. Glen had called to tell us that he was bringing Christine back.. I so waited to see my little angel. I haven't see her from the day before yesterday..

"Mommy, momma?" she run inside running into our arms. We both kissed her and took her in our arms each..

"Baby girl? Did you have fun with uncle Glen?"

"Yes, mommy. Uncle Glen gave me ice-cweam"

"I hope not too much" I said and looked Glen to see if he gave her more that he should

"Hey, don't look at me. She did that pout you do. I couldn't resist on that.."

"I hear you Glen.. I so know what you mean. I have two blonds to handle here" my Ashley said giving her best smile. I missed her smile. Actually I missed everything on her..

"Ash.."

"What? It is true.. You know that I would do everything you told me seeing that cute little pout of yours.."

"I guess… I taught you good baby girl.."

"Yes, you did mommy.."

Christine left us to go paint on her favourite spot in the living room. Glen , Ashley and I were at the kitchen now.

"So how it was yesterday for you my girls?" Ashley and eye looked each other and we said unison..

"Perfect"

"That good eh?"

"Yes.. Thank you Glen for everything."

"Hey, I love my niece and it was time for you to be alone for a while. Whenever you want that again you know I am here.. And now excuse me because someone didn't have awesome sex yesterday and have to go to work also.."

"Mommy? What is sex?" I gave my best bad look at Glen saying him 'what the fuck Glen?"

"Ehm.. baby.." what am I saying to a three year old? I so don't want to say about the bees. That is so stupid.. When she is older I am sure Ash and I will tell her exactly how kids are born.. "Ehm.. it's when two people love each other very very much"

"Aww.. like you and momma?" I wish you could see me now. I am blushed and it doesn't help that Ashley laughs and Glen does the same..

"Ehm.. yeah.. Like me and momma"

"Good.." that was it. She came like a storm and left like a tornado.

"Glen.. I am so going to kill you.."

"Hey, hey.. I am your nanny. Don't kill the nanny."

"You are so lucky I am not killing you because I need you"

He came and kissed me on my chick saying his goodbye and 'I love you too sis'. I guess it was my girls and I again.

**

It was two uneventful months.. Ashley and I were in our best. We were planning for our wedding. We decided for the month. We both said that it would be best for a Christmas wedding. I know that in California never snows and you don't know if it's Christmas or anything but the magic is already there. You don't need to have snow for the perfect Christmases'. Just the people you love.. So I couldn't wait to marry Ashley and be Mrs Ashley Davies.. I was dreaming for this I don't know for how long..

"So I guess we are ready?"

"Not quite.. We have to see what we are going to wear."

"Ok.. I know.. You are going to wear a white dress and you will be the most beautiful girl"

"And what about you?"

"Well.. it's a surprise.. You'll see me when you will be walking in the altar"

"What surprise?"

"Well.. maybe I'll wear a dress maybe I won't. Guess we will find out"

"Oh, come on Ash.."

"No no. You are not going to break me.."

"Even if I kiss you here?" and I kissed her on her collarbone

"Mmm.. nooo.."

"Not even here?" and I kissed her behind her ear taking her ear lobe in my mouth and biting it..

"Ehmm…"

"Well?"

"Ehmm.. nooo.. sorry.."

"I lost my touch.."

"No baby.. believe me you still got it. And it's getting very difficult for me to resist you"

"Ok, I think?"

"Spence? Ehm.. I want to ask you something that I was thinking for a long time now.."

"What is it baby?"

"Well.. I was thinking.." before she could continue my phone rang and got up..

"Hello?"

"Hello to you Spencer.. Nice hearing you again"

My jaw drop. I haven't heard that voice for a long time now. I thought I was already forgetting that voice.. I looked Ashley and she saw that I was surprised and what I would tell her?

* * *

**TBC**

**Well.. what can I say?? I guess we all going to find tomorrow? Yes.. Don't hate me..**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**xx**


	34. Chapter 34

**Well let's see who the mystery person is…**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 34**

I wanted to tell Spencer for so long. I wanted to tell her that I did some search and I wanted to be Christine's legal guardian. I wanted to adopt her. Soon I would marry Spencer and we were all going to be family. Christine already called me momma and she was my daughter. I knew that Spencer wouldn't mind but I wanted to ask her. Before I could ask her if she was ok though her phone rang and I stopped.

After she answered the phone I couldn't read her expression. All I could read was surprise and that maybe on the other line was someone she didn't expect to be. She started passing all over the living room. I didn't know what the other person said but all I could hear and obviously see was Spencer's frustration.

"What do you want?"

"_Why being so feisty Spencer?"_

"Why you are calling after so long?"

"_I wanted to speak with my daughter of course"_

"Now you remembered her? Where were you all this long?" what is she talking about? And who this other person is?

"_I saw you moved on with your life"_

"What do you care?"

"_You did good though. Ashley Davies. I bet you are with her f__or her money"_

"Don't you dare.. She is better person than you'll ever be." I am serious now. I am starting to worry. She looks angry..

"_Well well.. Look at __you Spencer.. Change of character.."_

"Did you finish?"

"_No. Where is Christine?"_

"At school"

"_Are you happy with yourself? Being with a woman you think it's better for our kid?"_

"You mean MY kid. You never wanted her" oh, my God. It is him. It is Bob.

"_Well I think that these things need two people involved"_

"Why you called?"

"_Well __from where I see it, well I don't want my daughter to be raised by two lesbians"_

"WHAT? Are you fucked up?"

"_I'll come and get her home. She doesn't need to be in this kind of environment"_

Spencer didn't say anything else. She gave me a look and I think I knew. Although I didn't know what he said to her I knew he talked about Christine. And when it comes to children nothing can be good.

I stand up and went to her side. She was still holding the phone and I could see tears in her eyes. What did he say to her that made her so sad. I will kick his fucking ass..

"Baby? Are you ok?"

"Oh, Ash.." she hugged me really tight and I did the same because I wanted to hold her. To make her feel safer.

"Baby was it Bob?"

"How.."

"I guess after you said it was your kid and that he never wanted her"

"Ash..(sniff) he (sniff) want to take her (sniff) away from us"

"WHAT? Are you kidding me?"

"No, he said that he doesn't want his daughter to be raised by two lesbians"

"Where does he live? Because if he ever thinks of coming here and take Christine I will kill him.." Spencer looked at me to see if I was serious or not. I meant it. Whoever touch a hair from my blonds I would so kill them.

"Ash.."

"I mean it. He won't take her baby. Don't worry. I won't leave him to step his foot here."

"What are we going to do Ash? What if he succeeds? What if he takes our daughter from us?"

"I'll think of something. Now.. come here. Sit with me. We will find something. Ok?"

I took her in my arms caressing her arm. She was so scared of losing Christine and I was too. I had to think of something. Really fast. I had some connections and I could find where he lived. I guess Bob and I will have a little talk.

I took Spencer upstairs to rest after all her sobbing. Christine wasn't home yet and now that I was alone I had to make some phone calls. It's a good thing if you are famous. Because I had the best bodyguards. One of them was a good friend of mine and he was my favorite.

"Michael?"

"Ms Davies.. How are you?"

"I'm fine Michael. I want your help with something"

"Of course Ms Davies. What can I do for you?"

"I want you to find someone for me. I want you to track him down and tell me where he lives"

"Is he a stalker or anything? Because if he is I will take him down.."

"He is not a stalker but your offer is tempting. No. I don't want you to take him down. Only to find him"

"Ok, Ms Davies. What is his name?"

"Bob Mc Allen. He was Spencer's ex husband"

"Did he do anything to Ms Spencer?"

"No Michael. Could you please find him?"

"Ok. When I have something I will call you back"

"Thanks Michael. And don't say anything to anyone. Only you and me know"

"My mouth is sealed."

"I'll be waiting"

Now all I could do was waiting. Michael is the best I have. And I know that in less than 24 hours I'll know where the fucker lives. If you are wondering if I am going to kill him.. Well I don't know.. It depends.. If he hit a nerve..

It was 3pm and it was time for Christine to be home. Spencer didn't cook anything because of the day we had so it was my mother duty to feed my child and take care my family for once. Macaroni and Cheese it was an easy food and Christine's favorite.

"Hey, momma"

"Hey princess. How was your day?"

"Same.."

"Nothing amazing?"

"Nothing. We paint."

"Yes? What did you paint?"

"My family" she bed down to open her sack and hand me her picture. It was the three of is at the beach. My girl paints so nice for her age. I can't lose Christine because she has an asshole for a father. I need Michael to call me soon..

"Whewe is mommy?"

"She is sleeping baby. She was tired. Now go wash your hands so we can eat"

We both sat at the table eating our Macaroni. I couldn't take my eyes of her. She is our angel. I don't know if Spencer lose her what would happen. I remember the day she found out that she was kidnapped. She closed herself from everyone and I so won't let her do that again. Not to me and not even to her.

Me and Christine were in the living room. We were watching SpongBob the Squarepant. What? It's my favorite. I didn't know that Spencer was up but I felt her touch and kiss on my head and then the same to Christine.

"Hey baby.."

"Mommy.. how awe you?"

"I'm fine baby. Did you eat?"

"Yes, mommy and I ate macawoni and cheese"

"I see. Sorry I couldn't be here with you my beautiful girls"

"It's alright Spence. Are you feeling better?"

"I don't know Ash.."

I left the couch I was occupying with Christine and took Spencer inside the kitchen. I had to tell her what I was going to do because I promised her I wouldn't keep anything from her ever again.

"Baby? Listen. I called Michael to search where Bob lives"

"What? Why?"

"I'll have a chat with him"

"Ash, please no. Please don't do anything you will sorry"

"I won't do anything. Ok? I'll just go and talk with him"

"Ash.."

"Listen to me. Everything is going to be ok. Do you trust me?"

"With my life."

"Then trust me with this. I won't let him take Christine"

"Ash.. before he called.. what did you want to tell me..?"

"Ehm.. maybe it's not the right time.."

"Ash.. tell me. You sounded serious."

"Ehm.. I wanted to ask you if you would have a problem with me adopting Christine" I saw her cry again. I so didn't want to make her cry. If she doesn't want it it's ok. I would still feel her as a daughter.

"Baby.. I am so in love with you"

"Ehm.. I love you too Spence"

"Do you know why I cried?"

"Why?"

"Because you are perfect. You are perfect for me. And I wouldn't want anyone else as a parent for Christine. She is your daughter as much she is mine. And I believe she already calls you momma."

"Oh, Spence. You made me really happy. I just wanted to ask you if it was ok with you"

"Of course it is ok."

I kissed her lips without deepening the kiss. I just wanted to feel her. I wanted for her to feel how much I love her. We held each other for a while when my phone rang. I hoped it was Michael to give me an answer.

"hello?"

"Ms Davies? It is Michael"

"hey. Did you find anything?"

"Yes. I found where he lives. I searched a little more and found interesting things about him."

"Yes? Interesting. What did you find?"

"Well he seems to owe a lot of money. He has lost all his money in cards and horses"

"very good Michael. Thank you so much"

Well I didn't expect that. Now it is easier for me to get rid of him. Not in that way.

"Who was it Ash?"

"Michael. He found him. And he told me interesting things about_ Bob"_

"What are you going to do?"

"What I told you before. I am taking a flight tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?"

"Yes. He doesn't live here. Probably he moved after you took a divorce."

"Ash.. please promise me you won't do anything. And please be careful. I didn't like his voice. He sounded.. different than before"

"Don't worry. I can take care of myself. Now come and sit with our daughter"

**

I was here. Outside his door. Waiting to see his face. What he looked like. I guess we will have fun.

"YES" he opened the door rather violently. He was 26, same age as Spencer but he looked like he was 36. He had blond hair, green eyes and a beard. He didn't seem he showered for some time. Eww. "WHAT"

"Hello Bob"

"How do you.. Oh.. you are her? Ashley Davies the magnificent"

"What an honor. You heard of me."

"What can I say? Like reading about you and my wife"

"Ex-wife buddy. Ex"

"Why you are here?"

"Can I come in?" he opened the door for me to step inside. It was a nice house. Definitely needs a woman's touch.

"Well.. I ask again. What are you doing here?"

"Came to talk to you"

"We have nothing to talk about. I will come and get my daughter back. I won't let her stay with you sinners"

"Well.. if I was you I would be more careful to how I use my words"

"Are you threatening me?"

"Maybe."

"You came here and you will leave with empty hands"

"Well that is what you think."

"Do you think I am afraid of you?"

"Well.. lets see.. I learned something bad for you. It seems you owe some people money. And maybe these people if they find you they are going to kill you.."

"How.. how.."

"It doesn't matter how. So my proposal it's simple. Either you leave Spencer and Christine alone or else I'll send these called people to come after you. And believe me you so don't want that. And if you find your way to escape from them I will find you and have my people finish the job. Am I clear?"

"You are bluffing."

"Try me and you will find out. Oh.. and something else. You should sign these papers"

"What is this?"

"Well this papers saying that you deny your daughter and stop being her father"

"I could never sign these papers."

"Come on.. You are talking with me. I know you never wanted Christine. So if you know what is best for you and your daughter you know what you have to do" he seemed in deep thinking. At first I was thinking of paying him to stay away from us but then I thought if I paid him once he would come back again. But what Michael said it was easier and it helped me a lot with my decision. I saw him signing the papers. I guess my job here was finished. And without blood. That's new..

"Well Bob. Nice doing job with you. Now remember. If I ever catch you near my family you are dead meat. I hope I made myself clear. Goodbye.."

I left his house and I let a sound of relief stepping my foot outside. While being with him I though my heart would break in million pieces. I had to think of Spencer and Christine to be strong and to stand up to him.. And I did it. But I meant it. If I ever saw him again near us I would do what I told him..

I wanted to call Spencer. To hear her voice. To feel safe and calm.

"Ash? Are you ok?"

"hey baby"

"What did happen? Did you kill him?"

"Spence.."

"I mean it Ash. Did you?"

"No. I could never kill someone. But.. I threaten him.."

"WHAT?"

"Don't worry. Everything is good. He won't bother us ever again. If he knows what is best for him"

"Will you tell me once you come home?"

"I will tell you everything. I missed you"

"I missed you too. When are you coming back?"

"I'll take the flight of 3.30. By 6 I'll be home. Ok? Love you"

"Love you too baby."

* * *

**TBC**

**Well.. I answered who that person was.. Did anyone thought about him or we did forget he ever existed? Hope you liked it..**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**xx**


	35. Chapter 35

**Hey guys.. Sorry I couldn't update yesterday but it's Easter and we have a lot of tradition and of course I got out with friends! But now before I leave again I told to myself that I should write.. Have fun whatever you do..**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 35**

**Spencer's POV**

When he called me I thought my world would crush. Hearing his voice after so long I knew it wasn't for good. And I didn't know how to say that to Ashley. She knew that for me, eventually, he was a sperm donor and nothing else. My world was Ashley and Christine.

Now I am here waiting for her to come home. I was afraid that she might have killed him. Actually I was sure that she was going to kill him. She was the protector of the family. I learned that on the hard way. When I heard her voice that she was coming back and everything was fine I felt better. Knowing that my girl wouldn't go to jail was something.

"Honey.. I am home.."

"Ash…" she was back. One piece.. Thank God.. I got up from the couch to run and hug her so tight.

"Hey.. nice seeing you too"

"Why you didn't call me so I could come and get you?"

"Michael brought me home. It was nothing. Now.. where is Christine?"

"At a friend's house."

"What friend?"

"Miranda. You know the girl."

"Hmm no.. That name doesn't remind me of something.."

"Come on Ash.. Is the little girl with the red hair and the freckles?"

"Ohh.. yes.. Pippi Longstocking.."

"Why you keep calling her like that?"

"Because she looks like her"

"Ok… now.. you have to answer me some questions."

"Can I have a shower first? I promise I will tell you everything"

"Ok."

Ashley came down after half an hour with only her robe. Right now all I could think was 'Spencer take your mind out of the gutter.' But come on. If she was naked underneath how was I suppose to keep my mind and my hands off her?

"Spence?"

"Eh?"

"Are you ok? I think you are red"

"I guess it's hot?"

"I guess, you think I am hot?"

"Something like that"

"Well come sit with me baby"

Sit with her? Well what about I take her and we sit somewhere else? She could tell me later about fucked up Bob.. Noooo… Nooo..

"Spence? What are you thinking?"

"Nothing. Well what did happen?"

"Well all I can say is.. What on earth did you find in that guy? Well he is not bad looking but come on. I am sure you could do better"

"Ok. Now you can continue what you were saying"

"Ok. He saw me, he knew who I was and he tried to tell me that he would take Christine from us. I told him 'No so fast buddy. Under my dead body'. And I may threaten him"

"What?"

"Well I told you what Michael told me. I told him that if he ever comes near you or Christine they will find him in a ditch."

"Ash.. you shouldn't.."

"Spence.. Whoever threatens my family he gets what he deserves. And I mean it. I am sure he will not try anything. And I did something else." She stood up and went to her bag. She came back to our couch and handed me some papers

"What is that?"

"Read" what I read left me with my mouth open. Bob had signed that he had renounced the right of being Christine's father. And I saw that he already signed it. I was .. speechless..

"What? How?"

"Well I couldn't adopt Christine if she already had her father. I have your assent but clearly I could never adopt her without Bob's assent. So once he was never a real father to her I had him sign these papers. Now I can adopt Christine and we can be a real family."

"We are a real family"

"Yes, I know but I wanted everything to be legal. Just to be sure"

"When you became a grown up?"

"Well that hurt.. But seriously.. After we almost broke up I saw things in other perspective. In order to become a wife and a mother I should grow up. Don't you like me?" she said with her familiar grin and I would laugh because I love her but I just kissed her. I kissed her and I let her only to breathe.

"I guess I got my answer. What time does Christine come back?"

"Why? What do you have in mind?"

"Well I have a lot of things in mind.."

"Care to tell me?"

She stood up and took my hand in hers. Of course I knew what she had in mind because we think the same. I was wondering if she was naked beneath her robe. And when we got to our bedroom I found out. Yes she was naked and she provoked me all this time and yes we had amazing sex. I guess when I have some time alone with my soon to be wife I have to make the best of it..

**

"Spence?? Are you ready? Did you pack everything?"

"For the millionth time Ash.. Yes. We are ready.. I have some last thing of Christine's but we are ready"

It was a week after the incident with Bob and we were finally moving. We found the perfect beach house. It was as we imagined it to be. Do you remember the house Kelly from Beverly Hills had? Well something like that but ours was way bigger and way more expensive. Ashley didn't care for the cost. If we liked it she would buy it. And we liked it. Both three of us. Christine was so happy that she could play on the beach and she could swim whenever she wanted. Although the house was like 100 meters away from the sea we had a little pool outside too. Just pereftect. I already imagined of Ash and I sitting in our armchairs outside watching Christine and drinking our coffees. I could see us growing up and be together always. I guess dreams come true and mine came true.

"Well.. how you feel my girls?"

"Momma, I love it. It's pewfect. Can I go swim?"

"Well.. I don't know. What mommy says?"

"Mommy, mommy, please.. pleeeassse"

"Well.. I guess we could all go for swimming. What do you say?"

"Yes.. me fiwst. Me fiwst."

Christine run to her bedroom to find her swimsuit as we did the same. Of course Ashley had to put her mini bikini that left nothing to imagination. She was perfect in every fucking way.

"Like what you see?"

"Oh, yes. Like you don't know.."

"Well I would love to know baby. What do you think of my bikini Spence?" she said and she just came near me touching my top.

"Ehm.. i.. love it.."

"Good answer baby.." she kissed me and she trailed my bottom lip with her tongue asking for entrance which it was granted the moment she kissed me. Before we deepen the kiss Christine was in our door..

"Mommy, momma.. Come on. You kiss aftew.. Come on.." she left immediately and Ashley and I looked each other straight in each others eyes.

"Well, your daughter waits for us to come down"

"Well, your daughter is like her mother. Feisty and she gets what she wants" I told Ashley touching our foreheads together..

"What can I say? I am a hot, clever, sexy, momma"

"Yes, you are baby. Now come on. We can continue this talk once we put Christine in bed"

"Yes my queen. Always at your service"

The water was amazing. The weather was still warm. We played at the sea and then we sat there just watching Christine playing with her beach toys. She wanted to bury Ashley but Ashley was not so fond with the idea. She thought sand going to her private places and she didn't like it at all. Christine tried to persuade her. Nothing. And then they both looked at me..

"Baby girl.. what if we bury mommy? What do you think?"

"Yes, yes, yes."

"Hey hey hey. Why? What did I do to you? Don't I feed you both? Don't I clean the house? Don't I love you so much?"

"We love you too Spence but it should be fun. Baby girl take your shovel. We have to dig a big hole for mommy"

Well how I could resist on those two? And it was fun. We stayed at the beach till the sun set. Christine was so tired. When we got home I had to take her in shower while she was asleep. We put her in bed and we went for our shower as well..

"Baby? Do you want to share?"

"Ashh…"

"Come on. Don't you have an environmental spirit? We can save water.."

"Tell me now that you are an ecologist?"

"Well.. what can I say? I am a hot, sexy, clever, momma ecologist"

"Cute.."

"Now.. I am going inside.. If you want to share a shower with me the door is always open for you.." she said and she took of her top of her bikini while looking at me straight in my eyes. She turned her back, took her bottom off and stepped inside the bathroom.. I didn't want 5 seconds. In four I was inside with her..

"You came.."

"Well.. I had to think of earth.."

She turned her face and now she looked at me face to face. Breast to breast. Water falling from her eyes and wet. Wet in both ways. Because obviously, one because of the water and two because my hand was already in her centre. And she was so fucking wet.

"You are so wet baby.."

"That what you always do to me Spence. Always.."

I was kissing her and my hand never leaving her centre. I was playing with her clit circling it. She moaned inside my mouth. A sound that I always love to hear. I put one finger inside of her just to feel her. I was teasing her and I knew she wanted for me to finish what I was doing..

"Spence.. please.. baby.. I want you.."

"I want you too baby.. So much.." I said between kisses..

I was inside of her thrusting her with two of my fingers and my thumb rubbing her clit. Her walls tighten my fingers and I knew that soon or later she could have her climax.

"Spence.. yes.. I am gonna come baby.. AHH.. SPENCE.. God.."

I had my fingers still inside of her having a slow rhythm. I bed down to my knees and I took a good taste of her folds. I licked her and her taste it was amazing. I could feel her spasm and I knew that she could have another orgasm because now I was playing with her clit..

"Fuck Spence.. Just FUCK.."

"mmmm.. nice.."

"Oh, my God.. It was.. just fuck.."

"Yes it was baby.." I stood up again and kissed her. It was a sensual kiss but lustful with passion and love. All in one deep kiss..

When we stepped out from the bathroom we were still naked and it was Ashley's turn. She made love to me and I think I forgot my name after this. Yes we had sex a lot. But I guess in this house it was like our senses were more aware. It was different. It was a first start in everything. And we were starting our new life. Here, together..

* * *

**TBC**

**Well.. I suppose once I didn't update yesterday I should write something that would keep you reading.. Hope you liked..**

**Reviews are always welcome**

**xx**


	36. Chapter 36

**Hey guys! Did you rest this weekend? Did you do something amazing, incredible or you just rest? Well I just got back after being out all day!! Couldn't stay away for long.. Hope you like the new chapter..**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 36**

Anxious? Nervous? Happy? Nervous? Marrying? Oh, my God I am marrying Spencer.

"Could you please relax a little? Oh, my God Ash."

"Kyla.. please.. just shut the fuck up"

"Why you always speak to me like that? Really I don't know. Is it because our father cheated your mother? It wasn't my fault you know. I didn't cheated with him.."

"KYLA.. please.. could you please help me? I think that I am going to throw up"

"Ok. Do you want a paper bag or something to breathe? You seem.. I don't know.. pale?"

"Yes.. a bag.. bring it to me.. now.." I said between breaths.

It was December. And the day that I would finally marry my love. We found the place which was what else? The beach. It was a beach wedding. And what the perfect wedding near to our house? We even found a priest to perform the wedding here. We wanted something simple and yet elegant.

We made a wood pass from our house to the altar so we could walk without walking on sand. White chairs to the right and to the left. We didn't invite many people. I believe that when you want to marry you should have beside you the people you love or the ones they are your friends. Also if you have a family that loves you would be perfect. But having a dead father and a bitch for a mother I guess this part of my family wouldn't be here. But I am lucky I have Kyla. And Aiden. They were the most important persons I wanted here with me. From Spencer's side, Glen of course and Spencer's dad, Mr. Carlin. Nice man. Not as her mother. Bitch. Friends from Spencer's hospital and friends from the label for me. Not that I had many.

We had white roses all over and pedals down to the wooden path to the altar. Of course I made my mind of what I would wear and I was curious of what Spencer would wear. Very curious. And so did she. Kyla told me several times that Spencer asked her what I bought. She even threaten her. But my sister stood as a rock because she knew that if she revealed what I would wear she knew she would be dead. So I guess my threat was better..

A week before I adopted Christine and now she is legally my daughter. And I am so happy. Everything seems to go to the right place. One thing left and that is my last gig in California. After what happened with everything we postponed the gig. After this I quit and I'll make sure my exit is as awesome as my entrance. At least now I will have my loving wife with me. Seeing me singing only for her and our daughter.

"Here.. Now breathe"

"I feel.. better.."

"Can I ask you something?"

"Yes?"

"Why are you feeling anxious? Hello… you are marrying the one you love. Spencer.. The woman of your dreams, of your life.."

"I know.. I just.. don't know. I couldn't wait to marry her and now I am marrying her."

"Eh? What?"

"Come.. We should get to the altar. Do you have the ring?"

"Yes.. here.."

"Are you ready?"

"Are you ready Ash? You won't faint or something?"

"Jesus.. you are talking too much"

"You know you love me.."

"I do.. Now come.. I can't wait to see my woman"

Our guests were already there waiting for us. Glen was the best man for Spencer as Kyla was mine. Mr. Carlin would be the one who would give Spencer. Aiden told me if I would like to be given by him and I told him "Are you kidding? I am not the bride dude.." he just laughed and I just did the same. To be true I wanted to be given by someone. And that someone was my father. I guess he could see me from above..

I sensed her. I knew she was coming to me because I felt my heart beat harder and faster. Kyla was talking to me and then I saw her.. We looked each other and she was the prettiest girl on the world. She was wearing a simple white dress. Her hair was straightened and down with a coronal on her head. She was an angel. My angel. From the one side she had Mr. Carlin who had a smile in his face. I loved this man because he never criticized us. When he learned about us he stood for both of us. I wished her mother wasn't hard with Spencer. I wished she could be here to see her beautiful daughter. But it's her lost. And from the other side she had a little blond one holding her hand. My girls..

Mr. Carlin gave Spencer to me and said "Take care of my little girl. Will you?" and of course I couldn't say anything that 'yes'

"Hey"

"Hey"

"You are beautiful"

"Nice outfit" she said looking at me. Well what did I chose? Something I would feel good. White pants with black hills. White jacket with a deep V-cut and black lace bra.. I thought of wearing a vest but it was my wedding and I wanted to be less sexy?

"Thanks?" she smiled at me and I was already feeling jumpy inside..

The priest said what he had to say. I didn't listen anyway. I was just waiting to put the ring on Spencer's finger..

It was the time we were saying our vows. I have to say that I stayed up all night to figure out what I would tell. Even if I can write songs I didn't know how to tell my wife that I should love her forever.. I took my card from my pocket and looked at it. I guess I didn't need to read.. So I just threw it..

"Guess I won't need that.. Spence.. I love you. And I will love you till my heart stops. You and our daughter are my everything and I will try my best to be the best wife and mother. I love you baby"

"Can I have the ring please?"

Kyla stepped front giving me the ring I bought for Spencer. It was a ring with pink sapphires and round brilliant diamonds in platinum. The perfect ring for my perfect wife..

Now it was Spencer's turn to say her vows and I couldn't wait for the priest to say 'Now you can kiss your bride'

"Ash.. I never thought that I would meet the love of my life. I always believed that there was someone out there for me. Somewhere I lost my way but you were there to lighten my life. You are my soul. I love you baby"

"May I have the ring please?"

Glen was the one who stepped front this time giving Spencer the exact same ring I just put on her finger. Mine had blue sapphires. At first I thought the blue one for Spencer but then pink wasn't my color. So I chose blue for me because then I could have Spencer with me all the time. I would look my wedding ring and I would see her perfect blue sapphire eyes..

"Now I pronounce you wife and wife. You can kiss your wife Ashley"

"I thought you would never finish"

I kissed Spencer tenderly sealing our love, our new life. It was our first kiss as a married couple. And it was better than every kiss we had..

"Hello, wife"

"Hello to you too my wife"

"It sounds good eh?"

"Very good" she said and we kissed again until we were interrupted by our family and the photographer..

"Girls.. it's time for some photos. You can kiss later.." That was Glen in case you didn't understand. Well what can I say? I forgive him. He will look after my daughter after we leave for our honey moon..

We took photos of just me and Spencer, Spencer with her family, me with mine and all together. A perfect day.. My perfect day..

After the wedding we told everyone to come inside the house. I brought a catering. Spencer wanted to cook but of course the most sane one, aka me, said that we should have the catering. We would choose what we would like to serve and we wouldn't get dirty..

We partied till late. We put Christine in bed really early because my girl was tired with everything. But she was happy that her moms were now married. She didn't forget to mention that before she said goodnight to us..

At 4am everyone was gone and Spencer and I were alone.

"Baby.. I am tired.."

"I know sweetheart.. Me too.. Do you want me to give you a massage?"

"Ash.. don't temp me.."

"What? I didn't do anything.."

"Ash.. if you put your hands on me right now baby I will want you to do more to me and I will be so turned on and I really believe that I will sleep on you because I am that tired and that wasted.."

"Ok, hands off then.. What if I take you in my arms and take you to our bedroom?"

"Hmmm… yeesss wiffy. Pleeaase"

"Come on baby.. I guess you won't drink for a month"

"Say for a year.."

I took her in my arms and we got to our bedroom. We were both so tired. I undressed her and I did the same to me. We were naked under the covers. I didn't even think of touching her because in a moment I was already in the hands of Morpheus..

Next morning we were awake from a little blond jumping on our bed..

"Mommy, momma wake up wake up wake up"

"Princess what are you doing up so early?"

"Momma, it is late"

I opened my eyes so I could see what hour it was. It was clearly late because the watch said 3pm.

"Spence.. baby.. wake up. It is late"

"Five more minutes.. I promise I get up"

"Mommy, wake up.. wake up"

Spencer was still in her dreaming world and I am sure when she would wake up she would have a very bad hangover. I leaned to her naked back to kiss her and to wake her up of course.

"Mmmm.."

"Spence.. wake up baby.." I continued kissing her but I guess she was playing with me..

"Whyy?? I like what you are doing.."

"Baby, wake up. Christine is already awaken.. She is downstairs.. Now come on.. Get up.. We should go out and eat.."

"What if I want to eat you?"

"Well that could be arranged. Late at night.. Now get up. I am going to have a shower"

"I am coming.."

"Ah.. now you are awake.."

"What can I say..?"

"Come on silly"

We did share a shower but we didn't do hot steamy sex. I wouldn't want a jumpy Christine be all jumpy inside our bathroom seeing her mothers do each other. What can I say? I have issues. I don't want to traumatize my child..

When we finished we got down to the living room. Christine was watching cartoons network and when she realized we were down she forgot about everything and run to our arms..

"Mommy.. you wake up"

"Yes, baby girl"

"What do you say of us going out and eat? Eh?"

"YES.."

"Well I have one vote. What do you say my beautiful wife?"

"Well.. I would never say no to my beautiful wife."

"Ok.. come on girls. Let's go.."

I never imagined that I would have a family of my own. And it was a dream I started to believe when I met Spencer. Now all I could think of is my family..

* * *

**TBC**

**Wedding chapter. Hoped you liked it. To be totally true I don't like so much of the weddings. So maybe I didn't give so much of a credit but I tried my best.. Hope you liked what you read..**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**xx**


	37. Chapter 37

**Hey guys.. How was your Monday? Well being in Europe it means that Monday almost passed. Didn't have to go to work.. so yay!! The weather is incredible.. sun and heat. Coffee near the sea!! Just perfect!!!  
**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 37**

"Spence?? Have you seen my black hills?"

"Where you left them last time?"

"Here"

"Where exactly is here?"

"Behind the door?"

"Are you asking me? Ash.. you never remember where you put your things"

"It's not true"

"They were in the bathroom and now they are back to their box."

"That's why I married you. You are the best"

"Aha.. that's why eh? Not because you love me and you want to spend your life with me?"

"That also. I love you baby. You know that"

"Even if you are forgetful I love you too"

That is how it always goes. I don't remember where I put my things and Spencer always knows where to find them. She is that good. Now we are married for a week. A week. I can't believe it. I am married to this wonderful woman. Sometimes I think that everything is a lie. That I will wake up and she will not be next to me.

We postponed our honey moon for the last gig I had to give. I was all day rehearsing my songs. They all knew by now that this was my last concert. I was looking for a place to open my new label. It would need time and patience but it was worth it.

The concert was this Saturday. So every morning till late at night I was either on the studio or rehearsing or finding me my new place. The only time I could see Spencer was early in the morning and late at the night. If she wasn't working. But that wouldn't keep me for seeing her. I would go there and greet her with flowers and kisses. Yes, I am a good wife.

"Baby, I have to leave. I don't know when I'll be back. There're two days left till the concert. You and Christine will come, eh?"

"Ash.. I told you. I wouldn't miss it for the world. We will be there watching you. Don't worry for tonight. I will be here waiting for you. Call me when you have time. Ok? Now go.."

I made a step forward to leave but I couldn't leave without kissing her first. It was our ritual.

I came back, placed my hands behind her back caressing it. Spencer was in her negligee because it was still morning. Too early for my preference. I was kissing her neck letting my tongue touch her pulse point sucking it a little. My hands were already inside touching her beautiful shaped breasts. If I didn't stop, if she doesn't stop me..

"Ashh.. ba-by.. mmm.. baby.. you.. we.. have.."

"Spence, I am so addicted to you.." I already had her straps down kissing her collarbone..

"Baby.. if we continue.. you.. oh my God.." I had my hand placed on her centre. Of course she was naked. She is always naked when we sleep. I know I shouldn't do that especially before I leave, especially with me being dressed and everything but I couldn't..

I was kissing her while I had my hand on her centre. She was so wet, and she was wet for me.. That turned me on even more. I bend down and took up a little her negligee. I had her where I wanted her. I trailed my kisses for her belly down to her thighs but never there..

"Ash.. oh.. my God.. I want you inside me.. stop teasing me.."

"Mmmm.. someone is feisty this morning.."

"Assh.. please.. don't make me beg.."

I was kissing her clit, circling it with my tongue. I had already inside of her two of my fingers thrusting her inside out. My tongue never leaving her clit. My fingers having a slow and a fast rhythm.. She was ready.. I knew she was ready.. Her hands were on my hair.. I loved her hands wherever they were..

"Ash.. oh.. my God.. baby.. yes.."

"I want you to come on my hand baby.. I want you.."

She did as I told her to. She came on my hands. I slowed my rhythm till I could feel she was more relaxed.. I got up on my feet, looking her beautiful face.. She looked at me and I just licked two of my fingers that were inside of her seconds ago..

"Mmmm… you taste amazing baby.." she pulled me to her kissing me. It was a wet sensual kiss..

"You are very bad you know.."

"And that is why?"

"Because you had your way with me and now I can't have you as I want.."

"Sorry?"

"Don't be sorry.. Wait till you come tonight.. You are going to pay what you did to me my sexy wife.."

"Ooouu I love promises…" she kissed me one more time and told me to leave before she had her way with me right there.. I wouldn't mind but I seriously had to go..

And because I had this little sex thing this morning with Spencer I was late.. But who cares. I don't. I had sex with my wife before I come here. Tell me who had sex like me.. Ha.. no one.. That was I thought..

The day was not easy. Not easy at all. They wanted perfect and I wanted perfect.. I wanted my last concert to be huge, awesome, something that they could remember. Also in this concert I would play two new songs I was writing for some time now. The one was for Spencer and the other for both my girls.. I didn't say anything because I wanted to be a surprise. And that was one for the reasons I wanted so much Christine and Spencer there.. I just can't wait to see Spencer when I'll sing that song only for her..

_**Saturday Ashley's last concert**_

"Did you check the sound?"

"Yes, Ashley. We did check it several times."

"What about the microphone? Did you check on mine?"

"Ashley, could you please relax? It is not your first time you know.. You have done this I don't know how many times"

"I know Jimmy. I just.. it's the first time Spencer and Christine will be here you know.. I just want everything to be perfect.." Jimmy was one of the best drummers I had. He was a nice guy and married. Very rare. He wasn't sleeping around, he didn't do drugs. Rare.. very rare..

"When is she going to be here?"

"I had a limo bring them here. They would be here five minutes ago.. What if something happened?"

"Could you please relax? I think that they are here.. Look"

"Spence.. here.." I waved my hand so she could see me.. My girls were beautiful. They were dressed rocking style.. Spencer was wearing her tight jeans I love with a black t-shirt of Rolling Stone and black converses. My little blond was the same as her mother.. Black t-shirt of Blondie, jeans and special mucic edition converses of Blondie.. They were adorable..

"Hey rock star.. Are you ready?"

"Now that you are here I am.."

"Momma.. how awe you?"

"I am better than good princess"

"When the show is going to start?"

"In an hour.."

"Ashh.. outside is sick.. I haven't seen so many people.."

"Your girl is awesome.."

"Yes, she is and she is mine.." oh, yes I was..

After an hour I could hear the crowd yelling my name… I take a look to see what was going out there.. the stadium was full.. Packed full.. I guess it would be the best concert I had after all these years.. I took a glass of water, looked myself on the mirror, kissed Spencer and found my way on the stage..

"Hello, California… How are we today???" I heard the crowd and it was amazing. Deep inside I know that I will miss this but I love Spencer more.. "Well, sorry for the last time but here we are today.. So what you say of starting this show??"

It was perfect. I had so much energy on stage.. I gave it all to this last concert.. After two hours it was my last songs.. I left them last for a reason.. I would say my goodbye to my funs with two songs written for my girls..

"So guys.. I will play to you two new songs that I was writing. You know that this is my last concert. I am married to a wonderful woman and have an amazing daughter. So these last two songs are for them. Spence, baby.. this is for you.." I said and I looked on her way.. I nodded to my guys and the guitarist started to play..

_And I'd give up forever to touch you_

_Cause I know that you feel me somehow_

_You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be_

_And I don't want to go home right now_

_And all I can taste is this moment_

_And all I can breathe is your life_

_Cause sooner or later it's over_

_I just don't want to miss you tonight_

_And I don't want the world to see me_

_Cause I don't think that they'd understand_

_When everything's made to be broken_

_I just want you to know who I am_

_And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming_

_Or the moment of truth in your lies_

_When everything seems like the movies_

_Yeah you bleed just to know your alive_

_And I don't want the world to see me_

_Cause I don't think that they'd understand_

_When everything's made to be broken_

_I just want you to know who I am_

_I don't want the world to see me_

_Cause I don't think that they'd understand_

_When everything's made to be broken_

_I just want you to know who I am_

_I just want you to know who I am_

_I just want you to know who I am_

_I just want you to know who I am_

_I just want you to know who I am_

When I finished the song I looked back to see Spencer. She was crying. She mouthed 'I Love You'. The crowd down there seemed to like it as well. I could see them yelling 'Ashley, Ashley'.

"I love you Spencer.". I said on the microphone. "Could you please come here so they could see the beautiful woman I married?" Spencer looked at me like I was crazy but she had a smile on her face. She came on stage and I had my hand open for her to take.. "Guys.. I guess you all know Spencer.. Say a big Hello to my beautiful wife.." they yelled 'kiss, kiss, kiss'. "What do you say Spence? Would you like to kiss me?" "I guess I could do this". We kissed on stage. Nothing to deep because there are perverts out there.. She whispered in my ears "I loved it baby.. I want you to play that for me some time again.." "Of course baby". She waved the crowd and left me on stage again. This would be my last song for today..

"Guys.. I guess you liked my new song.. Well.. I have a last one.. It's for my two loving blonds that stole my heart a year and some months ago.."

_Find Me Here_

_Speak To Me_

_I want to feel you_

_I need to hear you_

_You are the light_

_You are the light_

_To the place where I find peace again._

_You are the strength, that keeps me walking._

_You are the hope, that keeps me trusting._

_You are the light to my soul._

_You are my purpose...you're everything._

_How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?_

_Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?_

_  
You calm the storms, and you give me rest._

_You hold me in your hands, you won't let me fall._

_You steal my heart, and you take my breath away._

_Would you take me in? Take me deeper now?_

_How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?_

_Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?_

_And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?_

_Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?_

_Cause you're all I want, You're all I need_

_You're everything,everything_

_You're all I want your all I need_

_You're everything, everything._

_You're all I want you're all I need._

_You're everything, everything_

_You're all I want you're all I need, you're everything, everything._

_And h__ow can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?_

_Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?_

_How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?_

_Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?_

"Thank you California… You will always have a place in my heart.. Thank you for being with me for so long.. This was my last concert but you will hear about me again.. Love you all.. bye…"

I run to Spencer's side. She was crying. She took me in her arms as I did the same. I kissed her lips and now I was the one crying..

"Why are you crying? Your wife didn't write songs about you"

"I cry because I am happy and because I love you. Both of you.. You are my everything.."

"I love you too momma. You wewe amazing.. Wasn't she mommy?"

"She was awesome baby. Your momma is the best.."

"Are you ready to go to our home?"

"Always.."

I took one last look on the stage. It was sure the best concert I had. And it was for sure worth it.. She was worth it..

* * *

**TBC**

**Well? I hope you liked it.. So for you who don't know.. This two beautiful songs are not mine. Unfortunately.. First song is "Iris by Goo Goo Dolls" and second song is "Everything by Lifehouse".. They are my favourite favourite songs and I like the lyrics so very much!!!!**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**xx**


	38. Chapter 38

**So.. I've been thinking when the story ends, which will be in the next chapters, to write another one, of course Spashley. I even wrote the plot in my mind.. So what do you think? Would you like to read my new story??**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 38**

"Glen, are you sure you can handle this?"

"Ashley, you are ridiculous. Stop it ok? Jesus."

"I want to make sure that you can handle being with Christine for the next week. Are you sure?"

"Baby, could you please relax? I am sure Glen will be fine and Christine loves her uncle."

"But.. Spence.."

"No buts.. Ok?"

"Glen.."

"Now go please.. You are making a scene.. Everything is going to be fine. Right kiddo?"

"Yes, uncle Glen.."

"Princess I am going to miss you very very much. Very very much"

"Me too momma.. Will you call me evewy day?"

"Every day, every afternoon, every night.."

"Baby, come here. Give mommy a kiss."

"Mommy, momma have fun. Ok? I'll take cawe of uncle Glen"

"Har har.. very funny squirt. You are hilarious like your momma"

"I know uncle Glen.."

"Now give mommies kiss so we can leave. Ok? Be a good girl.."

"Bye mommy, bye momma"

"Bye my lesbian girls"

"Glen, I warn you.. If anything happens.."

"Go, Ashley.. Please.."

Well to say that it was easy to leave my child behind, yeah.. not true.. We were going to leave for a week. Honey moon. After my concert I promised Spencer that we would leave immediately. But the trip it was a surprise.. She tried to break me many times. With a lot of different ways. Sexual ways of course.. But I didn't say anything. Yes, I am strong if I want to..

I had a limo bring us to the airport. Of course my Porsche wouldn't fit my luggages. Yes, I said luggage's because I had two. Spencer had one.. What? I had to put my shoes somewhere.. and my make up.. and my clothes..

"Ash.. now that we are here would you please tell me where you are taking me? Please?"

"Ehm.. nope.. When we get on the jet you will find out.."

"You are bad and I hate you.."

"I am good and you love me. Now come on beautiful. We have a flight to catch"

"Always the charmer.."

"Always.."

What I've planned for our trip? Well it would be a small tour to Europe. Small because we couldn't leave more than a week. Spencer had to be back to the hospital and I had to start finding artists for my label. Yes, I found the place and it was perfect. As I dreamed it. So.. where we would go? Our first three days would be in Paris. Oh, the city of love. I love this place. I haven't been there till last time for my Europe tour. The other three days would be in Italy, Roma.

"Hello Mrs Davies, Mrs Davies. We are very happy to see you.."

"Hi, Jordan. Everything is fine?"

"Everything is perfect Mrs Ashley. As you told us.." Spencer gave me a look like 'what you told them? Tell me now'.

"I am very happy to hear that Jordan"

"Mrs Spencer, let me help you.." Jordan was my captain. He was my father's and now he is mine. This jet belonged to my father and in his will he left it to me. I use it only for personal reasons. When I want to go somewhere and noboby has to know or like now.. For my honeymoon..

"Thanks Jordan. How is your family?"

"They are fine Mrs Spencer.. I missed them a lot.."

"I know what you mean. And call me Spencer. Mrs Spencer sound old. And I am not my mother"

"Yes Mrs.. sorry.. Spencer.."

"Jordan.. can I ask you something?"

"Yes, of course.."

"Where are we going?"

"Spence.. I heard you. Don't you even think of asking where we are going.."

"I wasn't going to.."

"Come here now.. Leave Jordan do his job.."

"But.."

"Now.."

Jordan shrugged and smiled. I was sure that Spencer would ask him if she had the chance. But me, I am a step forward..

"Ash.. now that we are here care to share?"

"In five minutes you will know where are we going first.."

"First? Like we are going somewhere else too?"

"You'll see…"

In five minutes sharp I heard Jordan speak from the speaker..

"Hello, Mrs Ashley Davies, Hello, Mrs Spencer Davies.. Welcome to our flight. Today our destination will be Paris, France. We are going to arrive there in 10 and half hours. The weather seems to be good. Maybe we have some clear-air turbulence. But everything seems to be ok. Have a nice flight"

"PARIS???? LIKE FRANCE PARIS??"

"Is there another Paris you know?"

"PARIS??"

"Spence.. you seem happy.."

"PARIS??"

"Ok.. when you stop screaming Paris.."

"Ash.. I love you.. I am totally in love with you.." she stood up from her seat, sat on my lap and started kissing me. Like kissing me kissing me.. Tongue and everything..

"Ahem.. ahem.. sorry to interrupt but you have to seat down Ms. We are ready to take off"

Spencer was red like a tomato. She is so cute when she is blushing. She sat back to her seat and mouthed 'I love you'.

The trip to France was alright. We did have some air turbulence and when we arrived to Paris it was raining.. I guess Europe's weather is different from California. Now I start to think if I took some warm clothes with me.. Like I have any..

It was early in the morning when we arrived. Spencer was asleep.. I was tired but being in tour most of my life I was feeling ok. A limo was waiting for us at the airport to take us to Ritz Hotel. Best hotel in Paris. The plane would stay at CDG Airport. I paid for Jordan to stay at a hotel and I told him that when we were ready to leave I would call him so he could prepare the plane.

"Baby, wake up.. We are here"

"I'm seeepyyy.."

"I know baby.. Come on.." I tried to wake her up with kisses and promises for three amazing days and nights here..

"Ok.. I am up.."

She stepped outside and when she saw the hotel her jaw dropped.

"Ash.. this is expensive.."

"So? Come on. We have to go check in"

I paid for the suite. Always the best for my wife. I wanted this honeymoon to be unforgettable.. When we stepped inside Spencer was looking at it like it was a palace. Well clearly it was..

"So you like?"

"Are you kidding me?"

"You like?"

"I love it.."

"So want to sleep?"

"What time is back to the states?"

"Well it's 9am here.. So it's probably 12.15am there.."

"We should call Glen and tell him we are ok. We can call Christine when she wakes up. I think I am going to be confused with the time difference."

"That's why I am here baby"

We called Glen and then we took a shower and sleep for a while. Clearly Spencer had a jet lag. First trip out of the continent. For today I thought of a dinner on the boat on river Saine and Eiffel Tower.. Perfect..

"Spence are you ready?"

"Yes, I am jut looking for my jacket.. Now I am ready"

"Ok.. first stop Eiffel Tower"

"Oh, I always wanted to go there"

"Well now you have your chance.."

Eiffel Tower had million lights that change their rhythm minute after minute. It was nice. We took our ticket and went straight to the second floor. It was way too high to go to the third.. I took her in my arms kissing her neck. It was perfect. I can't find other words to describe it. You could see Sacre Coeur, Notre Dame, Arc de Triomphe. Paris was on our feet. Well.. on our height? Whatever.

"Ash.. this view is amazing."

"It is. Isn't it?" I said looking straight at her

"I love you"

"I love you more. Come on. I have planned something else"

"What?"

"We will have to go down first"

Alma Bridge was near to the Eiffel Tower. It was where all the boats leave for the boat tour. I made special reservations for us to be alone and have dinner in one of them. Romantic.. Don't you think?

We saw the Paris by night. We saw all the monuments that were on each side of the Ile de La Cite and Ile Saint Luis. But most monuments are on Ile de La Cite. It was a perfect first day here. And I was happy that Spencer was happy.

"Ash.. what time is back home?"

"It is 3.15pm. Would you like to call our daughter?"

"Yes, please.."

Christine would be home that hour. I missed my little girl very much.

"Yes?"

"Is that a way to speak on the phone Glen?"

"Hello to you too Ashley."

"Hi. Is Christine there?"

"Yes, wait a sec"

"Momma??"

"Princess? How are you baby girl?"

"I'm fine momma. How awe you? How is mommy?"

"Mommy is here. Wait a sec. Love you baby girl"

"Love you too momma"

"Sweetie? How are you baby? Yes, mommy and I are doing fine. How was school? Yes? Nice baby. Mommy miss you honey. Very much. Eat all your food ok? Love you baby"

When Spencer closed the phone I saw tears in her eyes. I am sure I had the same tears..

"I am happy Ash. I am.. I just miss her.. I never been away from her for so long"

"I know baby. I miss her too."

"But I loved it today. It was amazing"

"We have two more days till we leave again"

"What do you mean?"

"Ooopss .."

"Ash.."

"Come on.. I want to make love to you all night. We are in Paris. Aren't we?"

"Always a charmer.."

We came back to our hotel where of course I made love to Spencer all night. I don't know if it was the place, the country or anything but I was a new woman here.. We didn't sleep till early morning hours. I guess I was needy?

Today was a new day. I made reservations to the most famous restaurant in Paris. You have to reserve a table there a month ago. Budha Bar.. After that we would go to Follie Bergere the best Cabaret.. I wanted everything to be perfect.. And it was.. I was here with Spencer and that meant everything.. But have you heard that when you feel totally happy something comes up and steal your happiness. What stole my happiness was a ghost.. Yes, you heard me. A ghost of the past. Do you know what the sad thing is? That I remember every woman I've been with. Every single of them. I believe that is a curse. Do you know who my curse is? Jessica. The Jessica I fucked a year ago in Paris. The Jessica who didn't know who I was at the beginning and when she found out she wanted me to sign on her underwear. That Jessica..

"ASHLEY, ASHLEY" I tried not to turn. I thought it was a fan. Tonight I was with my wife and I didn't want anyone to disturb us. And this celebrity thing it was so in the past..

"Baby.. someone calls your name"

"Never mind. Come"

"ASHLEY, it's me Jessica"

"Ash.. I think that woman knows you and probably you know her too" Spencer said looking like she would kill me and Jessica. What am I doing now?

"Spence.."

"Hey sexy, there you are.. Didn't you hear me calling your name?"

"Hmm.. no.."

"Where have you been? I watched your tour. You did good." She said coming closer to me and touching my arm.

"California? That's where I live?"

"Hm.. I missed you.. After you everyone was a bad fuck. I still remember our night. You were amazing.." I was red because Spencer was next to me, Spencer was red because of fury and Jessica kept going..

"Ehm.. Jessica.. nice meeting you.. Take care"

"What? Aren't you joining me? So we could remember last time?"

"NO, SHE is not going to join you because SHE is with ME" Ok. Now Spencer was totally a different person. It was kind of hot

"And who are you?"

"HER wife. So NO, SHE will not join you"

"Her wife? Nice Ashley. You have a great taste in woman"

"Ehmm.."

"Yes, she has. Now if you please excuse us we are leaving so we could continue from where we left on. If you know what I mean.."

Spencer took my hand rather violently. I guess she wanted to show Jessica that I was hers. Of course I was hers. There was no question in this..

"Spence..?"

"Ashley.."

"Spence are you ok?"

"Why not be?"

"Because you seem like you are not"

"I'm ok."

"Are you sure?"

"Jesus Ash.. yes, I am ok. What do you want?"

"Spence, baby.. She was someone before I met you. Actually I met her here a year ago. I won't say that we didn't fucked. Because that was it. A good fuck. But then the same night I met you and you stole my heart. And every second, every minute I thought of how I could reach you. How I could find you.. And we did find each other. We are married and we have a beautiful daughter. And I love you very much.. So are we ok?"

We didn't say anything else because our lips were talking now. I guess we were ok..

"Ash.. I believe you. I just when I saw her I lost it. I thought of her touching you and you touching her. And I lost it. I know you are mine. And I know you have a past but seeing this called past in front of me it's hard.."

"Baby.. I know.. and I am sorry. I am sorry you had to feel like that.. I love you and only you."

"I love you too. Now make love to me because I want to feel you inside of me.."

"Whatever my queen wants.."

It was another night of passion sex with my wife.. I love Paris…

* * *

**TBC**

**Well what can I say?? I LOVE PARIS.. No, unfortunately I am not from there but I've been there twice. I just love it.. So if you want travel guidance of what to see or where to go.. ask me.. I guess there are two or three chapters till the end.. I wrote 38 chapters?? WOW..**


	39. Chapter 39

**Well.. I suppose till Friday this story will come to its end. This weekend I'll write the first chapters of my new story. Hope I can see you there as well.. For now enjoy the new chapter..**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 39**

Our honeymoon was, what other words are there to define perfect? Well it was amazing. Spencer loved Paris as I knew she would. She loved Italy as well but I do believe that she has a special thing for Paris. Who wouldn't? Italy from the other hand was a little bit different from Paris. You can feel the aura of the Mediterranean people. When they speak you think they sing. As for the men and women? If I wasn't gay.. men there.. wow.. very good looking.

We went to Vatican, St. Peter, piazza Espana, we made our wish to the fountain of Fontana Di Trevi. We tried to see almost everything. But Rome is a little bit difficult to be seen in three days. The weather was quite good. It was warmer than Paris. I promised her next time we would visit Venice. Before she longer stop exists..

It was a week I could never forget. I wasn't alone with my love for a long time and I think we needed that. But now we both missed our home and our daughter so very much.. It was our time to return where our heart was.. Christine..

"Baby?"

"Hm..?"

"Are you tired?"

"Ash.. I am not going to have sex with you inside the airplane toilets.."

"What? I wasn't.." she looked at me but really I wasn't thinking of having sex inside that small room. It's claustrophobic there.. Maybe a little.. just a make out..

"Sorry.. I can't hear you.. care to tell me again?"

"Alright.. maybe.. I thought of touching you.. but I wasn't thinking of having sex.."

"Maybe touching me eh? Ash.. we both now that you never compromise only by touching me.. You love my body that much.."

"Sue me ok?"

"You are so cute when you are sexually frustrating.. And to answer your question no I am not tired.."

"So.. want to come and find me inside the toilet?" I said with my nose crinkled as I know she loves and can't really resist..

"Ash…"

"I'll be waiting for you my love.." I kissed her nose and made my way touching her with my leg before I go to the meeting point.. I hope she would come..

After 3 minutes she opened the door without knocking of course.. I wasn't in there to pee.. I was there to have my way with my beautiful wife..

"Took you all three minutes to come?"

"I would come in 1 minute but I don't want to spoil you my love.. And you loved being spoiled.."

We were now inside this small room. Spencer's back was on the door. My hands on her torso, watching her eyes then her lips.. She was looking at me like she wanted to rip my clothes off. She could rip my clothes off whenever she wanted..

"Ash.. I have a little confession to make.." my lips where now on her neck kissing, licking, biting.. I knew that it wasn't easy for her to continue..

"Ahm.. Asshh.. mmm.. have.. to.. tell you something.." my lips never leaving her neck I continued kissing her trailing my kisses from her neck to her collarbone.

"Asssh.. I wanted to fuck you the moment I saw you to that airplane a year ago…"

"Baby.. I wanted to fuck you the moment I saw you there too.. You were on my mind the moment I saw you to that hotel.."

"So now.. we are making.. both our fantasy?"

"Oh, yes baby.."

Considering the place we were of course we couldn't do much.. But.. we were so lucky because we were both light dressed.. I was wearing my mini skirt and Spencer wearing a dress.. Easy access. So easy access…

My hands were on her breasts, massaging them. I pulled down the straps from her dress while kissing the place they occupied.. I raised her dress and I had her leg placed to my waist.. I was kissing her breasts and my hand was already inside of her underwear, touching her centre. She was so wet already.. She is such a turn on..

"Spence.. God.. you are so wet baby.."

"Assshhh.. mmm.. baby.."

I had two of my fingers inside of her. Thrusting her.. I will never get tired of having her with me. Making love to her, touching her, feeling her.. She is mine and I am hers.

"more.. Assshh.. I want more…"

I put another finger inside of her.. She was so tight but yet so addicted. I so wanted to have her on our bed now.. But having public sex it was always a turn on.. Not public inside a jet but still..

I was licking her breasts biting a little like she wanted to.. She would have a bruise tomorrow.. Our moves were synchronized. Her walls tightening my fingers..

"Ash.. yes.. baby.. I'm.. Oh.. my God… ASHHH"

I kissed her lips letting my tongue touch her bottom lip. I was asking for entrance and she was so ready to give it to me.. I kissed her till we both need air to breathe and my hands were still inside her underwear..

"Oh, my God Ash.. that was.. different baby.."

"Sure was.. next time I will take you to see a movie.. We can do it again.."

"Ash.."

I knew that look. I invented that look. It was the look 'I want you right here right now'..

She lifted my body and now I was sitting on the hand basin. My mini skirt was like a belt now and Spencer had easy access to do whatever she wanted for me. And I was so ready..

She had both of her hands on my breasts. Without raising my shirt or unbuttoning my bra she brought it down and now my breasts were in full view in front of her.. She was licking and biting my nipples that were already hard because of her dexterous mouth and tongue.. I was so already wet and I needed her.. I wanted her inside of me..

Her mouth was still on my breast and her hand was already inside of me, rubbing my clit. I was so clever to wear a thong today and not my boy shorts.. Did I plan this? Maybe I did..

I moaned under her every touch. I couldn't speak, I couldn't think. Everything was a blur to me.. That's what she always do to me..

Without knowing it she had already two of her fingers inside of me.. She felt so good.. We are the perfect feat. We are the yin and the yan. Day and night.. Opposites that are so perfect for each other.. Soul mates..

I came on her hand and I just laid there just a little so I could feel again my knees and walk for myself.. Yes, I had an orgasm inside the toilet of my jet..

"Spence.. we so definitely will do this again.."

"Always my pleasure satisfying you baby.."

"And always my pleasure satisfying you Mrs Davies.."

"Do you think you can walk?" she said having this huge grin on her face.. She knew what she did to me..

"After what you did? I don't think so.. but I'll try my best.. Will you hold me?"

"Oh, Ash.. I am so happy.. You are making me so happy.."

"Good to know.. I love you Spence.. Don't you ever forget that.."

We kissed again, looked ourselves on the mirror to see if we were presentable and walked out.. Of course the airhostess looked at us like she knew what we did inside.. Of course she did.. It wasn't an air bus.. And we weren't quiet..

"Did you see how she looked at us?"

"Never mind.. She is just jealous because she can't have you.."

"Ash.."

"Yes, right.. Like I didn't catch her looking at you like she wanted to rip your clothes.."

"Ash.."

"What?"

"You are so cute when you are jealous.. And don't be because I could never leave anyone touch me the way you do.. No one.."

"Like I would let anyone touch you.. Ha"

After 11 hours we were back to Cali. Back to our home and back to our beautiful daughter..

"Hey girls.. How was your trip? Did you have fun?"

"Yes, we did Glen. And it was amazing. relaxing.."

"I see.. You 'relaxed' a lot?" he said and I knew what he meant. Two can play this game my boy..

"Several times Glen.. Your sister is unstoppable.." Spencer was next to me and hit my arm.. "What? You are a sex kitten.."

"Oh, my God Ash.. if you don't stop right now forget sex for a week.."

"It will be your loss too honey.."

"GIRLS.. as much I love you and everything please don't do that infront of me.. It's too much to think my sister having sex with her wife who happens to be a woman.."

"Do you have a problem with that Glenny??" I said kissing Spencer on her neck. Both brother and sister were for a picture..

"Ehm.. Glen.. how was our girl?"

"She was an angel Spence. But she missed her moms."

"Wait till she sees what I've got for her.."

"I couldn't hold her back.. Whenever she puts something in that mind of hers.."

"You know me Spence.. You know exactly how I am.." I said and I was sure she remembers the incident back to air.. haha..

"Thank you Glen for everything.."

"It was nothing sis. Whenever you want me to babysit again.."

"I'm sure we'll call you Glenny"

"Is that a new name Ash? Really.. Because if it is I don't want it.."

"Whatever you say Glenny.."

"Spence.."

"Ash.."

"WHAT?"

………**.**

Six months and I felt like it was like four days earlier that I married Spencer. Life with my girls it's amazing. We discussed with Spencer of growing our family. We both wanted another child but with our jobs we couldn't sit down and make a decision. All I was sure was that I wanted to carry our baby. I wanted both of us to be mothers.

Spencer was unsure at the beginning. When I told her that I wanted to be the one who will have our baby she looked at me like I was hit on my head or something. At first I felt strange. Like 'didn't she believe in me?'. To be true I was a little bit angry of her. Did she not think that I would be a good mother? Did she not think that I wanted it so much? Questions were running through my head and as always I assumed things. But I learned for my mistakes and I just asked her what she meant.. I remember our dialogue from back then..

"_Spence? Why are you looking me like that? Did I say something strange?"_

"_Ash.. no.. But you want to really be pregnant?"_

"_Spence.. Why? Is it so strange?"_

"_No, baby it isn't but I always thought that you liked your body way too much and being pregnant is not that easy"_

"_Think I don't know? Do you think I am an idiot or something?"_

"_Ash.. I didn't say such a thing.."_

"_Do you think that I won't be a good mother? What? Please tell me.."_

"_Ash.. you are a great mother.. I see you with Christine every day and I know you will be a great mother when we have another child. I just wasn't sure that you really wanted to be the birth mother of our child."_

"_Well.. I want to. I want to feel how you felt. I want us to be both mothers." She came and sat next to me taking my hands in hers.._

"_Baby.. if you are sure I am sure. If you want we can try and I'll be next to you to every step. I will hold your hand, I will go and buy you whatever you ask me when you have that cravings and I will be with you when you will give birth to our little boy or girl"_

"_Girl.."_

"_You want another girl?"_

"_Yes, I want another girl. I know that in the near future I will have to kick some asses if someone touches my girls but…"_

"_I love you so much. So much Ash.. So are we trying to be moms?"_

"_I guess so.."_

That night was amazing. We made love to each other all night. That was ten months ago. Because we did tried to be moms. And I got lucky. And now I have a life growing inside of me. And it's perfect. It's a new feeling that I haven't felt and I can't describe.

We got to a sperm bank and tried to find the perfect donor. I wanted to be blond and with blue eyes so if he or she were born I wanted to look like Spencer. Spencer from the other hand wanted to look like me. I guess we will find out when our child will be born because Spencer donated her eggs. I can't wait to give birth..

My first months weren't easy. But Spencer was near me holding my hand as she promised me too. I wasn't the pregnant woman who when something smelled she wanted to have it right away. Actually I wasn't hungry at all. My belly started to look like I was carrying a baby when I was 6 months. Spencer was a little afraid of that. She was scared that something wasn't going good with my pregnancy. Although my complaining she drugged me to my doctor right away..

"Ash.. don't be a baby ok? What if something is wrong? It's not that common for a pregnant woman not to want to eat? Ok.. I am starting to get worry."

"It's ok Spence.. Really.. you will see that the doctor will say the same.."

"Come on. We are going." She came and took my hand so I could stand and follow her..

"Spence.."

"No. We are going.. What if it has to do with your illness and the medication you took? Eh? Oh, my God Ash.." she started crying and I didn't want to see her like that. I just took her in my arms and held her so she could see that everything were going to be fine..

"Baby.. look at me.. Spence.. look at me.." she looked at me straight in the eyes and her blue ones were blurry "Everything is going to be fine. Our baby is fine and I am fine. Ok? Now if you feel better for us to go to see the doctor I will go. Ok?"

"Ash.. I am afraid.."

"Don't be.. Because we are together. Because we will always be together. You, me and our children.."

Now that I was thinking about it it really was something. But I didn't want to scare Spencer. Sometimes I felt dizzy and some others I would vomit whatever I ate. Spencer didn't know because she would get worry. I promised her once that I wouldn't keep anything from her but I will always feel the need to protect her. To tell you the truth I was afraid and I just pushed it behind. Now that I had to face the doctor I was truly afraid of what he would tell us..

* * *

**TBC**

**Well I couldn't stay away from a little bit agony.. What can I say? Hope you liked what you read..**

**Reviews are always welcome**

**xx**


	40. Chapter 40

**Chapter 40**

I didn't know what we were going to find out. All I did know was that I was afraid. I was afraid of my child. What if they had to take the baby from me with a caesarian section? Oh, my God.. I had to tell Spencer how I was feeling. What was happening.. Mistakes, mistakes.. Why I always do the same thing? Why?

"Ash.. we are here. Are you feeling ok?"

"To tell you the truth Spence. No.."

"What? Is it the baby? Do you hurt somewhere?"

"Spence.. I didn't tell you.." now I had Spencer's full attention.

"Ash? What you didn't tell me?"

"Spence.. I am so sorry.." now I was crying. I was crying for two reasons. First because if something would happen to our baby it would be my fault and second I didn't know what Spencer would feel.. Will she hate me?

"Ash.. for what are you sorry?"

"I.. I.. wasn't feeling well for a long time now"

"…."

"Spence.. please say something.. please.." she was holding the wheel so tight that I saw her fingers starting to go white..

"Spence..?"

"Ash.. I.. can't believe you.."

"Baby..?"

"No. You are doing the same again and again. But now it isn't only you. You have a life inside of you. You have our baby inside of you. How you couldn't tell me how you felt? How?"

"I didn't know it was something. I thought it was a pregnancy thing. Like all women have. I didn't know.."

"I was here for you. I am here for you. Why?"

"Because I didn't want to worry you. Because I worried you enough and you have so much going with your work.."

"Ash.. you and Christine and our baby are my first priority. Haven't you noticed by now? You are always my first."

We both cried. I removed my belt so I could hug her. She was crying on my shoulder and I hated myself for everything I out her going through.

"I am sorry baby.. I am so so sorry. I don't know what else to say."

"All I want now is to find out if something is wrong with you and our baby."

"Will you forgive me for not saying anything to you?"

"Ash.. all I think is for you to be ok and so our baby. Nothing else matters.." she said and touched my belly. I put my hand on hers and held it there. Her touch always makes me feel better. I hope everything is fine..

"Girls, how are you?"

"Hey, Anna. It's Ashley" We had a woman gynecologist. She was a friend of Spencer's and she was the best.

"Ashley? Are you ok? Spencer called me yesterday and told me she was worried about your pregnancy."

"Actually I had some problems.."

"Anna, she doesn't eat and she felt dizzy and when she eats she goes and takes everything out."

"Spencer.. You are a doctor and a mother. These symptoms you tell me it's something common. Not every woman has the cravings."

"But.. I am worried.. almost a year ago she had some problems with her health and she was stubbed."

"You didn't tell me anything about it. Ashley, come on so we can have some tests and do an ultrasound to see if the baby is ok."

"Anna.. can I come in with you?"

"Of course you can. I guess I can't hold you back from your girl"

"Not really."

Anna did some blood tests and an ultrasound. She was quite and when someone doesn't say anything I guess it means something wrong..

"Anna? Is something wrong?"

"Well.."

"Anna, please tell us. Is something wrong with the baby?"

"The ultrasound shows how the baby grows.. It's too small for a six month. Smaller that it should be.."

"Oh, my God.." Spencer was crying and I was .. I don't know how I was..

"Spence.. what does this mean?" Spencer didn't say anything. She was beside me holding my hands and my belly.

"Ashley.. that means that if the baby doesn't gain weight till it is your month he or she will have a problem.."

"Do you know the gender?" Spencer and I didn't want to know the gender from the beginning. We wanted to be surprised. But now I want to know if my baby girl or baby boy is going to be fine.

"Yes. Would you like to know?" both Spencer and I looked in each other eyes and nodded to Anna.

"It's a girl."

"It's a girl Spence.. It's a girl."

"It's a girl baby. Our little girl"

"Anna what I have to do?"

"Well we have to wait to see your blood tests first Ashley. But I guess we will put you on a diet so the baby takes all the proteins and we hope for the best.."

"And if I have this diet everything is going to be fine?"

"I really hope so. It depends of you and the baby Ashley"

"I'll do anything just for her to be ok."

"Ok. Now if you will excuse me. I am going to take your blood tests. Wait me here and I'll be back in a few minutes"

"Spence.. what if.."

"No ifs Ash. No ifs. Everything is going to be fine. We must not lose our hope.."

"But Spence.. I am afraid.."

"Me too baby. Me too. But we have to be strong for each other. Ok?"

"Ok, baby. I love you"

"I love you too. I love both of you very much" we kissed and then she kissed my belly and rested her head there until Anna was inside with my blood tests..

"Ahh.. sorry girls.."

"It's ok Anna. Do you have the blood tests?"

"Yes"

"Well?"

"Ashley you iron is lower than it should be and what worries me is that your white blood cells are higher than usual.."

"Ash.."

"Spence.."

"Anna.. Ashley had a health problem a year ago. Her white blood cells were extremely high and she had to take medication for a long time"

"I am sorry Spencer but it seems that the problem is back. Maybe it has to do with her pregnancy."

"What does this mean? Last time I had to take medication and for a long time I wasn't feeling well. What am I going to do now Anna?"

"Obviously we can not take the same medication because it isn't good for the baby."

"What are we going to do?"

"I'll prescribe you another medication which it's not that strong and we start the diet with proteins. You will come back in a month to see how she is and if you still have a problem you will stay here till it is your month so we can keep up with your pregnancy."

"Is there anything I can do?"

"No, Spencer. All you can do is stay with Ashley and look after her. You will have to stay together in this."

"Thanks Anna. For everything"

"It is nothing. If you feel anything Ashley call me even if it's 4am. Ok? I am waiting to see you in a month"

"Bye Anna"

I changed to my outfit and we went to buy my new medications. If I do everything fine my girl will be ok. Right now I don't care for myself. I care only for my baby.

"Ash.. I took the medicine. I read the inscriptions. It's not as strong as the others and it says that you maybe feel nauseous."

"It isn't something new. I feel nauseous for a long time now"

"Baby.. we will get through this. Together. Ok?"

"Together. Always"

_One month later_

"Ash.. are you ready? We have to be at the hospital in 30 minutes"

"I am ready Spence."

"Are you feeling ok?"

"Better than yesterday but ok"

"Good. And how is my girl today?"

"She kicks all day. I guess she wants to get out."

"Feisty like her mother I see."

"You know it baby"

This month wasn't easy not for me and not for Spencer also. I did the diet Anna suggested and I took the medicine. I was starting to feeling better but I wanted to be sure when we would go and see Anna.

We were outside the hospital and I was waiting inside the car. Spencer was already out and to my side.

"Ash.. come on baby.."

"I am afraid Spence.."

"I'll be there and hold your hand. Ok?"

"Ok. Will you kiss me?"

"You are something Mrs Davies"

"You love me"

"I adore you. Now come on so I can give you your kiss"

"Yes ma'am"

"Ashley and Spencer. My two favorite girls. How are we?"

"Hey, Anna. Well we will find out. Don't we?"

"Nervous eh?"

"A little, yes"

"Ok, come so we can see how the mother and the baby are"

"Spence.. will you come with me?"

"Anna, is it ok?"

"Of course.. Let's go"

After half an hour and some tests Spencer and I were waiting inside the examination room. Spencer was passing the room. She was worried as much as I was..

"Anna.. is everything ok?"

"Spencer you might want to sit down"

"Oh, my God. Anna please tell us that everything is fine.."

"Well, the diet seems to be working. The baby gained some weight and you will continue with the diet till it is your month. Now.. I am still worried about Ashley. Her blood cells are still high. Clearly the medications don't do the same job as the other did. But considering the situation we can't give you stronger medication Ashley. Sorry. We will continue with the same prescription but I suggest you should come here for the last two months."

I didn't care for myself. All I cared was our baby. If she was ok I was ok. If I had to come and stay here for two months I would. Only for her to be ok.

Spencer was skeptical. I new she was worried for me. I am sure now the ifs were running through her head. But for once I would be the stronger one..

"Baby.. it is ok. If I stay here I will have the doctors checking on me and our baby so you won't have to worry"

Spencer looked at me and I saw tears running through her face. She looked at me and she stormed outside the room. I wasn't mad. I knew she was afraid with everything. First the baby and then me. She had to worry for both of us. And we still had a little one waiting for her moms.

Christine was so happy of having a little sister to take care of. She was waiting for her little baby sister so she could feed her and nap her. She always said 'I'll be the best sistew'.

"Ashley.."

"It's ok Anna. I know Spencer. This last two years were too much for her. When we were together in the first year I was stubbed by a stalker. It wasn't good. They had to remove my spleen and then I did something stupid and I had to do surgery again. She almost lost me. Then when I was in tour I wasn't feeling well and I collapsed. That's when we found out about my blood cells. The medications, as you know, were very strong and I wasn't feeling good for a long time. Spencer had to be strong for me and she was all alone to take care of me. And now this with our baby and well.. me again. It is too much for her and I don't blame her."

"I am sorry Ashley. I didn't know all this. I guess it is too much for both of you. We will try to do the best for you and the baby."

"Thank you Anna. It means a lot"

We didn't see Spencer standing there. I guess she heard everything because she had tears in her eyes. She came close to me and took my face in her hands kissing me and touching her forehead with mine.

"I guess I'll leave you too alone"

"Thanks Anna for everything. I want to ask you something.."

"Of course Spencer."

"Could you please arrange Ashley's room to have another bed? I want to be next to her.."

"Spence.."

"No, Ash.. I want to be near you and our baby. I told you we were together in this."

"I can't persuade you for the opposite eh?"

"Not even close."

"Ok, girls. Ashley you can come in two days. I'll have everything prepared for you. And you Spencer. Ok?"

"Ok. I will bring her in two days"

"Bye and be careful. Ok?"

"Ok Anna" we both said unison.

I guess the next two months will be awesome? I really hope for the best. For all of us..

* * *

**TBC**

**Next chapter will be the last.. . But don't worry. After finishing this story I am writing a new one. So.. till next chapter..**

**Reviews are always welcome..**

**xx**


	41. Chapter 41

**Hey guys… This is the last chapter.. Thank you all for your wonderful reviews.. It means a lot.. Thank you for reading and staying with me in every chapter..**

**

* * *

  
**

**Chapter 41**

"Hey baby.. Goodmorning.."

"Hey you.. Did you sleep well?" she said with a grin.. She knew I didn't sleep because she wore me out..

"Well.. I had a beautiful, sexy blond in my bed yesterday and I did things to her and you know one thing led to another and we had sex all night.."

"Oh.. I see.. so you didn't sleep well?"

"I didn't sleep at all.."

"That good?"

"Yes.." I was behind her kissing her neck while she prepared our breakfast.. My hands were traveling inside her shirt and I ..

"Mom.. jesus.. Why I am always in the middle of your loving?"

"Hey princess.."

"Jesus.. it's still morning.."

"What can I say?? I love your mommy very very much.."

"I think I might now.."

"Where is your sister?"

"Still sleeping.. I swear, even if a bomb was outside she wouldn't get up from her bed.."

"She takes that from you baby.."

"I know.."

"Christine, could you please go and wake up you sister?"

"Mom, I can't wake her up and I am hungry and I need to go to school earlier today.."

"Ok ok.. I'll go.."

You are wondering.. Well.. I gave birth to my daughter 13 years ago.. Yes, 13 years.. How time pass eh? Unfortunately the time don't pass that easy when your life is on a rope.. And my life was at that time.. Those two months I had to be at the hospital..

When the time came for me to give birth I was afraid. I had all the help I needed. Anna was there for me as Spencer. The baby was growing and I couldn't feel happier. But my health wasn't. Spencer was afraid and I was afraid. But I would give birth even if I had to die later..

When it was the time everything went so fast. Anna took me inside the OR. Spencer was inside holding my hand as she told me she would. I wanted her there.. It wasn't easy..

I had a caesarian section.. Because it seemed that my girl had a different idea.. After that I don't remember anything.. All I remember it's my baby's cry and then nothing..

_Before I open my eyes I heard Spencer's voice.. It was like she was crying. Why she was crying?_

"_Ash.. please wake up.. You have to see our beautiful daughter.. She has blue eyes and your hair, and your nose. She looks like you.. Please baby.. wake up for us.."_

_My baby girl.. She has blue eyes.._

"_Ash.. we said that we will be together in this.. You and me and our girls.. I need you to be with me.. I need you to open your eyes.."_

_And then I don't know when or how, I opened them,. At first everything was blurry. But I could see Spencer sitting beside me holding me.._

"_Ash.. Baby..? Open your beautiful eyes for me.."_

"_Spen-ce?"_

"_Ash.. Oh, my God.. Asshh" she kissed my forehead and she stood up immediately. I already missed her warmth next to me.._

"_Baby.. I am going to find Anna. Ok? I'll be back in a sec"_

_Like I could go anywhere.. Why she was crying.. What happened? And how was my baby?_

"_Anna, she awaked"_

"_Ashley? You scared us honey"_

"_Wh-at happe-ned?"_

"_Let me check your vitals first"_

"_Anna is she ok?"_

"_From what I can see she is alright.."_

"_Wh-at?"_

"_Ashley you were in coma for a week. While we were inside the OR you collapsed. We almost lost you but we brought you back.. We took your baby by caesarian section. She is fine. She is strong like her mother.."_

"_But why I was in coma?"_

"_This pregnancy with the health problem you had brought your system down. We thought you were going to wake up after two days but you were in coma for a week. You scared us.."_

"_Didn't want to.." I said and I looked Spencer who looked me back.._

"_So you want to see your beautiful girl?"_

"_Yes, please.."_

_Anna left the room and came back with my baby girl. Spencer took her in her arms and gave her to me.. She was a little miracle. She was so tiny. Her little fingers, her little mouth. She had blue eyes like my Spencer's and brown hair like mine.._

"_Ash.. she is perfect.."_

"_She is.. Isn't she? I can't believe I am holding her Spence.."_

"_Ash.. you scared me.."_

"_Sorry baby.. But now I am ok.. See? We are ok. Both mother and daughter.._

_Spencer told me that they gave my medication while I was in coma. So now my blood cells were coming back to normal and I didn't have to feel bad like the other time.. Everything was perfect.._

_When we returned back home all family was there.. They wanted to see our little baby girl. Aiden was there, Kyla was there, Glen, Mr. Carlin. Everyone we loved.._

"_I don't believe you are a mother Ash.."_

"_Well believe it.. But what do you mean? For two years I was a mother Kyla. You seem to forget that I have another daughter"_

"_I didn't forget asshole, but you know what I mean. Giving birth.. You? Kind of surprised.. But I am happy I'll have another niece.. Now where is the little one?"_

"_She is with Spencer and her family inside the living room. Where is Aiden?"_

"_He is coming.. He had practice"_

"_I see.. Come on.."_

_Inside the living room there was Glen, Mr. C and Spencer with our daughters.. Christine was so happy that she would be the big sister. She loved her role.._

"_Mommy, why she has her eyes closed?"_

"_Because she is still a baby sweetie and she wants her sleep. You were the same"_

"_I was so little?"_

"_Yes, baby girl."_

"_Can I hold her mommy? I'll be careful"_

"_Ok.. Sit better on the couch so you can hold her better"_

_She was adorable.. I saw her from across the room.. She opened her arms and sit better on the couch.. She had a smile on her face and I swear I heard her whispering a song.. It was the lullaby I sang her every night before she got to sleep. And now she did the same for her baby sister.._

_I got back and searched my bag for my digital.. I wanted to frame what I was experiencing.. Definitely a picture for our night stand.._

_Aiden was now home and we were all sitting together laughing until our door knocked.. We didn't expect anyone else.. I looked at Spencer and she shrugged.. I stood up to go and see who that was.. I was a little bit surprised to see a Paula Carlin standing on my door. Neither of us were speaking.. I was just there holding the door.._

"_Baby, who is at the door?" Spencer came behind me and opened the door wider so she could see who was and why I was still standing there.. "MOM? What are you doing here?"_

"_Spencer, Ashley may I come in?" I turned my face from THE Paula Carlin and looked at Spencer.. I didn't know what to do.._

"_What are you doing here mom? How you knew where to knock?"_

"_Spencer, please. Can I come in?"_

"_It will have to be quick. We have company"_

"_I know. It won't be for long"_

_When she came inside she saw everyone in the living room and she just smiled.._

"_Is she__ your new member of your family?"_

"_Mom, it's the third time I am asking you. WHAT are you doing here?"_

"_Maybe we could go inside the kitchen?"_

"_Why? We can talk right here. It's our family. We don't hide anything from them.."_

"_Ok. I came here to say sorry." Spencer laughed really hard __but it was more an ironic laugh.._

"_Sorry, but you made me smile.. Thank you though because I didn't smile for a long time now.."_

"_Spencer, please don't be like this"_

"_Like this? LIKE THIS? Are you kidding me? Where were you MOM when Ashley was stubbed? Where were you when I thought that I would lose my love? Where were you when we were going to be married? Let me tell you.. You weren't anywhere. So why are you here now?"_

"_Spencer.. I made a mistake.. please.. I wasn't thinking straight"_

"_Mom, you did think straight. You couldn't bear the thought that I was in love with Ashley, who obviously is a woman. You walked out of my life and now you want to come back?"_

"_Spencer.. you are my daughter. I love you very much. Now I can accept who you are. You have a beautiful family Spencer. I can see it now. I was blind. I thought Ashley wasn't the one for you. For crying out loud she was some famous rock star. I thought you were a candy for her. A new thing for the night. I was thinking about you.."_

"_You didn't give her the chance mother. You just assumed. You couldn't see how happy I was. How she made me feel. And now as you can see I wasn't some new candy. We have our family. We have our daughters. And we are happy."_

"_I can see it now. Spencer, please.. I want to be in your life again. I want to see my granddaughters grow up. To be a part in their life. Please.."_

_All this time I was just there seeing them talking to each other. It was a mother-daughter thing. But now it was time for me to speak.._

"_Excuse me.. Paula..__ Now it's my turn. I heard everything you said. I wanted to hate you for what you did to Spencer. But you are her mother and I couldn't. But know that I think that you are a bitch. No mother has the right to treat her daughter as you did.. I don't know about Spencer and it's something that we will have to discuss together but if you mean everything you are saying I would love my daughter to have a grand mother. But it's just me. If Spencer doesn't want you in our daughter's life I can't do anything about it.. So it's her call.."_

_I saw Spencer asking me with her eyes 'what the fuck Ash?'. We had an eye to eye conversation. It was our thing.._

"_I don't know mother.. I have to think about it with Ash. And I'll let you know."_

"_Thank you Spencer. It's all I can ask about. And thank you Ashley. I am so sorry I misjudged you. Now I leave you two.. Thank you again"_

"_Paula, do you want to see our daughter?"_

"_Ehm.. I.. don't know.."_

"_Come.. It's ok.."_

_Christine still was holding her baby sister. When Paula came inside the living room everyone stood still. Even her son and husband.._

"_Gramma.. come and see my baby sister. Isn't she pretty?"_

"_Yes, she is honey. She looks like your mother"_

"_I know. Momma is pretty too. That's why mommy love her too much"_

"_Can I hold her?" I just nodded. I could see that Paula Carlin had changed. I saw it in her eyes. "She is beautiful Spencer. Very beautiful. You both did a great job. I am happy for you"_

"_Thanks"_

_Paula gave our baby girl back to Spencer. She looked back to us.._

"_It was nice seeing you all here. Take care of your family Ashley"_

"_I will. Thank you"_

_She was standing at the door ready to open it when Spencer came close.._

"_I will call you mom."_

"_I'll be waiting. Bye.."_

And here we are today.. 13 years later.. And I am outside my daughters door ready to wake her up..

"Sweetie.. wake up.. It's late.."

"mmm.. five more seconds.."

"Alicia, come on.. You know it's your sister's graduation today.."

"mmm.. five more seconds.."

"Alicia Marie Davies if you don't wake up right now forget your pc for a week.."

"Come on mom.. It's not fair.."

"I expect you be downstairs in 5 minutes.."

Alicia is like me.. Always a heavy sleeper.. She has my temper but she is noble like Spencer. She sees the good inside all people. Alicia and Christine are fighting more of the times but they love each other very much. Christine still sees her as her baby sister and wants to protect her and that is what sets off their altercations..

"Did she wake up?"

"She knows that if she is not downstairs in five minutes she will have to pay the price"

"Ash.. did you tell her about her pc again?"

"It's the only way"

"Mom's I have to go.. I have to be there earlier for the sitting rehearsal. Ok? Love you both" she kissed us and left.. I was looking my watch to see if Alicia would be down in 2 minutes. She is like me.. She doesn't like anyone to tell her what to do. And when she is threatened she does the opposite. But she knows that today is a special day for her sister..

"Ash.. don't be harsh on her.."

"Spence.. this day is important. Ok? She knows that."

"I am sure she knows that.." she came closer and kissed me on my lips tenderly..

"Why oh why do I have to see that every day? And I didn't even open my eyes yet.."

"Goodmorning baby" Spencer said and walked to her side. She took her in her arms and kissed her chick.. Morning rituals..

"Hey mom.."

"I made pancakes.. Do you want French toast maybe?'

"No, I am ok mom. Thanks.. What time do we have to be there?"

"Well they have some rehearsal. But the ceremony it's at 11 oclock.."

"And you woke me up from 8?" she let her head touch the table

"Don't be a drama queen Alicia.."

"Mom.. you wake me up like 3 hours earlier.. I could be ready in half an hour.."

"Ash.. I can see that our daughter is like you in every way"

"What we can say love.. We love our sleep.. Isn't it princess?"

"Oh, yes mom. Definitely.."

"What am I going to do with you too?"

"Love us?" we both said unison with our same grin.. No one could resist us..

_**Graduation..**_

"We are here.. Where is everyone?"

"Ash, baby.. We are an hour earlier. Mom and dad told me yesterday that they would come the same hour as we are. Kyla and Aiden maybe come a little bit later and Glen and Felicity maybe be late just a little.." Yes, Glen Carlin found his true love and her name was Felicity. I approved of her..

"But it's my daughter's graduation. They have to be here."

"Ash.. you are cute.."

"I don't do cute Spence.. How many times do I have to say that to you?"

"Maybe another 13 years?"

"Maybe more.."

"I am so ready baby.."

"Me too.." I leaned to kiss her but for another time this day we were interrupted by Spencer's parents this time.. They were in time indeed.

"Hey girls. Did we interrupt anything?"

"Nah.. only my Spencer time"

"Ash.."

"Ok.."

"What time does it start?"

"In half an hour.."

"I can't believe that my granddaughter graduates today"

"I know.. You tell me Paula. I can't believe it myself. Thank God she won't leave. She got accepted in the UCLA"

"You must be very happy"

"Oh I am"

"Ash was very happy actually. She didn't want to say goodbye to her little girl.."

"Hey I have attachment issues."

"All mothers do Ashley. Don't listen to Spencer"

"Thank you Paula. Only you can understand how I feel"

"Where is Alicia?"

"Somewhere with her girlfriend I suppose"

"But she is too young to be in a relationship"

"Mom, Ash had relationships when she was younger than Alicia. And we know her girlfriend and she is a very good girl."

"Then I am ok.."

"Don't worry Paula.. I double checked the girl when I met her."

"Oh, yes she did. She was inspector gadget.."

"Hey.. like I would let anyone to touch my daughter if I didn't know anything about them"

"Of course you wouldn't baby"

"Sss.. It's starting.."

"Where is Alicia?"

"I am here mom.. Cool yourself.."

"Hi, Mrs Spencer, Hi Mrs Ashley"

"Hi, Susan. How are you?"

"Fine Mrs Spencer.." I leaned to Alicia's side..

"We will have the talk when we got home"

"Sash mom.. Christine's graduation is starting" she is definitely a Davies.. Definitely..

"Mom's how it was?"

"Perfect honey.. You looked great.."

"I know.."

"I wonder when my daughter became so full of herself" Spencer said looking at me..

"Hey, don't look at me.. It is not my fault.."

"It's not our fault we look great in everything. Don't we mom?"

"Oh, yes baby girl"

"Mom, I am not a baby girl anymore. I am 18"

"For me you will always be my baby girl.."

"Yes, asshole.. And I am not your baby sister.. I am 13 you know"

"You will always be my baby sister either you like or not"

"You were great sis up there. All we Davies girls are"

"And what about me? Am I not a Davies girl?" Spencer said with a sad face.. Me and my girls looked each other and told her..

"You are THE DAVIES girl mom" we hugged her and kissed her and I wouldn't want this any other way.. My girls and I..

Alicia and Christine followed the others and I just stayed behind with Spencer..

"We did a great job eh?"

"yes, we did baby.."

"We have two amazing daughters and I have you Ash"

"As I have you.. You are my love Spence.. My one and forever"

"I am so in love with you.."

Our love is something I didn't expect to find.. But 15 years ago I found it waiting for me in the reception of my hotel.. I found my one and only and I was complete.. Love is an amazing thing.. It really takes you away. As Spencer's love did for me.. Our love for ever..

* * *

**THE END**

**That was the end.. Hope you liked it.. I am starting a new story. If you want to read IT put me on author alert.. Happy to see you again..**

**Bye for now..**

**xx**


End file.
